My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Strategic Strategery

September is International Strategic Thinking Month! Time to celebrate the joys of planning, forethought, thinking ahead, planning, and, you

Hey, look! Cake!

Dashes make everything better - I'm sure Queen J agrees.

Don't you hate it when there's that one really looong word in your inscription?

[shaking fist] Darn you, "happybirth!" Why do you have to be such a long, difficult-to-break-up word?!?

Of course when you do split up long words, knowing where to make the break is key:

In this case, placing "grounn" and "dhog" on separate lines just makes good, old fashioned sense. You know, kind of like cocaine in Coca-Cola. Or leeches.

'Course, if you play your cards right, then you won't have to break up any words:

[squinting seriously] "Now that's strategery."

Of course, when you have an oddly shaped cake strategic thinking is a must:

See how the baker left off the edge dots where the letters hang over? [tapping temple] Smarts, man. Smarts.

Nadine, Justine J., Krista M., Kevin H., P.K., Erin P., I wrote a short speech to thank you all for your contributions. [ahem hem hem]


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Reader Comments (62)

I hope Courney is a typo.... Poor girl if it isn't.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

Besides all of the usual horrible things about those cakes... Cake #2 has GREY icing on the border???? Grey??? I mean, seriously, who ever heard of decorating a cake with grey icing? At the very least, it looks rancid.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonkaloosa

It's a great way to start m
y morning ... chuckling thro
ugh your observati
ons. I enjoy your co
mmments a lot! :)

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMorgan

The last cookie cake seems to be wishing "Courney" a happy day.

WV: wilikeli
"willy nilly's" long lost cousin. These wreckerators wrote on the cakes all wilikeli!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Strategery ehh? Reminds me of something I read in a webcomic that I wouldn't post in mixed company...

wv: schbit - A Lot of these cake wrecks really look like schbit.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJason

A few of these would have better spacing if they'd just turn down the dial on the size of the piping. Geeeze. What are they writing with, a tube of toothpaste?

Then again, that could explain the minty blue and spearmint green ones...

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjengersnap

I was just thinking of this yesterday while I was decorating my 5 year old's birthday cake. The words weren't perfectly centered, but at least I didn't do anything like this (well, the "y" in birthday was a little close to the edge).

Seriously, it would be nice if they'd issue a spelling test, and maybe a spatial relations test to cake decorators. Though cakewrecks wouldn't be nearly as funny that way. :)

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMuria

These are professionally-made cakes?


September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Hey, I saw a grounn dhog just Tuesday!

Grey icing? Why, why, why?

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

What amazes me about "Courney"'s "cake" is the fact that the wreckorator had to go BACK over the inscription a second time with the white icing.

Which certainly is proof of premeditated strategery, if you ask me.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFlartus

Who knew that "Krista" was such a hard name to spell correctly? But at least she got all of her letters, unlike poor "Courney."

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelinda

Looks like someone couldn't wait to get to the Reunio -n to sample the cake

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

These actually had me chuckling at my desk! I totally lost it at GROUNN DHOG! Good thing my boss is in his office!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

I love that Grounn DHog would have fit without the second n in Grounnd. :)

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPat O

Is 'Wol' from Winnie the Pooh now decorating cakes?

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

her name sounds like corn-y?? hope they forgot the "t"

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertiny purple elephant
September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKate

There's cocaine in leeches?

What these Wreckers are to capable decorators.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRob W.

I think the reunio-n cake decided to split before it embarrassed itself. Or because it did? I love the piece on the right trying to make a break for it.

Happybirthday... really? One word? *snort*

Grounn dhog... is this a strange brown dog?

Totally not sure if the toothpaste for the 70 yr old is a comment
-ary? Or did it need to be neon glow-int -he -dark?

Poor Courney... albeit appropriate ,-) Dang heart shaped cookies, anyway!

Short speech -- " ??? *snicker*


wv - diggimm!!!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Boob Nazi - I laughed out loud when I saw "Courney!" Like this: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! The End.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarcy W.

Oh, my! I think the icing on #2 is supposed to be mocha. Like a light chocolate. Though what they did to it to get it that color.....

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

What is up with the horrible penmanship? I don't care if they spelled everything correctly, I'd be mad if the cake I picked up looked like that!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTammy

Even aside from the bad spacing and fat lettering (whatever happened to the piping tips with thin holes?) what's with the random lettuce leaves on the first cake?
And poor QueenJ, not only is her name messed up but it looks like they made the border out of drywall mud.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdrgns4vr

Apparently we don't teach hyphenation in schools anymore, along with cursive writing.

