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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Totally Stuffed

Alright, turkeys, ya fat blobs of fowl: ASSUME THE POSITION!

No, no, you're all too stiff! Look alive, now - get those legs out! Spread eagle!

Good, now, hold it - hooold it...


Good work.

Well, except for you, Tom:

Seriously, Tom, we have got to work on those legs.

Ok, now that we're all warmed up, let's get right to today's topic: "purging" your "stuffing."

My friends, this is not the answer.

Neither are explosive clean-outs:

Look, we all know these displays are distasteful, so let's stop the cycle of shame!

And take heart from the example of our own Admiral Ackbar, a former stuffing purger, who went from this:

To this:

(He assures us it's an improvement.)

Thanks to Libbie M., Beth G., Stevi A., Maida S., Gina B., Corie I., & Rebecca, who are convinced the Ackbar turkey is a trap.

« Wrecks of Plenty | Main | It's About Standards »

Reader Comments (79)

I guess it's sort of brave for people who've never seen a turkey to try to replicate one with cake.
Ill-advised, but brave.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

I can't remember ever seeing a cake on here that I wouldn't at least try (particularly if it was chocolate), but the greenish zombie turkey turns my stomach.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCount Mockula

Wow. Just... wow. Wreck #1 & #3 are both green. Yuck! And is #6 really supposed to be a turkey?? And why would you want to have a "cooked turkey" cake anyway??? These wreckorators have gone to the dark side of the force.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKay

I always look forward to the Thanksgiving turkey cooked by my Grandmother. Thank God her turkey looks and tastes so very much better than these hideous cakes.

As the first poster said, ill-advised. Very ill-advised.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAngie


The Admiral Ackbar turkey is the best!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterErin

Hahaha "It;s a trap!" The resemblance is striking!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy's Cooking Adventures

The Admiral Akbar bit was hilarious. "Don't eat it! It's a trap!"

WV: "Martar." As in, "You'd have to be a 'martar' to eat one of these cakes."

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love how your posts always take me gradually from "wow, that's pretty ugly," to "ick, hideous," through "for the love of all that is - surely it can't get any worse!!" and finally, "AAAAAUGH!!! MY EYES!!! My EYES!!!! AAAAAAAUGH!!!!!"

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I don't understand why someone needs to have a cake shaped like a turkey for Thanksgiving when you already have...a turkey.

Surely there are better designs for a festive table!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

OMG, I want to throw up. Not hungry anymore, least of all for cake. So thanks.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterA.J.

On the "explosive" turkey -- well, at least the chrysanthemums are really well done.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

Is #3 an alien turkey? Otherwise it needs to see the business end of a trash can because it's WAY past its expiration date!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

I must remember not to check this site at breakfast.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPersephone

what's better than poo cake?

Poo turkeys!


WV: Canollo. I threw my turkey cake down the canollo.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly

Maybe one of these is vying for a second chance at being our nation's National Bird.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Admiral Ackbar... Aheh. Aheheh. AheheHEHeheh. Aheh.

WV - comah: Seeing these turkey wrecks put me in a food comah without the benefit of actually having eaten anything... X_X

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma!

The "TOM" Turkey looks like it went bad like 2 years ago, even the stuffing looks moldy. YUCKKKKK :P

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMamakitty1978

And besides, that first turkey is RAW! Who would put that on the table? Sam'n'Ella, that's who!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMomcat

For some reason I love the "Roasted Turkey Cake" sign. First of all, because if the whole lot I think that one needs the most identification help. Also, when you put it that way I assume it's somehow...turkey flavored cake perhaps?

I like to think that turkey cakes are for vegetarians (with a sweet tooth ;)) and THESE turkey cakes...? Are for turning everyone else vegetarian as well. I know if someone showed me one of these and said "that's a turkey!" I'd be hesitant to ever eat one again :P

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaurenH

Wow. Those are flipping disgusting.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFie upon this quiet life!

#6 is the TRON: Legacy Turkey Light Cycle cake. Am I right or am I right?

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdrumnate

hahahahahaaa!!! you killed me with the Ackbar cake! I love it! :D

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAlyssa

The second lot of cakes look all ready for a gynaecological examination.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The fact that "Admiral Ackbar" there is shooting laser beams just, um, takes the cake.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShanti

These are the worst looking cakes ever in the history of the universe.
The end.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Those are the best wrecks ever.... why have real turkey when you can have cake??? *LOL*

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPaula


I think...

