My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Why Football & Bridal Showers Don't Mix

The happy couple-to-be chose his (yes, his) favorite football team's colors for the bridal shower cake, resulting in...well, this:

I'm not sure which is worse: the color scheme or the smashed floral squid-like creature lurking on top, its rosy tendrils poised to snag any unsuspecting guest who strays too close. ("Oh, look, hon! They spelled it right and everythin...AAAUGGH! It's got me! Getitoffgetitoff -HELP!!!)

Despite my dizzying array of sports knowledge, I'm afraid I don't know which football team out there dresses in orange, purple, and pale puke green. Any ideas, Ashley W.?

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Reader Comments (113)

Purple and gold can only be the hapless Minnesota Vikings.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJoyce

Ummm... is it supposed to be for Da Bears of Chicago? Oh the horror.... Even the female Bear's fans would think this was awful!!!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBakeBoutique

It really goes well with the pink table cloth!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Frightening and ugly in one cake!

Word verification seems aptly appropriate "worstso" -this is the worst wreck so far this year ;)

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

"its rosy tendrils poised to snag any unsuspecting guest who strays too close"...Fantastic commentary as always! The first thing I thought when I looked at this was that it looked like a giant spider on top of a cake....Orange? hmmm...

~Bonnie B~

WV: OPPESS- Help! We're being oppessed...we're being oppessed!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBonnie

It looks like orange and blue to me, which makes my best guess the Denver Broncos. And it is just the kind of thing a Denver Bronco fan would do (I saw not one, but four houses decorated in orange and blue christmas lights this year with the message "Go Broncos" spelled out.)

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

I bet it's a Clemson cake.

Sorry to curse on your blog. tee hee!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJocelyn

Clemson University colors are purple and orange but who knows if those colors were the intention of the Wreckorator. Maybe it's a colorblind attempt at gold and black? hehe

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

Can't explain the puke green, but my best guess for team would be the Florida Gators at UF. I'm not a sports fan by any account, but living in the heart of Gator Country for 20 years makes one sure to recognize blue and orange together as meaning only one thing.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNaoko

Perhaps the purple is supposed to be blue. Orange and Blue are the colors of several teams (Chicago Bears, University of Illinois, Auburn University all come to mind immediately). Of course, that would mean that the green was an addition of the decorator and had nothing to do with the team color scheme. In reality, I don't think it matters what colors were on the cake, it would be ugly anyway. This just made it worse.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Gag. Someone's either colour-blind, or has a bad sense of colour coordination.
~Amy B.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Is it still a wreck if it is the customers fault for choosing a horrible color combination?

We cannot be held responsible for their bad taste. We just take their money and do what we are told. Cake prostitutes...that is what we are.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJustfrosting

I turned to my fount of sports knowledge, my husband, who says that if it is a professional team, it might be the Broncos. Their colors are deep blue and orange. If that is the case, it only adds to the wreck factor. It could be a college team though and then, anything goes!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCharlotte (Matilda)

If it's college football, it's probably Lousiana State University. As for professional teams, I got nothing!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Maybe it's one of those things where you're supposed to stare at the cake for 30 seconds and then look at a blank white wall to see what the cake's colors actually are.

Maybe there's a lot of strife in the two families over who gets the roses. This could be a real peace-making cake, here.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterErin

Might that be for Clemson University?

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

It the famous Mile High squid from Denver! It's a shame he got caught in that rose bush.

Cause I really think that Purple should be Navy blue.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTralix

I would be so royally T.O.ed if this was my cake. Hilarious, because it's not. :-)

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHorribleLicensePlates

This cake is pretty wrecktastic.

If I had to venture a guess as to the football team in question, I'd go with the Minnesota Vikings. Their colors are purple and gold. Perhaps the puky green is really white in bad lighting.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterk-bro

Purple and orange are Clemson's colors- and quite the tacky combination! I guess the green is just to accent the beautiful roses with some leaves.....

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdevinisagirlsname

EXCUSE me? That cake is freaking bee-yoo-ti-ful!!

Obviously, you are not a Florida Gators fan. Orange and Blue is the perfect color scheme for football, bridal showers, you name it


January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAlix

That would be Clemson's colors...minus the puke green!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the Washington Redskins and even had my wedding colors burgundy & gold. Heck we were introduced as Mr. & Mrs to the "Hail to the Redskins" Song...but our wedding cake, grooms cake & shower cakes were not football themed. Let alone had squid like roses on them. This is a wreck but not entirely the fault of the decorator. The person ordering played a hefty role in this abomination! I imagine she said. "I want to make sure everyone can get a rose w/ their piece" ::shudders::

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterElvira

Wow, I thought the cake underneath the flowery squid was just football-colored. It wasn't until the end of the commentary that I realized that was supposed to be part of a team's colors.

