My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

To the Pain

These cakes have been left to wallow in their freakish misery forever, but we viewers are the ones who really suffer for it.

For example, tell me you don't get a brain-ache from trying to comprehend...

The cycloptic smiley clover of despair!!
(Now with matching ladybug!)

And that popping noise can mean only one thing:

"Pool Party Patty" has some serious 'splainin' to do.

You know what every caramel cheesecake needs?

Pretty much anything but large poo-swirls topped with plastic mold-specked hot dogs and hamburgers, that's what. Although I'd be lying if I said I didn't like the little surfing 'dog on the left:

C'mon, a mini hot dog riding a poo wave? What's not to love?

And lastly, check out what Amy S. got for her rehearsal dinner when she requested a simple sheet cake with a logo on it:

I don't know what that is either, Amy, but I hear the chocolate coating helps it go down easier.

Moira & Stephanie E., these cakes are inconceivable.

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Reader Comments (225)

Huh. It's a CHEESECAKE. The burgers, dogs, and poos distracted me. (Why decorate a cheesecake at all? Let it alone, people! Cheesecake needs nothing! It's perfect as it is!)

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDangGina

Did Amy s. Get an explanation? Because I mean, come ON!

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSarahW

Eee, I think the bakery who made the last cake may have misheard "sheet cake"....if you know what I mean.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBrie

Gag; that first one is staring at me.
The poo waves are nasty!

The last one looks like someone had some left-over fondant and random plastic decorations.

~Amy B.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Oh wow -- Victory Junction Gang is the official charity of NASCAR... so maybe that chocolate-ness is supposed to be mud, from a dirt track after it has rained, splashing behind a tire of the winner who is doing burnouts in the swampy chocolatey mud.... um... maybe

wv:(my first attempt)
culta - Cake wrecks readers are in a culta all their own :)

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBrittany

Ah, love the Princess Bride references! :D

Was I the only one who thought of Mike Rowe (from Discovery Channel's Dirty Jobs) when reading about the "poo" waves?

And how on earth did the last bride get THAT for a sheet cake when people who order fanciful creations end up with a sheet cake?

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Yeah, I watched PB on AMC this week too, haha.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBeaksoftheFinch

Maybe the bakery took "sheet cake" a bit too literally & intended that last one actually look like a bed sheet... Who wouldn't want a chocolate sheet? Right?

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

Princess Bride!! <3

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

Is that a sequence cake?? First you eat your hotdog, then you get your cake, finally it all comes out as dookie. How excellent that the whole processes is presented in each tasty slice!

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStacie

Call in the Brute Squad!

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Awesome Princess Bride references! I love it. "Chocolate makes it go down easier!"

Seriously, those are some bizarre cakes. Hotdogs riding poo waves?

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The bride might have requested a sheet cake, but what she obviously meant was a couple of sacks of dirty laundry...

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Princess Bride references make my day!! and for the last one perhaps they heard simple sh!t cake??

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCarolyn

Confusion irks me...not being able to understand irks me. So therefore, I'm irked right now.

I would have forgiven the caramel poo had it not been for the hotdogs/burgers. I dunno where to start and how that made sense to the decorator.

Amy...girl...that's a hot mess you got there. Looks almost literally like a hot mees too.

WV: cheancu -- the biological classification of the creature in the first cake.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPassion Fruit

any day that starts with a princess bride referance is a good day in my book! Thanks Jen

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCaitlin Greene

If I'm right, and I'm never wrong, Gilder (the sworn enemy of Florren and all things cakey) is responsible for these wrecks. I'd stake my life on it. And "sheet cake" that word, I do not think it means what you think it means...anybody want a peanut?

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterklixtopher

Aww judging from the title I was expecting princess bride cakes. I doubt they make that many though...

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjacobithegreat

No R.O.U.S. cakes? I clearly can not eat the cake in front of me. :)

wv - heelesit - heelesit wondering if these "decorators" feel guilty cashing their paychecks.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the one eyed flower freak! I think I might make myself one for my next birthday. I mean you only turn 21 fourteen times.

WV: Granada-Canadian Granny

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLaLanya

How to explain these?
It would take a miracle
(Now with ladybug!)

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

OK, I would so buy a CakeWrecks shirt with...

"A mini hot dog riding a poo wave? What's not to love?"

That's awesome!! I laughed so hard I snorted Diet Coke up my nose. Mmm...bubbly.

