My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Get Me Holly Hobbie's Head on a Platter!

I guess its the camera angle, but every time I look at this cake I see a baby head wearing a giant bonnet. And yes, a body-less baby would be a little disquieting, but I think you could make the case that a Baby Burrito is just as bad. What's wrong with a Baby Burrito, you ask? Several things. Allow me to list them for you:

1) Ok, first off, check out the baby's expression. It's no easy feat to achieve a look that's both dead-eyed and horrified at the same time, but this baker just has those kind of skills.
2) Next, try to imagine the position the baby's body would have to be in to have his (it's supposed to be a boy - more on that in a minute) chin lying flat on the table and his body stretched out behind. Who needs that pesky spinal cord anyway, am I right?
3) Baby is packing some serious junk in the trunk: check out that badonk-a-donk rump*!
4) There are no arms. Which, come to think of it, might explain reason #1.

Part of why I love all your e-mail submissions, folks, is that I have the option of grilling you for more details. In this case, I had to ask for a little more explanation regarding the, er, display. Wrecks reader Katie explained that the blue & white blanket was added to, and I quote, "boy it up", since the general consensus was that the cake was too feminine. And that black thing? That's a duck whistle. Yeah. It was also added to be, and again I quote "another signifier of the male gender". Yeah - a duck whistle.

Katie C, your family rocks.

*My sincere apologies to all R&B artists, individuals under 25, and non-honky people in general for attempting to use "hip" slang. I promise it won't happen again.

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Reader Comments (60)

pretty sure badonkadonk has no hyphenation. Your "it won't happen again" disclaimer, however, was the funniest part.

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJohn Gjertsen

I thought it was a baby stuck inside a watermelon!

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDeb

Alright, that does it. I move that we all write our congresspeople to establish an immediate moratorium on human-being-shaped cakes of all kinds. This has gone on long enough, and we need an intervention.

My next comment was going to start out with, "And did you see those eyelashes..." when it hit meā€”there's no way you couldn't have. So I'll leave it at this: while on the subject of the baker's mad skillz, let's not forget the often-sought ability to draw enormous, unmistakeable eyelashes that are completely disproportionate in size and darkness to the overall complexion of the cake.

And as to why cakes can ever have "complexions" in the first place, please refer to the first part of this comment.

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterChris

He looks like he's going for the whistle to call for help.

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJanell

The cabbage patch baby from hell!

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTina

First off, can't get enough of this website.

No matter how I look at this cake I only see a baby head with a bonnet. I understand what it's supposed to be, but you're right, arms would have been a big help. Let's hope there are feet in the back.

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

I totally see the giant bonnet. A floating head with a giant bonnet and a blanket wrapped around it because giant heads get chilly.

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHolly

It took me entirely too long to realize that it was not in fact Holly Hobbie @_@

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterheyt

to me it looks just like a head (no body) but with that swelling of the brain, or a growth coming out of it. UGH

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterbrazen's crafts

Very weird cake. No more baby/human anatomy cakes! Why would you want to cut into something like that?

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterreadsalot

I don't even know WHAT to think. I mean, egads. How does one even CUT a cake like that? I'd like a slice of baby melon, please.

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKittymao


I thought it just had a very strange hat on! I kept wondering, "Where is this big butt she keeps talking about?" WOW.

Did they just say, "How about a cake of a baby stuffed into an ugly pillowcase from Memaw's?"

'Cause if they did, mission accomplished.

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRachael M.

Did you notice that the dent in his cheek is deeper than the protrusion of his nose? Poor little floating head looks like he's been drop kicked.

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterslycreations


So which is worse, the baby head cake or the baby butt cake?

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Obviously this poor child is suffering from a major glandular problem - and it's affecting "his" head! OMG!

I'm inclined to agree with Deb who sez it looks like a baby stuck inside a watermelon. Yep. Definitely. What you said.;-)

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO

Actually coming from a under 25er you did petty well and it looked more southern then hip-hop :P.
My more loves making cakes and she showed me your blog. I check it daily lol. Keep up the good work.

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLashleyveta

I feel sad that someone paid to have this cake made only to have to add a duck whistle & boy blanket to make sure the guests knew the gender.

Also, this website is hilarious!

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterStacie

I love your blog. I check it every day.

Sorry to use the comment section (but I can't use the 'send email' link). Have you seen ?

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Mary? Yeah, she wound up with a c-section, but MAN, they had to cut it bigger than normal. Well, yeah, did you SEE the size of his HEAD??? Basketball comes to mind, no? And he looks so scared to be arriving, right?? Poor Mary, she thinks he's cute..."

That would be the catty sister-in-law talking to her friend about the new baby's arrival....

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDea

OK, Pod Baby aside, that is one serious piece o' work on that blanket. ;o)

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTrixieTaxi

okay i'm laughing your blog is awesome!

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAmydeanne

I'm having strong flashbacks to "Mars Attacks" right about now...

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm gonna have nightmares!!!! Someone hold me!

