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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Nov262012

Wrecks Reel News

[Old-timey news reel music]

Coming to you from Harry's Five and Dime in beautiful downtown Pleasantville, this IS Wrecks Reel News!

The big shopping weekend of '53 saw a slew of seething shoppers descending on local mercantiles, all in hopes of grabbing the deal of the decade!

Just look at them all lining up in a polite and orderly manner:

That's a Jim Dandy sight if I ever saw one!

 

The doors open, and they're off! Tearing through aisles, leaping over downed seniors; these fearless consumers will stop at nothing to get that last Timmy the Train:

And who can blame them? This new and improved model now comes fortified with heart-healthy asbestos! Isn't that swell?

 

What's that? Little Johnny wants a new baseball mitt? Ha ha, that's on aisle 5, ladies!

Boy, oh boy! That mitt's spiffy neat-o swell!

 

Ah, and here comes a satisfied customer now. Let's see how she's enjoying her shopping experi...

"OUT OF MY WAY OR I WILL CUT YOU DEAD."

 

Whoah there, calm down, sweetheart! There's still plenty of time to buy your husband those new golf clubs before you have to make him dinner!

 

And speaking of husbands, this weekend even saw a few men venturing out of their easy chairs to find a little somethin' for their darling dames!

Like high heels:

Great for the gams! Perfect with aprons!

 

And makeup:

Keen for the kisser!

 

And don't forget the Kirby Upright, now weighing in at just 47 pounds!

So much easier to push around in those heels!

And that's all from Pleasantville!

We now return you to Walt Disney's The Story of Menstruation.

This has been Wrecks Reel News, reminding you that every day is a Marlboro day!

 Marlboro: Fresh, clean, and recommended by 4 out of 5 doctors AND your own baby!

via

 

Thanks to Jess, Natalie B., Larissa G., Dani S., Alison, Brittni J., and Mark B. for reminding us that not everything was better in the good ol' days, and also that edible cigarettes are really, really nasty.

Sunday
Nov252012

Sunday Sweets: Wedding Cakes in Chocolate

Hey girl.
Today's post is dedicated to you.

By I Dream of Jeanne Cakes

That's right, to you and every other chocolate-loving chocoholic out there who can't quit craving the sweet stuff and have long since polished off the last 3 Musketeers bar in your kids' Halloween candy stash.

You know who you are.

So come along. Let's take a ride on the gentle waves of chocolate's sweet caress:

By Sweet Gems Cakes

 

Let's set sail on the decadent seas of sensory seduction.

Submitted by Debbie C. via Style Me Pretty. Photography by Julie Mikos; baker unknown.

Smell the chocolate. Feeeeel the chocolate. Taste the chocolate. BE the chocolate.

 

Let chocolate's smooth tendrils of tantalization entwine you.

By Layers

 

Embrace the chocolate! Let its sweet siren song wash over you and take you to a place where a rose is just a rose, unless it's a chocolate rose...

By Baking Arts

Because then it's like, a way better rose.

 

Unless of course, it's a painted chocolate rose. With ruffles. And twirly things.

By The Paul Bradford Sugarcraft School

Twirly things of temptation!

 

So surrender! Surrender to chocolate's rich and creamy charms!

Let the fermented bean pods of the cacao tree seep into your soul as you... um... wait.

By Cakes by Occasion

OK, so maybe that's not the sexiest description of chocolate you've ever heard. Sorry.
I'm running out of adjectives here.

 

Bottom line, chocolate is pretty much perfection.

By Wilton

Like this cake. Such perfection, I'm having trouble believing it's real. Look at those razor sharp corners!

 

And the only way this curvacious cake could be better is if there were even more of it:

Sub'd by Mary G. and made by Premier Pastry

 

I can't spot a single thing wrong here, either:

By The Pastry Studio

I'm just dotty for it! (The kids still say 'dotty,' right?)
(No? Well, I'm not very hip. My pajamas have cats on them.)

 

Of course, sometimes even the most fervent chocolate lover needs a break:

By Margaret's French Bakery

Like this. This is the perfect chocolate break.

Who could resist a cake literally paved in chocolate?
I can't. You can't. Don't even try.

 

Anyway, if you love chocolate so much, why don't you marry it? I think you should.

Sub'd by Jennifer K. and made by Kanya Hunt

If only for the cake.

 

Have a Sweet to nominate? Then send it to Sunday Sweets [at] Cake Wrecks [dot] com.