You have some fantastic word journeys of your own. :o)

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHolly

The first cake looks like Mike Wazowkski dressed up like a flower for Halloween.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Huh. First a very long email joke about eating chili and the errrr, "results", and now a bunch of cakes that look like poo.

This should be an interesting day...

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBarb

yeah, I'm thinking the last one is simply chocolate covered sheets....and I think they were all made by a six fingered man...

Bonnie B

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBonnie

Pretty much every cake on here has made me laugh (or groan) but the last sheet cake made me say, ever so quickly, "What the f*** is that?" No exclamation. Just pure confusion. I love the Princess Bride. I totally heard "incontheevable" in my head.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie

How to explain these?
It would take a miracle
(Now with ladybug!)

wv: emocrat.

What the Republican called the sullen member of the opposing party.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Wow. I think this may be the wreckiest day on Cake Wrecks.

Why oh why would you put a plastic hot dog and hamburger on a cheesecake? Why?

And the "sheet" cake...OMG.

I wish everyone would go the Falker Satherhood way and bring video cameras. I need footage.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelinda

I thought I loved you before, but - Princess Bride!

Your brain, our comments, and customers' righteous indignation against the world's wreckorators, and you think a little Princess Bride reference is supposed to make me happy? Hmmm?

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Today's title definitely made me smile.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDave and Catherine

That was awesome. I mean it.

Anybody wanna peanut?

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline

I'm thinking we have a collision of websites here...

Cake Wrecks + icanhascheeseburger = eew

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Did they get to keep their ears, so that every woman who cries out, "What is that thing?" would echo in their perfect ears?

Loved the Princess Bride nod, and the crazy ridiculous cakeness. Keep writing!


May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRonnie

I'm thinking Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Angie (from over at

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHalf Assed Kitchen

Cakes, bad cakes, that is why we'wew gaverwed hewe today.

I'll have to see if I can find a pic of a LotR cake someone made me, they made Mt Doom and stuck Gollum in front of it. End result: it looks like Gollum tore himself a new one taking a poo.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRamona

Jen, you must have watched the Princess Bride over the weekend too.

"Hello, my name is inigo montoya, you've wrecked my cake...prepare to die."

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth Douglas

Oh come on people! Does no body think these cakes are INCONCEIVABLE!
Anybody want a peanut?

*I could go on all day and quote the entire movie forward and back, but I need to get back to working on my mahwaige photos. :)

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLaura Dotson-Thomson

No one noticed the campfire in the middle of the cheesecake? so. . .
Flaming Poo Hot Dog & Burgers!!
Which brings to mind another film, can you say "The Bog of Eternal Stench"

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMeagan

hmm i think the sheet cake is supposed to be like satin sheets, but its messed up... to literal people!

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Who in the world decorates a cheesecake?! That is just wrong on so many levels...

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

OMG - I totally want this as a T-shirt:

A drawing of the mini-hotdog on the poo wave

Below it: "A mini hot dog riding a poo wave? What's not to love?"

Below that, in a smaller font: "Cake Wrecks"

The drawing needs to be on the cute side, not the gross side, but I'm sure one of your talented readers could take this idea and run with it.

Thanks for the many laughs!

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Too bad there were no cakes of R.O.U.S.'s. Dang, now I have to make one.

And hey, caramel cheesecake? I don't care what they decorate it with, I'd still eat it!

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya, you wrecked my cake, prepare to die!!!

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRae


May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Obscure Princess Bride references FTW! :D

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSarah :)

Hahaha! Totally caught that chocolate coating Princess Bride reference.... and then saw the inconceivable 5 minutes later. I felt so smart.... and then realized it was so obvious.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWhitney

The last one is obviously a literally a in bed sheet.

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

LMAO!! That "sheet" cake is priceless! I can imagine the worker going: "A what?!!!" =^o
hehehe.... It's pretty clever for a square-lookin' pile o' pooh! Must have taken some skill =P


May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Frazzled baker running around bakery: "Sheet cake... Sheet cake... She wanted a sheet cake- Now what did she mean by that?" (Lightbulb flashing on top of head) "Oh, I know! I'll grab some bed sheets and cover them in chocolate! GENIUS!!!"


May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKritterBugg

Ohhh, I get it... it's a cake wrapped in a sheet. That's it, right?

May 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBuffy

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