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJess

@Lauren H: You can wash down that cake with turkey-and-gravy soda from Jones. And apparently they've also come up with a Tofurky and gravey verssion for vegans. I've tried the former, and believe me, you're better off with the cakes.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkayk

Good lord. I know that the wrecks are often hideous and always WTF-worthy, but its hard to make cake, sweet delicious cake, look unappetizing. However, these turkeys (especially those who are in the process of losing their stuffing) have managed to inspire the gag reflex in this hungry reader. Disgusting!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNicola

I have to agree with Katie... I don't understand the why behind the turkey cakes. Especially these, which are, I'm guessing, supposed to be cooked-turkey cakes.

The Akbar shift? *mwa* Magnifique!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPhotoGrace

#3 actually has the little pop-up thermometer in it. Someone went to the trouble of putting a fake thermometer in the turkey and then made CURLY wings???? And pitiful little LEGS??????

And, yes, I wondered what the very brown one was--TRON Legacy Turkey Light Cycle is the perfect description.

The others I simply prefer not to think about but thanks for putting Admiral Ackbar in my head. Now I'll never be able to look at a roast turkey again without thinking of him. Sigh. ;-)

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKnit Wit

None of these turns my stomach as much as last year's shiny turkey cake with grapes and caramels for stuffing. Caramels, Nurmel! CARAMELS!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

...does Tom / cake #3 have a nipple??? (well, I kinda hope for him he actually has two)

Seriously, what is that thing on his chest supposed to be? Are American turkeys different that way?

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the Star Wars references! Not so keen on the cakes, however.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

I almost had yogurt all over my monitor when I got to the stuffing purge cakes! Oh my gosh. So gross! Thanks for the laugh and have a Happy and Blessed Thanksgiving! (full of yummy foods that are actually pleasing to the eye as well as the palate)

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaura P.

I don't like cake anymore.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi D

A CAKE...made in the shape...of a...TURKEY?!?!?!!???!!!!!
What on EARTH is THAT all about?????
and before you start - even an English person knows that Thanksgiving celebrations involve turkey, but TURKEY CAKES AS WELL????


November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPinnywearer

Ewwww,EWWWWW, EWWWWWWWWWWW. Enough said.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

What is the purpose of a cake that looks like a turkey?

WV: unsin. The wreckorators tried to make turkeycakes sight unsin.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermimiheart

You know, I now look at all the cakes in grocery store bakeries and WalMart and where ever cakes gather to be decorated, hoping to find something awful enough to land me on CAKE WRECKS.

Now isn't that a sort of sarcastic approach to life? I ask you.

Of course it suits me perfectly. LOL

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary Connealy

Turkey is both the best and the worst things about thanksgiving, and this post really illustrates it.

Turkey cakes are dangerous... thawing turkeys is dangerous too. Those things are solid ice and often look worse than these sugary treats!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMy battle with the turkey...

Lol, poo cake with tuna salad stuffing! Forget the pumpkin pie, Ma, here's dessert!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFlartus

Cake wrecks 5-7 made me shift uncomfortably in my chair. Just...ew.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMrs. Howard

The first two just made me think of Eraserhead.

Come to think of it, some of the later ones did too.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKathryn H

Anonymous @ 10:06 -- I totally agree. Typical CW processing - semi-ok (well, maybe), to bad, to worse. Love it!

I am astounded by what people in other areas find in their cake departments. I must live in a CW-free zone. (I THINK I'm happy about that)

The one spewing marshmallows (#4) appears to be created out of the icky winter squash rather than cake -- followed by a burnt 'roasted turkey' (#6)?? What are those things on the side? As General Akbar showed up, are those Princess Leia side-curls in sympathy??

In defense of most -- the flowers are really well done. About as well-done as the first 'bird' is NOT. Is that more 'cake' representing other foods next to it? Please tell me it's not.

I am now thanking the pilgrims for leaving cake off the menu at a traditional feast and utilizing the appropriateness of pie.


ps.. love the double entendre' of 'stuffed' for these wrecks.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermladybright

No turkey cakes. NO!


"It's a TRIP(tophen)"

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

ugh, that last "turkey" made me want to skip thanksgiving this year!

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAlice

Eeeewwww. It's a really bad idea for a pregnant lady in her first trimester (complete with constant nausea) to look at those really nasty turkey cake pictures, as I've just discovered. And, if you have to make a turkey cake, why add explosive stuffing all over the bottom? These wreckerators really have their creative juices flowing:)

wv: gueto
These cakes are so gueto.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

Looks like they were made with, you know, longing. Made by a person really longed to see a turkey.

Perhaps because they'd only heard of them by rough description.

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterathenienne

Wow, gotta love cake #6. "...the leg bone's connected to the - WING bone..." Hahahahah! Seriously, what's with the dookie swirl wings?

November 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLynn

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