My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

The End of Sweetness

Ok, last Vday post. Honest.

(Until the next one, that is. Heheheh.)

Not that I can be certain these were really meant for Valentine's, of course. I mean, it's not like they give us many clues...

I would ask for guesses, but my heart's just not in it. Besides, even though geography was never my strong point, even I can see it's obviously the state of Texas. Right, Cori W.?

The gril lives!

Good to know, Shauna L.

Wow. It never ceases to amaze me: the amount of time, effort, and talent poured in to these CCCs. Don't you agree, Ann S.?

Well, I have a guess as to what this is supposed to be, Sherin G., but I'm not going to spoil the fun for everyone else. Go on now, guys: what is it?

[humming Jeopardy theme]

And while we're guessing, any ideas on this one from Marisa W.?

"I tell ya, 'E' gets all the love. She's all, 'Look at me, I'm the most commonly used vowel! Ooh, la-ti-da!' Yeah. Insufferable little show-off."

Then Kay found these, which are actually wrong... for being spelled right. There's a first!

See, they have a bee (sort of; that's one scary specimen), so they could have written "Bee Mine". But did they? No, of course not. I bet there's a cake out there somewhere with a sheep on it and the inscription "I love you", too. [shaking head] C'mon, decorators: get with the punny program!

Oh, and in case you forgot what we were celebrating:

Say, this could lead to a whole new holiday icon! I'm picturing Cupid, only stitched together from spare parts. Alyssa & Clark, do you concur?

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Reader Comments (150)

The first one reminds me of a chicken.

And I *think* the other one is supposed to be a 1/2 heart?" REL="nofollow">Spilling Buckets

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLes@SpillingBuckets

It's a broken heart, no? The mystery one. But I don't know what it says on it. SWAT?

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCharlotte

oh come on , this is totally Australia!!!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRhea

The icing on that last cake looks like that puff paint you used to decorate your shirts with in the
80's. Mmmmm, tasty.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkarmapearl

I totally think that first one looks like a chicken.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

I think the first one is a Valentine's Day chicken?!?

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMamaMia that half a heart with the word sweet on it? Maybe there was another half with the word "heart" on it?
Of course then if you put them together it would say "heart sweet"...or maybe it was a breakup cake.
Very ugly. I'm glad Valentine's day is over. :-/

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLeslie

I think the first one is a Valentine's Day chicken?!?!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMamaMia

I think the middle one is half a broken heart, maybe? Also, I think they did write "Bee" mine, they just squished the two "E"s together a lot (or maybe I'm just being nice)

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I know, I know! It's a kidney?!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkara

The first one at quick glance looks like it is a chicken for Easter or something...the rest are scary!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGina

Re: Cake #2 - the "gril" lives.

I believe that's the cake from "Rock of Love Bus". Or "Big Love".

Soooooo romantic (swooning)

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

Ugh, that half-heart cake looks inedible! Hmm, and isn't the double heart cake supposed to have only one arrow going through them? Good stuff!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDeryk and Becky

Okay is that mystery cake half of one of those 1980s style lockets? I seem to recall having one with a smiliar jagged edge that read

while my friend wore
FRI' around her neck.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterArcher

I could make snide comments about each individual cake...but I won't. Let's just leave it at this: CCCs are evil.

Aaaaaand, one more comment: that E-LOVE cake...what the heck is with all those sprinkles? I thought sprinkles were a bit of an accessory--didn't think you were supposed to cover up every square inch so as to make people wonder what flavor frosting was used... I don't really like my cakes crunchy, ya know?

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDangGina

okay, so, what's your take on the Sw ee ts cake? is that half a heart?

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteroriginalrager

My first impression of the "Valenstine's" cake was that it belonged in an Irish Pub.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterA&EMom

The brown mud puddle in the flower garden confuses me. Is it suppose to be after a rainstorm or am I just trying to read into it with more effort then was used to create it?

Maybe it's a fertile cresent??

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjengersnap

The first pic looks like a chicken to me. And I'm guessing the "sweet" cake is a heart broken in half. Just weird looking.

Love your blog!!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie

It is one half of a broken heart.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRoust

I'm guessing that the "mystery cake" is supposed to be a "Sweet Heart". It looks like the (scrunched) lettering says "Sweet", and the cake is vaguely heart-shaped.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdmontag

Wow. The first one looks like a chicken to me and the Valenstine's is really funny. Thanks for sharing!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelinda

That lovE cake is just so wrong. Seriously, get rid of those green 'leaves' and plant some fondant cactus or even plastic cactus in that gravel garden of heart sprinkles. It just cries out for a barrel cactus. ;)

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

the "Valenstine's Day" one absolutely KILLS me.