NAPPV Reunio-n

What's up with the random green squiggles on the pastel poo rounds on Que-enJ's cake?

Red and white flowers for GROUNN
DHOG DAY? Really?

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEsty

Does the first cake say "Nappy Reunio-n"? Nappy might explain things a bit least make some sen-

Linda K.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Not only is Courney an unfortunate name, so is Kirstd!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's called spacing! Why can't they pre-plan their writing before they do it? LOL

check out my blog:

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenter~Nikki~

Maybe these cakes were done on take your child to work day... All of them...maybe...its possible


September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I bet CourTney wishes her name really didn't have that "T" in the middle... then this cake would have been PERFECT...


September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMags

OK...Happybirth day is the same thing as saying, Happy Labor Day to someone who's pregnant. You know, "Have a happybirth!"

The rest of it, I'll just have to sing:

...Handwriting horrors, what did that say?
Leaning tiers to ruin your wedding day.
Mickey Mouse, flash drive, not enough space,
Carrot jockeys all over the place.

....celebrity creepy, letters not straight,
What did you expect, he's not the
Ace of Cakes!

We will, we will wreck you!
We will, we will wreck you!

Sharon's Edible Art

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

Yup. It's a stragedy all right. :)

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

Okay, we need to have this awful cakes being made so that we have this wonderful site. But how can any bakery let those WREAKS out of the backroom let alone out the main door. Golly how can they keep their jobs, are there no bosses overseeing the work. Oh well, its sure gives us fans a great laught to start the day. Thank-you!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPamela

I love this blog. I've lurked forever. Thought about posting 100 times, but never did. My extreme passion for cake has now taken over...

Everything about Queen J's cake has me clawing my face skin off. Beginning to end! From whipping "icing" to horrid candle placement and color coordination! I'm also willing to bet it started with a yellow cake.

I've never said this about a cake before...I don't want to eat it. I want to KILL it!!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPurple Hiccups

@ drgns4vr: You're right, the icing does look like drywall mud! Mmmmmm, chalky.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPersephone

"Strategery" - heh heh. Thank you, Will Ferrell, for that one. (For those that don't know, look up his old SNL skit as Dubya).

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterVicki

I like the toxic green ooze coming from the "balloons" on the Queen J cake... it kind of drew my eyes away from the horrible handwriting.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

happy birthday courney?? thats hilarious.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

OMG, what is that weird green snaky-looking worm-ish thing on the second cake? eeeeeeeek!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlizzied

Happy Grounn Dhog Day?

Don't ice angry!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKristi

Strategery is one of my favorite SNL words/skits ever. Strategery + Cake Wrecks = one great combo!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKelly

I laughed so hard at this I spilled hot tea all over my lap! Genius!! -Jenn

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Rob W.: Your leeches comment made me LOL!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDesertHeather

This isn't really related to today's post, but it is very related to Cake Wrecks.

Today's weather forecast: Mostly cloudy with scattered sprinkles...

Oh, no, not the dreaded scattered sprinkles.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLizziebeth

It occurs to me that all of these cakes could have been fixed with smaller lettering. :P

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDakota

hmmm, I thought I was the only person on earth who actively celebrates Groundhog Day... I mean... Grounn Dhog Day...

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterT

I used to love getting hand made with love greeting cards from my 5 year old just like this. Maybe bakeries are now dropping cakes off at the nearest kindergaarten for that final touch. In fact some of the previous posts confirm this - including dropping off....

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I bet they just spaced that horrible cookie cake's wording that way to distract from their inability to spell Courtney. It was camouflage. Yeah, that's it.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCourt

I feel bad for Que-enJ, Kirstd, and Courney. Those names must have consequences that reach much further than cake.

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMaura

I saw a cake for you guys today but I didn't have a camera with me. FAIL for me. WIN for Boys & Girls Clubs of Grand Rapids since they got a nice cake dripping with caramel. I mean a white cake with a FLOW of caramel on it-- like a brown glacier leaving an irregular dent in the cake on its way to flowing over the sides and SQUISHING AGAINST THE PLASTIC COVER. That much caramel... on a white cake with little white dollops. ...why?!?!

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFysh Phoenix--

people who write like me should not be decorators

September 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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