Who You Callin' 'Pro'?

You all know I only feature professionally made Wrecks here on CW. The irony, of course, is that I mistake pro for amateur way more often than the other way around! Heh. So anyway, while I've been told that today's Wrecks are indeed made by real, honest-to-goodness, got-paid-for-their-efforts cake decorators, part of me still refuses to believe it.

I'm still posting them, though, because they're all wedding cakes. Served at people's actual weddings. And even if one was actually made by Aunt Mildred who calls herself a pro but really isn't, I think the world deserves to see this cautionary tale.

Plus, you know, it's funny.

Whoa, thank goodness for fresh flowers, am I right? Too bad they didn't have enough to hide the fact that the cake is being served on a giant dry-erase board, though.

I also like the gentle placement of the topper. It really screams "finesse."

This was taken during The Great Icing Shortage of '73 - back when grooms were stayin' alive with their groovy butterfly collars and the bridesmaids wore Frigidaire green. Looks like they ran out of flowers here too, though, and raided the fruit bowl instead.

Hey, "Love to Highway", right? And getting married doesn't mean the groom has to give up his matchbox cars.

And now, a haiku for you, wedding cake:

red bleeding ribbon
did the cake get in a fight?
lumpy icing tiers

And finally, before I show you this last Wreck, I feel I should reiterate that the bride herself *assured* me she paid actual money to an actual professional to make it. Honest. Really.

Now, in the baker's defense, I'm told the insides of all the cake tiers were raw.

How is that a defense, you ask?

Well, er...

Oh! I know! Imagine how hard it must've been to stack all those raw cake tiers! Eh? Yeah, I like to look on the sunny side of things. Which is good, because this cake is so sunny I can hear my retinas sizzling.

Hey, Grace C., Tony M., Anony M., Anony #2., & Anita R., "sizzling retinas" would be a terrible band name. Really. Just awful.

*****

P.S. Speaking of things that make your head hurt, a friend recently got me this gel cap for my migraines, and sweet icy Stay Puft, y'all, it's amazing:

Migraine Hot/Cold Gel Cap
 

 I have a huge head and a lot of hair, so it's pretty snug on me, but the extra pressure with the cold is heavenly during a migraine. I used to hold a cold pack and keep shifting it around from side to side, but this wraps my entire skull in a cooling hug. Ahhhh so good.

I keep the gel cap sealed in the fridge all the time now, so I can grab it as soon as a headache starts up. The cold only lasts 15-20 minutes, but it's 1000% worth it in my book, highly recommend.

Sunday Sweets Explores The Galaxy

Today we're going on our very own Galaxy Quest, cake fans, only this one won't include ANY forms of rudimentary lathes. (HA NERD JOKE)

No, instead I found 10 of my favorite galaxy and night sky cakes, so if you have a problem with black icing, green tongues, and/or technicolor poo, abandon hope, all ye who enter here.

Now, ON TO THE PRETTIES.

[By Redditor Skizorbit, posted here on Imgur]

It's like someone wrapped a photograph over the cake - bu that's all hand-painted!

I like how this wedding cake combined 3D trees around the edges:

[By Tastefully Yours Cake Art in Australia]

Plus the silhouettes are a sweet touch.

Here comes a technicolor galaxy inspired by the Hubble telescope images:

[By Sprinkle Bakes (blog only), who has a tutorial here!]

While this one captures the bright shimmery lights of the Aurora Borealis:

[By Clairella Cakes in London]

Here's one with a gothic flair:

[By Whipped Dreams (site unknown), photo by Orange Photographie]

I like the black-and-white abstract feel, and I never thought I'd say this, but those candles are the perfect topper. So cool!

A sweet and simple one-tier with the most gorgeous crescent moon on top:

[From Vanilla Cloud in Korea]

Look at that fun texture! Like a bunch of buttons! I bet they crunch like meringue, too.

This one literally writes the cake's message in the stars:

[By The Butter End Cakery in Los Angeles]

Birthday constellations!

And we can't talk about starry nights without including the most famous one:

[By Breyanne's Sweets in Texas]

There are a lot of Starry Night cakes out there, but I fell for the texture on this one: almost matte, like chalk pastels! But it's hand-painted buttercream, if you can believe it. Absolutely stunning work.

Since space is wibbly wobbly, timey-wimey stuff, it only makes sense to add a TARDIS topper:

[By Heaven Sent in Ohio]

The lights are a brilliant touch!

And finally, another out-of-this-world cake... of the whole solar system:

[By Dolce Dita in France]

I have the irresistible urge to pop the whole moon into my mouth y'all. Maybe Mars, too.

But not Uranus.

Happy Sunday! Hope these made you smile!

*****

P.S. Galaxy cakes are temporary, but this gorgeous blanket? Well, that's forever. Or at least a couple years, if your cats don't chew holes in it like mine do.

Galaxy Throw Blanket

There are lots of galaxy print blankets out there, but this is best reviewed one I've found. Vibrant, super soft, and not too thick!