My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Flip Flops (Hey, Look, a Built-In Pun!)

I once read one of those "You know you're a Floridian when..." lists, and number five was " wear flip-flops to a wedding."

Now, as a long-time Florida resident, I feel I should defend my fellow Sunshine Staters by informing the rest of you that they make some *very* dressy flip-flops. Have you seen the ones with the little rhinestones on the straps? [sing-song voice] Daaar-ling! And totally black-tie appropriate, I might add.

Anyway, during the summer months it quickly becomes obvious which Wreckerators have not only never worn flip-flops, but have probably never even seen a pair, either.

If these look right to you, get thee to a podiatrist! Stat!

What the...?

Good grief, that almost makes the cupcake cake [patooie!] version look decent:

Wait., it doesn't. Never mind.

Aha! Well there's your problem: these aren't flip-flops, they're "flipp flopps."
Must be a Canadian thing.*

It gets worse when Wreckerators introduce a 3D element:

I honestly have no idea what that is jammed into the cake: Ribbon? Plastic? A moldy fruit roll-up? Bottom line: if you have to ask, don't eat it.

Here's one using either a piece of electrical wiring or a radioactive Twizzler:

But the airbrushing is what really sells it.

Of course, jamming a bit of ribbon or "candy" into a cake for the flip-flop strap is awfully complicated. Someone was bound to screw it up eventually:


Shana M., Kelly M., Hannah H., Xiaomi Q, Beth C., D'Anna, & Gins V., thanks for taking a step in the wreck direction.

*Yes, actually, I do think that's funny. (Love ya, Canada!)

Note from john - Sorry everybody; I didn't get to comments for fifteen minutes and it appears we have a "bacon" EPCOT. Completely my fault. Sorry and wreck on!

UPDATE: Once again, Google Adsense wins the day! Check out the screen shot Tara G. sent in:

"Flip-Flops in BRIDESMAIDS Colors"

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Reader Comments (164)

I don't think that's ribbon, plastic, OR moldy fruit roll-up. Looks like bacon, which is automatically awesome!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRev

The fourth one looks like fried eggs invading two wave pools.

I heart flip flops!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDB loves her Mac

I think that material on your first 3D is actually bacon! At least, that's what *I'M* going to call it. Because, sadly, that's more appealing than anything else i could think of.

Are you SURE the last one are flip flops? I thought maybe it was Sponge Bob's twin younger brothers.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

I think the "straps" on the 5th cake are actually bacon... Because we all know how much pig fat and butter cream go together.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKate

Is that bacon on the 5th one from the top?

Our household agrees: Those unidentified flip flip straps are ... bacon!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShe

i'm afraid that may be bacon!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermiss corner cape

#1 As a former Floridian, flip flops can be damn classy with the right toe nail polish! And don't all weddings ever take place on the beach anyways?

#2 I think those straps on the fifth cake are made of bacon, which really challenges that "bacon makes everything better" claim.

I thinks that's bacon on the red ones...hahhha

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

i honestly think # 5 has bacon for straps. bacon makes everything better...just sayin'

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjulie

As a former Floridian myself (with the wide gap between my big and second toes to prove it), I am amazed that the shape of a flipflop is so difficult for people to reproduce.

Tutorial --
Step 1: place paper on floor.
Step 2: place foot on paper.
Step 3: draw outline of foot on paper with pencil.
Step 4: remove foot.
Step 5: cut along pencil line.

Anyway, what struck me about these wrecks --
CW#4 - first thought "gunboats"
CW#5 - first thought "strips of bacon"

BTW: The GKTW Pepsi voting has raised it from #11 to #9 as of this morning. Way to go!!!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

Mmm, bacon strip straps.

Are we sure the WV is random? I just got "words."

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

Looks like bacon on that one cake near the bottom!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

BACON!!! Those unidentified "toe-straps" are BACON!!! Man, those Wreckerators are out-doing themselves.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

Is that...bacon????

I have seen sandals with that single-loop band they attempted to recreate on the last one. Of course, the sandals were not shaped like boxes.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFlartus

I think the "3D element" on the red ones are actually strips of bacon. Mmmmmm bacon and cake.


June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKristin

I'm pretty sure that the straps on the one third from the bottom is bacon.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWoodElves

Could be bacon "ribbon" on those bright pink ones... Nothing makes a cake taste better than bacon! hahahahahahaha!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The cupcake flip flops look like they've incorporated the springs/trampoline style to them. It STILL makes them "flops" in my book.

Sharon's Edible Art

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ok, about the first 3-D element picture... It looks like bacon!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Heuslein Family

I believe that actually is a blue twizzler.

That last one makes me believe there is no hope for our species. There are millllions of people who wear flip flops and you can't even get the thongs in the right configuration?!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The 3-D straps look like bacon! I suppose for some, that may make the cake more appetizing... [shudder]

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Actually it kind of looks like bacon.....