July 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTMTCO


okay, seriously, this looks like one of those platters with the roasted pig with the apple in it's mouth, except it's a cake shaped like a baby.

*runs to scrub her eyes with a brillo pad*

July 30, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteramp

I just found your site last week through a friend. I'm now a daily reader. Absolutely awesome! I know I'll get a laugh, or at least something to ponder, everyday.

July 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

There's the reason you never saw Holly Hobbie's face before...

July 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLaura Witkowski

OMG. That's a baby under a blanket? I totally thought that was a baby with a giant bonnett. SOOOO weird.

July 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

I would have the same dead-eye/horror expression, too, if I were stuck underneath some crappy basketweave-airbrushed blanket.

July 30, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNick

Ok, I see the babymellon, and I see the giant bonnet, but I saw this and immediately thought "Glow worm"

July 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterFlinx the Weasel

OK, so if I'm understanding this cake correctly, it's a baby lying on its front with a blanket pulled up so as to obscure all of its limbs and other human-type features (except the face). Not only is the poor dear about to be eaten in some sort of horrifying cannibalistic ritual, but it's also in danger of dying of SIDS first.

On reflection, I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse.

Katie, if you're ever called upon to make a monstrosity like this again, I'd consider facing the head the other way around.

July 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterProfessorDog

Haha, I think it actually looks like a baby blow up doll.

July 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLindsay

I'm with you -- I didn't get that the "body" was supposed to be inside the green whatever-it-was at all.

And NOTHING about that said "boy."

The duck whistle didn't help. I thought somebody just left their little camera on the blanket or something.


This is an AWESOME blog! Please keep up the great work!!!

July 31, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterhalfgk

She looks like she has no arms and no legs - a baby worm!! Very disturbing.

July 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterWho's Your Audience

Okay- I've been on vacation the last five days so I haven't been able to check your blog. I so love it! Good grief, the cakes I missed being exposed to. The deformed foot had to be the grossest cake yet. Seriously, who wants to eat that? I'm sure everyone there had looks of horror and pity between their eyes. This particular cake however, I actually thought was a girl, and then upon closer inspection I realized that it was being eluded to as a boy. I agree with the above writer when he says we ought to ban all cakes that resemble human parts. ALL human parts. Good grief.

July 31, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterkristin

haha...this is the funniest thing I've ever read! :)

August 1, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJamieM

I thought maybe the whistle was intended to be a microphone. Just what every baby shower needs...disembodied baby karayoke!!

August 2, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

My four year old was sitting on my lap and saw this picture. "What's that, mommy?" I told him it was a cake. "But that little baby is a frog!"

August 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTammy Coxen


Reminds of Alice in a cake in the Tom Petty video, "Don't Come Round No More".

August 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterGeorgie B

Good Lord, it looks like a severed blow-up doll's head, lurking under a really awful 70's bathmat. I think my mother had a bathmat just like it...

August 14, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMellissa

I've been following this blog for a couple of weeks, and this particular wreck has been haunting me since. If I'd been at that shower the idea of stealing that poor terrified burrito baby and hiding him somewhere safe would have certainly crossed my mind... I mean, how sadistic is this cake?

That said, if it's true that laughing lenghtens your life expectancy, I would like to thank Cake Wrecks for the extra fifteen or twenty years added ;-)

August 17, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMaggiethecat

The heading alone made me laugh so hard a little pee came out.

Absolute GOLD!

August 21, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Duck whistle? "boy it up". Pretty sure I'm going to die laughing. Don't order cake.

August 31, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLeah

Good Lord!!
I have tears rolling down my face, I am laughing so hard.
Just found your blog and I WILL be back!


September 5, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteraka Laura

Looks like a cabbage patch kid with a really bad growth coming out of its head...yuck! How can you look at some of this stuff??? I think I might have a nightmare. LOL

September 5, 2008 | Unregistered Commentermousekemom

Um... over here in the UK "honkey" is considered very racist! Maybe it means something different in the US?

November 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Sorry if I do this wrong; this is my very first blog post ever. And I'm sharing it with you guys!

I thought it was just a head. And I'm thinking... it doesn't have junk in the trunk, it has a huge alien head! Like from Indiana Jones.

November 16, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLost Eclipse

It is a very cute cake intended for a baby shower. I don't know for sure if this is one my store did or not, but we do something like it. It is very popular. The blanket "covers" up the baby. The face has been recently added to personalize. They were at first just "covered" up. No face. And yes - there are feet.

December 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'd like to see a picture of a baby cake you could do. Next time tell the cake decorators that you wanted a boy looking cake and the eyelashes wouldn't be so long and the blanket could have been given a different color. It's just a cake it's not like it's an actual baby it's cake it doesn't have to make sense.


January 26, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The cake is too funny but just to correct you on one thing it is a duck call not a duck whistle ;)

January 30, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterrho

Are you positive it's not a doll's head with a bonnet? Good grief, that cake is....interesting. xD

February 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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