:scurries off to mock up a frankencupid:

wv: amblyrov. I am amblyrov about purchasing a cake for my next party if these are my options :D

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJo Asakura

I just have to shake my head that ANY decorator would think that some of those would be worthy of the plastic cover. Honestly, who would pay for some of that CRAP????

Although, thank goodness they do it, this blog cracks me up daily.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

Maybe the very first one is a kidney. Celebrating a transplant. Maybe that's what I'll do in a few weeks! I gave my husband a kidney 5 years ago this March 1st! Celebrate with a crapy cake :)

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commentergigi

So, the Valenstien's Day cookie cake...

Goosebumps? Anyone?

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAshley

Ummmm really, what in the world is that first thing? I just don't get how these people keep thier jobs!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

The one is the right half of a heart, like those friendship necklaces, where you have half and you give a friend the other half. Put them together and they make a whole heart.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Sitting at the computer, laughing hysterically, trying not to spill my tea, and my husband looks up and says, "must be cake wrecks, huh?"

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterVicki

OK, obviously geography was not your strong suit, as that first cake really looks like Ohio to me (and I've lived in both TX and OH).
LOL at the gril cake, though I'm not sure exactly what it says.
What in the world are the next two pics of? I mean, we know it is CCC disasters, but really, what were they shooting for?
The SWeeT cake, I'd go for half a broken heart???
Ending it with the Valentsine's cookie was phenomenal! Love it!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJo

The first one looks like a chicken to me. Or the outline of a chicken. With roses for... feet? o.O;

-A. Good Fedora

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

omg, and the companies who make these actually think they are going to SELL, looking like that? In this economic climate?

And the last one isnt even iced!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterrtb

I think it says "Sweet." But as to why it's shaped like a gall bladder, I have no idea. Maybe it's supposed to be a reference to mincemeat? Pork and kidney pie? blood pudding? (why are all the gross organ foods british?)

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMolly

Cake #5 might be a "sweet," flower-encrusted kidney. That's about all I can figure.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

My only guess on the Jeopardy CCC is that it's supposed to be an actual anatomic heart? Then that means "Sweet Heart" is a really disturbing way?

That's all I've got.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDorfmunder

The one looks like 1/2 a broken heart with (sweet?) written on it... a sweet heart broken???

Good Grief! the insanity never stops!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSerendipity

Is that supposed to be half a heart- like two pieces of a friendship necklace? Creative way to get the 'ee' in there. Only thing is if it's supposed to say "Sweet Heart" then sweet is on the wrong half of the heart.

WV: membediz: My bed is calling to me. Is it five yet?

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmroyo

I give up. Do you know what it is?


February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

wow. I really thought that first one was a chicken early for Easter when I saw the small picture on my blog previews.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLeia

On the "Guess What it is", I will say it is a broken heart with the inappropriate sentiment of SWEET on it. Or I guess if you are the heart breaker, SWEET would be appropriate. Maybe.

Of course, here in the south if you break someone's heart and enjoy doing so, it should be spelled SAH-WEEEEET!


February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTracy

I actually thought the first one looked more like Ohio than Texas. :)

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBeaver

I actually thought the first one looked more like Ohio than Texas. :)

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBeaver

The cake at the top of your post looks eerily chicken-like. Really, the hennish outline is quite striking, although I'm disturbed by the missing legs and feet. If this was, in fact, made from a chicken-cake mold, the wrecker ignored a barn-full of punny inscriptions in favor of those sad little roses... "Our love is poultry in motion..." or "You're a sweet chick!" or "Birds of a feather." Instead, I'm left wondering, "what the flock?"

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMaineCelt

The top creation might also be Ohio after a sudden, severe landslide affecting the top of the state. Either that, or Virginia got really fat.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHilary M.

Maybe the baker really loves to do E.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It says Sweet! on a broken heart! That is so weird. S W EE T. Lame.

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShannon

Ah, you all are totally right on the half heart thing. I'm so foolish!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDorfmunder

The mystery cake is what I imagine Van Gogh's ear looked like when he cut it off and sent it to that prostitute. *shudder* Seriously... if you turn your head, it's totally ear-shaped!! At first I thought it said SWAK (sealed with a kiss) but I agree, it is SWEET.

gigi, you really should give your hubby a kidney cake!!

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSkye

The time one looks like a kidney...maybe they got mixed up???

February 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDJ Holly Rock

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