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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Jul252016

NSFW Baby Shower Cake Accidentally BEARS ALL

Like a lot of new parents-to-be, Jen and Scott asked for a cutesy bear on their baby shower cake.

But instead, they got...

EFFING PANDAS.

I know, I know. At first glance you're like, "Nooo, they CAN'T be." Then you look closer, and you're like, "THEY TOTALLY ARE DA HECK WHO MADE THIS CLIP ART?!"

And bee tee dubs, those aren't even happy effing pandas, you guys. I mean, Mrs. P clearly has a headache, and just wants to eat, shoot, and leave.
(Grammar nerd humor HEYOOOO.)

So let this be a lesson to you, bakers: GOOGLE WISELY. Lest you, too, become bamboozled.

Oh, and maybe turn your Safe Search on.

 

Thanks to Jen L. for managing to grin and bear it. The cake wreck, I mean. Not the... OH NEVER MIND.

*****

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Reader Comments (24)

I don't think that one in front is a female bear.

Also, I love the little tongue.

Perhaps the baker wanted to celebrate the actual creation of Jen & Scott's baby rather than the baby itself. I'm just thinkin' that's the way I'd do it.

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

That baker had to know...

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKathyW

When China first gifted The U.S. with Ling-Ling and Hsing-Hsing back in the 70's, the entire country waited breathlessly for those two communist cubs to finally "get it on" (as was the parlance in 1972.) Cakes such as this were all the rage back then, and the depiction of Ling-Ling is quite accurate. Apparently she was sick and tired of both Hsing-Hsing, and the absolute lack of privacy. All the effing attention finally killed her in 1992. That's a long time put up with Hsing-Hsings smug panda face, believe me. Rest in Peace Ling Ling. Rest in Peace.

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Lisa said everything I can think of about the cake, so I'll say we have that book! I bought it when my son was confused about grammar and the uses of commas, etc. My kids love the phrase " Let's eat Grandma Commas save lives!!"

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

So weird. I'm sure that was originally two separate panda clipart images, then someone put them together like that on purpose, then this wreckorator picked the image off the internet without paying attention.

But congrats on your conception anyway, Jen and Scott!

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterErica

Trust me. The Baker KNEW. The baker simply did not 'EFFING CARE'. And he/she snickered the entire time, with an evil grin.

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemama

I'm not sure about the headache theory. To me it's as clear as black and white; this bear pair is fully engaged. (And I don't mean she's flashing her shiny ring to make other panda girls jealous.)
Look again-maybe they're practicing handing off a football. Or playing leapfrog. It might not be naughty bears at all. Unless that's how you see it. Then they're shameless pervs and don't deserve a cake.

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSmarie

It's like 50 Shades of Gray for Pandas

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMary

Well what do they expect when they go to Get it While its Hot erotic cake shop for their cakes. They probably thought the other cake they bought was in the shape of Florida (and if you got the reference thanks for being a friend).

Love Eats, Shoots and Leaves. Thanks for referencing that Jen. Great post as always. You always brighten up my lunchtime.

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJoeMama

AND once again, Cake Wrecks takes a bad Monday and makes it hilarious. Thanks for sharing.

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterTerri U.

I just had to. I don't know why, but I had to.
Bing image search "two pandas clip art". And there it is. The very first image.
It is titled "baby panda bear clip art". Apparently it should be named "making a baby panda bear clip art".

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterTriciaL

Oi! Maybe the baker knew the couple had had a hard time conceiving and thought pandas would accurately represent their struggles.

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterlizvocal

Unbearable.

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterDr Handle

Oh my....

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKyle

linlin, you're genius! I never would have looked for a legitimate piece of clip art. Now we know who to follow with flaming torches.

July 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterPatty Underwood

Oh man lol!! That had me going oh no they didn't then going yep this wreckerator did this on purpose then left town quietly when the couple came to get the cake lol.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

I'm just trying to figure out how the pandas' legs are turned and positioned. The two feet on the left look like they belong to the same animal, but are twisted oddly for the front panda, and shouldn't look like that if the back panda is sitting upright. What kind of Kama Sutra moves are these pandas demonstrating?

But yeah, you can Google "two pandas clipart" and this panda image is the first result. I saw it on a different site than what others have posted, so I'm not sure who the owner/creator of the image is. However, I do know that the person should really work on drawing correct perspective and animal anatomy.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMSTeacher3K

So impressed witht the way you dropped "Eats,Shoots, and Leaves" in there. Another reason why you are my favorite blogger

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKbirdcarr

@linlin... I checked out the link you provided and it is more shocking than the cake!
FIFTEEN ACTUAL DOLLARS!!!!!??????????!!!!!!!!!!
Someone at that bakery charged $15 to put that hideous and embarrassing mess on a cake???
I need drugs.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

These bears are a real pair of "sad sacks." No, wait... that's what's going on here! Sad "Sacks"!

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJMixx

Wouldn't MR. P be the one to "eat, shoot, and leave"?

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

WOW this is both disturbing and hilarious. MSTeacher3K, thank you for sharing that it is the first thing that comes up on a search- what is this world coming to?!

July 29, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterWildcatMo

No else mentioned the fact that they got your reference to 'Eats, shoots, and leaves' - but it's a great book!! Very British sense of humor, but funny...Really...Honestly...
You know, you've ruined me for life - every cake I see that's beautiful I find myself thinking of so very ways it could end up on your site...Plus, I may need to change grocery stores because I always check but have yet to see something I can submit!

September 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterGayleW

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