Word verification: empant. Rampant empathy?

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMisha

Aren't the Broncos purple and orange? Oh, what do I know.

But I do know that I this cake hurts my eyes. Still, if they dished me up a slice, I'd eat it in a heartbeat.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHalf Assed Kitchen

I agree with Jocelyn; that can only be a Clemson cake!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRachael M.

Purple and orange belong to Clemson University in Clemson, SC!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I thought it was some sort of pseudo-Hindu pattern until I read "favorite football team colors." So I am way off base LOL

Is this supposed to be American football or "football" aka soccer team colors? Kinda hideous either way through no fault of the decorator.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCaliGirl9

And I quote: "I think cakes overall should use more orange, too, don't you? Year-round, I mean: orange is just underused."


January 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteraliciajennifer

I know nothing about US football teams...I'm Canadian(I know nothing about Canadian football teams as well... :0))

Having said that... this is an awful cake...purple is one of my favorite colors but not like this!!!!!!!


January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAzure Islands Designs

And I quote:
"I think cakes overall should use more orange, too, don't you? Year-round, I mean: orange is just underused."


January 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteraliciajennifer

That woman is a saint, because I would NEVER allow something like that to happen!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAshley

I'm going to assume it's a college team, such as Clemson, which has purple and orange as their team colors. There are other colleges with the same drunken color combination, but Clemson stands out in my mind, mostly because my SIL graduated from there a few years ago.

Since my husband and I cheer for different college teams, our cake would have been plain white and no team related colors permitted.Thankfully, we eloped.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFeisty Irish Wench

Well, as a native to Idaho, I can testify that blue and orange (if the flowers are indeed blue) are the colors of Boise State University. It's a running joke here that, between the construction-worker orange and the electric blue, you can see BSU fans coming from a mile away. XD (Though that cake looks more pumpkin and navy to me...)

If it's purple and orange, though, I'm stumped...

(Totally irrelevant but fun fact -- Boise State University's football field is bright blue -- we call it the Smurf Turf. Ducks have been known to crash-land on it thinking it's a lake.)

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKenya Starflight

I love how the decorator put so much effort into the ::ahem:: decorations that there wasn't even room for the bride and groom's NAMES.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered

as a gamecock when I see those colors I see a Clemson fan.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCharles

No, the Broncos are blue and orange. The first thing I thought of when I saw that cake was, "Now THAT'S a Broncos cake!" Indeed, it is something a Broncos fan would do. Being from Denver myself we're quite proud of displays of affection for our team and not ashamed of it--even in cake form.

All hail Saint John of Elway. May his blessed memory live on in all our hearts.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAbby

I think that's orange and blue - Go Gators!

I also think that it's a PAINFUL image, colors and floral sunburst alike. I'm dizzy.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commentergoffcouture

I think it's blue and orange. Go Gators! Or whatever.

I also think it's a painful sight! From the day glo orange to the floral sunburst... I'm dizzy.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commentergoffcouture

I was thinking of the Dolphins, since they're orange and that sea-green blue color.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The funny thing is that no one knows of a team that's actually orange and purple (and green, if we're being picky), which means the decorator screwed up the colors, too! The purple should be blue OR the orange should be gold. Either way, it's gross.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJohn and Sarah Sperry

The colors on this cake are PURPLE and ORANGE, not BLUE and ORANGE. This is clearly a Clemson cake...

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermaryjack

It's a shame that correct spelling and nice penmanship had to be wasted on such a hideous looking cake.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShay

Whew! Okay! So I'm not the only one seeing purple and orange...

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnthrophile

Are we sure it's football? It looks like the Orange and Purple of the Phoenix Suns basketball...

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWishTrish

Looks like Miami Dolphin fans.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjamiebentley

you know those people who want a rose slice of cake? they all are in this family! that explains the zillion roses. i would kill my husband if me made me have such a yucky color cake!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterutaduta

Now being a color person, since these two colors are complementary colors (opposite each other on the color wheel), if you take a spatula and smear and blend the whole thing together, you will get the most wonderful putrid brown poo color!

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHoolyjulie

I lived in Urbana for years and can't erase the mental picture of droves of Illini fans with bright orange pants. This could be a cake for any of them.

January 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdws689


January 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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