A Stark Difference

Proving once again the pictures in the bakery's order book are always too good to be true:

"Oh, you want your cake to look exactly like this?

"Noooo problem."

Who's the hot mess now?

Thanks to Marianna B., who wants to know where Jarvis is when you need him.

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

Top 13 Telephone Wrecks

There are literal wrecks ("Just write Happy Birthday on it,") and then there are the wrecks that literally suffer from a game of Telephone. And they're fabulous.

"Too Legit To Quit"

"Welcome Home"

"Happy Birthday, Cowgirl!"

"Valedictorian"

"Gettin' hitched!" (for a wedding shower)

"Happy Hanukkah!"

"Happy Birthday Beth & Libby!"

(And to think she used to be the life of the party.)

"Bye, Evan!"

"For Our Fearless Leader"

(At hour 5, she turns into a whimpering puddle of goo.)

"You're an ace!"

Here they asked for a big mouse with some little mice around it:

SO CLOSE.

While on this one they wanted "blue camo" - as in "camouflage."

Of course, there was that Obama/Llama fiasco. Heh.

And finally, my favorite:

"Don't Take No For An Answer!"

It says "Don't Techno For An Answer." Which is officially one of my favorite things ever. Because now I want to, dangit.

Random Person: "So Jen, are you coming to our baby shower? We're serving one of those hee-LARIOUS vagina cakes!"

Me: [puts on sunglasses] [cranks techno music] [moonwalks away]

Thanks to Mary D., Amy D., Cat D., Rowenna O., Amy R., Jill S., Emily A., Karen B., Liz W., Sarah H., Helen, Yvonee D., & Dori K. for that new life goal.

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P.S. Here's a (hilarious) reminder that English is almost as confusing as these cakes:

P Is for Pterodactyl: The Worst Alphabet Book Ever

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And from my other blog, Epbot: