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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Apr172012

Easy As 1,2,C!

"Ok, Mr. Johnson, we're going to take a quick look at your tax forms for last year, alright?"

"Nooo problem."

"Great. Let's start with your dependents. Now, how old is your daughter Emily, exactly?"

"Oh, she hasn't been born yet. But not to worry; the wifey and I are working on that, IF you know what I mean!" [winkwink]

 

"Er...unfortunately I do, yes. And forgive me, but I couldn't help but notice from your previous returns that little Levi has been one year old for quite some time."

"That's a, uh, medical condition. Very rare. I'm sure you've never heard of it. But it's completely tax-deductible, believe me - just like his back waxing."

 

"Uh HUH. And I see that you and your wife, Ann - if that's her real name..."

"Oh, she likes to spell it with quotes. She's French."

 

"Ah. Well, you and your wife seem awfully fond of naming your children 'Andy.' Why is that?"

"We find it's just easier that way. And you should see 8th Andy with her ferrets - aDOOORable!"

 

"Look, Mr. Johnson, I'm sure we can get all your dependents sorted out, but right now I'm most concerned about your numbers."

"My numbers? What's wrong with them?"

"Mr. Johnson, I'm sorry to tell you this, but you can't count."

"WHAT?! Of course I can count! Counting is as easy as 1, 2, 5!"

"Three, sir."

"Oh, fine, have it your way."

"And perhaps next we should talk about your hearing problem."

"What?"

 

Thanks to Marsha N., Darcy P., Carrie Z., Jen M., & Nikki H. for taxing us with today's wrecks. Remember, cake wrecks and books about cake wrecks are completely tax-deductible, guys!

Monday
Apr162012

Body of Art

The flower represents the innocence of youth.

The stump, life's transience.

And the flaming tentacle hands cradling the noodle-limbed fetus broken in half?

 

Well, those are there just to freak you the f*** out.

 

Mission accomplished, Erika K.

 

(Btw, pretty sure those baby legs are going to be tap-dancing their way into my nightmares tonight.)

*Tappity tap tap tap*

*Tappity tap tap tap*

(Yep.)

(NEVER. SLEEPING. AGAIN.)

 

[Note from john: The "f" word up there was "fern." Wait... you didn't think... what is WRONG with you people?!]