One Line Horror Stories

I always liked the idea of fitting as much story into as few words as possible, so let's see if BAKERS can scare us in, say, 10 words or less. Eh?

BEGIN.

"You know, most of that is technically edible."

(It's the ones that are true that are the most terrifying.)

"What misspellings?"

"Everyone can relax, I fixed it!"

"That'll be $65.99."

And perhaps the most frightening thing of all to hear from a baker:

"Hey, can I borrow your shoe?"

(Yes it's a real shoe. Because of course it is.)

Thanks to Michelle L., Susan G., Alyssa M., & Anony M. for putting her friend's best foot forward.

*****

P.S. In case that wasn't painful enough:

Exceptionally Bad Dad Jokes

There are a lot of "dad joke" books out there, but this one has awesome ratings AND the word "spiffing" on the cover, so it's a clear winner.

******

And from my other blog, Epbot:

Greeeeeeeaaaaaat

It's time once again to educate our sarcasm-impaired brothers and sisters. That's right! It's...

Sarcasm Awareness Month!

How does that make you feel?

Ladies and gentlemen, sarcasm!

And that brings us to our first lesson: lack of punctuation.

You may remember one of the classic sarcastic cakes from way back:

The sarcastically inept might think this is praising Bob when, in fact, it's telling Bob to go suck an egg.

Let's try some more:
What are these cakes really saying?

This means the best probably happened a while ago, and you missed it.

This means you did something stupid - and everyone saw.

And this means nobody here cares about the specifics of your situation, so go away so we can eat some cake already. 

There you have it! I do hope we've made you more aware of sarcasm.

Because that would make us:

No, really.

See what I did there?

Thanks to Mariya N., Sarah C., Donna H., Kim B., Brad C. & Julia K. for being the brightest rays of sunshine yet, only in a really really good way. Honest.

*****

P.S. Here's a fun gift for the kids in your life this spooky season:

Little Blue Truck's Halloween Board Book

It's interactive with lift-the-flap surprises, has over 10,000 5-star ratings, and is on sale this week for $6 Prime!

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: