A Little Rough Around The Edges

If there's one thing I've learned from Cake Wrecks over the past decade, it's that Epcot is a thing not to be trifled with.

If there's another thing I've learned from Cake Wrecks, it's that you can't make a rounded cupcake cake (ptoieee!). As in, ever. The laws of physics preclude even the merest hint of possibility.

Not that this stops our brave wreckerators from trying, of course. They seem convinced that slathering potentially life-threatening amounts of icing onto anything will put a skeptical customer into a pre-purchase sugar haze.

So let's look at how the seemingly simple circle becomes a disaster destined for diabolically dastardly...um...proportions. (No, wait. Dimensions! Dang it. Broke my stride.)

This...[dramatic pause]...is a base "ball."

And this...is Spider-Man:

Or what's left of him, anyway.

This...is...SPARTA!!!

Actually, no. I think this is supposed to be a hamburger.

"Eh wude lak to baa zebargare kek."
Baker: "I'm sorry, what?"
"Zederbergerer kek."
Baker: "Okay, I'm really not sure what you're..."
*sobbing* "DERBERGER!"

Well just remember, Wreckerators, you can always resort to that old standby: Piping, The Fix For Everything.™

Perfect.

Nina M., Amanda Y., Tyler M., & Ruth U., here's hoping the CCC will be circling the drain sometime soon. Think there's a petition we can all sign?

*****

P.S. Right, so cupcake burgers are a no, but SOCK burgers?

Burger Socks Box

SO MUCH YES.

I like how the patterns are subtle enough to be everyday socks.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

To Be Read By Rod Serling

Deedeedeedeeedeedeedeedee

You unlock this bakery with the key of imagination. Beyond it is another dimension.

A dimension of icing.

A dimension of piping bags.

A dimension of wreckitude.

You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance, of bad taste and even worse skill. You just crossed over into...

The Twilight Zone.

BUM BUM BAAAAAHHHH...

 Picture, if you will... a monkey. This monkey:

I know, creepy right? [shivering] Brrrrrr. Totally.

[resuming serious announcer voice] Ahem. Now picture, if you will, five ravenous-yet-dim-witted Shih Tzu dogs:

[sternly] Let's call them Muffy, Boopsie, Precious, Buttercup and Mr. Snuggles.

Now picture, if you will, a face of terror that watches in malignant silence far beyond your present capacity to understand. A face enigmatically bizarre in terms of time and space. A face...

...of a tweety bird.

 Now picture, if you will, Meerkat Zombies...raising the roof.

"What up, playah?"

This is the stuff of fantasy, the thread of imagination, the ingredients... of the Twilight Zone.

 BUM BUM BAAAAAHHHHH... 

SQUEEDLEDEEEE!!!

Jennifer P., Matt N., Christine S., and Melanie L., picture, if you will... a dolphin eating a Snickers bar in flip-flops and a cardigan. Then tell me what that looks like. I've always wondered.

UPDATE! LeAnna and Woobie took up the dolphin challenge and sent in their ideas.

First LeAnna's:

AWESOME! Check out the flip flop thongs on his flippers.

And next we have Woobie's

See, the snickers bar is wearing the cardigan and flip flops because I apparently have no grasp of sentence structure. ?thought Who would have

Touché!

One more!

This one's from Vanilla Smoke. Awesome!

*****

P.S. Here's one more read for you Rod Serling fans:

The Twilight Man: Rod Serling and the Birth of Television

It's a graphic novel - so basically a long-form comic book - about Serling's career and "descent into his own personal Twilight Zone." OooOOOooh. Looks awesome, and it has great reviews!

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: