My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

It's a Wreck Off!

Alright, 'fess up, decorators: you're TRYING to outdo each other with the Wrecky cupcake cakes, now, aren't you?

Well, you leave me no choice. That's right, folks:


Now, let's go over the rules again, shall we?

1) Both cakes must be of the same subject matter, and the same basic form or shape.
2) The "winning" Wreck shall be the subject of scorn at company water coolers the world over for exactly one business day: no more, no less.
3) There are no other rules.


Well, folks, the Pastel Piranha came out swinging, taking full advantage of all that lumpy icing to better showcase its full pound of edible glitter. It's also showing its true colors "airbrush" style, and frankly, I think that creepy smiley face just may take home the prize today.

Ah, but wait, what's this?

OH! A devastating entrance has been made by Crazy Clash!

Wow, just look at that form. The hypnotic swirls, the glistening green slime, the death-pale torso! Crazy Clash may not float like a butterfly, my friends, but its design certainly is stinging my retinas like a particularly feisty bumblebee, I can tell you THAT.

What do you think, readers? Do we have a winner?

Michelle B. and Heather N., don't tell me this was staged: that just takes all the fun out of the sport.

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Reader Comments (227)

Wow, you'd think a star of Ashanti's level could afford a better cake. However, my vote goes to Crazy Clash. That just doesn't make sense.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Courteous Chihuahua

Definitely Crazy Clash wins!

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterChicka

That #2 entry looks like, well, #2. Unfortunately, that would be about how good a cake I tried to decorate would look.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I would have to cast my vote for the 2nd one. At least the first one has it's wings "attached", the 2nd just looks like they were an after-thought.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCC

Pastel puke takes it for me!
Ooh, is the room spinning for you, too??

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterad

the second one, crazy clash of eyes are still smarting from the blow!! :D

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSia

I'll need to see them at the pupa stage to make my final decision.

is it just me, or is the pink skewer making it look like the butterfly is pinned to the board?

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterShari

I personally like how in the #2 cake, "Happy Birthday" and "Megan" are totally different sizes. It's a nice touch.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

i actually like #1. D:

#2 though..... ouch.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMP

That green on Crazy Clash is positively urp-tastic.
On a side note, my husband and I are supposed to be providing cupcakes for my daughter's dance team for homecoming and I had to use this blog as an example of why we did NOT want the cupcakes to be airbrushed.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLeslie

My vote is for Crazy Clash's entry! The non-matching wings were what finally did it for me. I've never seen a butterfly looking so distraught....

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Lili Effect

I assume they're butterflies. Aren't butterflies known for their symmetry? yikes! Well, Crazy Clash wins for me since it's the least symmetrical. Oh and I love the tiny "Happy Birthday."

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMeagan

I'm going to have to vote for Ashanti's pastel piranha. The airbrushing and glitter just makes it super-wrecky! This is going to be a close contest~

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterlabdogs42

Crazy Clash all the way! Mostly, I think it should win because the swirly wing looks like someone's attempt to make a cake replica of a map of Alaska.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCEW

Do I spy a frosting decorating tip in wreck #1? It's funny to me how many people take the time to make these cakes and pass them off as a purchased "professional" but forget to move the cake decorating tools out of the background. I give it a "B" as in Bravo!!!

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLynsey J.

I vote for Crazy Clash because of the stunning asymmetry. Even the name written in icing on the right stands in stark contrast to the tiny plastic "Happy Birthday" on the left.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJoe

I vote for the 2nd picture. The wings don't even match. And just think of the color it will be when it comes out the other end...ick.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDanielle D.

Wow, they are both so stunning (cough cough) it is hard to decide, but I think I am leaning towards #2 as the winner (or loser, which ever is more appropriate)

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCatmania

I would say the Pastel Piranha is the most wrecky. The are both pretty close though. Love the bake off!