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRenee

That moldy fruit roll up thing looks like bacon to me. mmmm, bacon.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

Is that BACON I see???? (on the 1st 3D cake)

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdonna

Fifth cake down, 3-D, that's not ribbon or plastic, that's BACON!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbassgirl

The straps in that fifth one look exactly like our dog's treats - I think they're called Beggin' Strips or something like that.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

Is it just me or does that first 3D pair look like they used bacon for the straps?

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

I think that was you thought was fruit rollup is actually bacon.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnnemarie

Oh wow!! That's all I have right now... and a coffee eruption to clean.

The straps on that 5th cake almost look like bacon, which makes about as make sense and the cake itself.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

Another vote for bacon!

And now when people ask me why I *hate* flip flops, I will simply direct them to this post. Thank you for once again simplifying my life with cake, Jen!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLeftWingLock

Cupcakes with bacon seems to be the latest trend. Guess the wreckerator decided to be trendy with their flip flops as well.

Sharon's Edible Art

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

gosh, I hate flip flops. Even as classy as they look, you can't get away from the sound. I agree with the bacon bit but what about the one that looks like it was made from twinkies?

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStella

Canadian thing, my ankle strap. In most places here, they're usually called thongs, though that little word is slipping out of style in favour of flip flops due to the strappy thong being in an entirely different place these days.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJanet

That IS a blue Twizzler - there's these tropical flavored ones that come in all sorts of neon colors like that.

I must be the only one who didn't think that was bacon.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

These all look like club feet or moon shoes. Reminds me of elementary school.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTaylor

OK I'm TOTALLY LMAO at the comments now. I know we don't see them until they're verified, but I LOVE that there are like 17 "I think those are bacon" and "bacon makes everything better" comments without those people ever seeing what the other posted! I guess the term "Great minds think alike" comes into mind! LMAO!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Okay The Bacon flip flop cake, At first I thought bacon too. But if you zoom in on it they have wavy lines on them. I don't think bacon has wavy lines. I am going to have to go with fruit by the foot. Here is another cake with fruit by the fruit on it.

See the wavy lines are here too. Fruit by the foot. I am positive!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterangelaross1975

"Bacon EPCOT" made my day. What a clever husband...

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy Park

Oh these all remind me of the beautiful clogs in the children's book "A Pair of Red Clogs" by Matsako Matsuno. Nice and square and chunky.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I was looking at the flip flop with the radioactive blue twizzler when my 2 1/2 year old walked up. She said "Mommy, cake! Why is there an M on it?"

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKate F.

Ha! The first thing I thought was "bacon", too! Also, random story: We went to a six-year-old's birthday party this past weekend. They had an ice cream cake (that tasted like it had been stored in the freezer since 1976). Chewing politely, I came across something that was not ice cream, nor cake, nor frosting, nor grotesque rice paper with a VERY weird picture on it (that list just reminded me of Augustus Gloop). Any guesses what I discovered? A gummy bear. Frozen solid. Is that normal and I've somehow missed this new trend? I found several more (after digging through other random pieces). Weird, just weird.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarcy W.

That second to last one is perfect. I can't even decipher what the airbrushing is!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

Cake and bacon? Sounds like the restaurant from an episode of Fairly Odd Parents. "I'm frosting intolerant!"

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercyn

True story. I have a glorious picture of a flip flop cake. I would submit it, but I'd rather not invoke the wrath of the baker (long story). Suffice to say, it did sorta look like flip flops (the shape was better than the ones on here), but the straps pretty much wilted onto the cake (too heavy, the fondant was). Worst part by far? It tasted like cigarette smoke. So yeah, the bacon straps sound delightful and I would've preferred my "smoked" flavor to come from pig products, not tobacco. It really was a wreck. Best part of all though, was that the recipient of the cake LOVED it. I guess I should be glad he has no sense of smell, eh?

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHiding in plain sight

When I first saw that 5th pic the first thing that went into my mind was "why is there bacon on cakes???" These are really, really bad!

and the last pair?? WTH?


June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSandy C/gscout73

oh my! That's terrible!

I made one of these once that was really cute. These are awful!

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

The second one, the blue bulky one does resemble one Asian style of thongs/zoris/flip flops you might find on the West Coast. They are more often worn in the house than on the beach as they are often padded with fabric - not made with rubber. These are not terribly beautiful but aren't so far off to be called a wreck. Really. Norine

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I do have to say that the subject of this post is exactly the reason I hate flip/flop cakes. They just cannot be done right.

I do not get the appeal: Hey! Lets all have a piece of a shoe... Is that toe jam filling??


June 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSandy C/gscout73

I'm going with the bacon theory! Not kosher, and sounds horrible, but that's what it looks like.

June 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermimi

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