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterhorriblelicenseplates

I'm sorry - it just can't be THAT hard to arrange cupcakes into a shape that resembles a butterfly!! These both resemble amoebae.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterlois

I can forgive the regrettable color scheme of Pastel Puke if I assume there's a 7-year-old girl involved, but I can't deal with the non-matching wings on Crazy Clash.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCathy W

Second one. OMG. wow. I'm just starting up with cake decorating and hope I never make a hot mess like that. Ever. wow.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSmall Shake

Methinks #2 wins by a small margin. The bee stripes and the mis-matched wings push it across the finish line for rme!

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKameron

I think the creator of the second one was taking nips off the cooking sherry! As much as I don't like the whole air-brushed look of the first one, at least it's (mostly) coherent.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJohn

My vote goes for the second one. And I think we have to start an anti cupcake cake movement here. We need to get the word out! Both of those were horrible.

The face on it was very off putting.


October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMarlene

This may be a "just me then?" moment but I see Mr Hanky (from South Park)in both of them.

For the sheer "none shall sleep after ingesting this much colouring and glitter" factor, it has to be number 1 for me. Sure, number 2 has outstanding ugliness in it's favour but it's not going to physically damage the eaters in the same way.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Caked Crusader

There are no winners here, but that green is just nasty. I vote for #2.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMe

I vote for #2. I'm pretty sure nothing even close to that exists in nature.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJamie and Angela

Ah, the green does it for me in Crazy Clash. My vote goes to #2.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterStacey

I'd have to go with entrant #1. Enough pink & glitter to make even Mariah Carey ill! That one takes the cake *no pun intended!*

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLose That Girl

I have to go with Crazy Clash. It looks like a map of Alaska on the right side...

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLogical Libby

My vote goes to the second one - mostly because of the different wing styles in addition to it's general level of "wreck"ness.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJen

Although I find it most difficult to choose between these two abominations, the Crazy Clash is just too "crazy" for me. ewwwww.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered Commentergood1zrtaken

OH MY GOD crazy clash no question. total fail.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterweb diversions

It has to be Crazy Clash. The horrible colours, the completely mis-matched writing (itsy-bitsy pink and large, swirly purple) and the sad candle that is slowly sinking into the green slime.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRebecca and Chris

It's gotta be the 2nd... I mean really, they couldn't even write Happy Birthday, and had to use the pick!?
And everyone knows butterflies are symmetrical right? Same design on both wings, sigh.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterResplendentquetzal

I think (edible?) green slime trumps anything.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered Commentertamdoll

While they're both awful, I'm going to vote for Crazy Clash as the worst. While looking at Ashanti's cake, I wrinkled my nose, but when looking at Crazy Clash, I had a, "Wait. Huh? WTF? Why?" moment. That beats out a wrinkled nose any day.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterReiza

#2 crazy clash...definitely!!! At least the first one has consistency in

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterStacy

Eating edible glitter is, to me, like eating finely ground glass.

In that respect, they BOTH lose. Or does that mean they both win?

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteremilybrianne

crazy clash is worse, for sure. it's almost like it didn't even try.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

Though I am curious how glitter looks on the way out, I think #2 is the most depressing.

Is it a snail? "Happy Birtday, You're Slow."

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBanana

Oh, the second one. Definitely. Do you suppose they ran out of blue and pink, or just gave up and switched to green? Or maybe it's a conjoined butterfly?

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterYarnhog

The dogs and I vote for number two, the deuce, the trainwreck that is the most unfortunate looking butterfly in the entire universe.

I feel sorry for the kid.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMaggie

They're both awful, but #2 is far worse for its mismatched design.

Though I've long read this blog, it's the first time I've wondered what was going through the decorator's mind when they put that cake together!

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAbi Normal

Crazy Clash has to be the hands down winner. The green wing, the hypnotic swirl, the tiny writing...

Astute observation regarding the decorator tip in the pic for #1.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLiz

Number 2, for the win. For sure.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterErin

Have to give it to Crazy Clash. #1 was able to spell, and their handwriting's pretty good, given the subject level. #2...isn't that a pink plastic "happy birthday" on a stick? Meaning that all they had to write was "Megan"?


October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterFaithEllen

The first one looks like a masterpiece compared to the second.

October 20, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRach

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