My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

We Sorry, You Are Living

And because we've seen your haircut, you will be Miss.




Sorry, Dannielle L., but I must be living.

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Reader Comments (59)

I never liked Shane anyway.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Love the commentary on this one lol

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda H

I enjoyed this way too much.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMags

Toronto in 4 days!!!
To wreck just one line from the Beatles, the strawberry feels it's clever.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

Twofers for the price of one.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

Great now i'm going to be looking at engrish sites all day. With the fire extinguishers labeled as hand grenades, the signs warning me to beware of missing feet and directing me to the 'feman's washroom and all that.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEvalis

Cake for a patient who attempted suicide and is now departing the psych ward? With wishes like that, he'll be back soon. Real picker-upper, there!

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterelissa

This is so sad.....I hope at least that the strawberries tasted good.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbassgirl

It was a pleasure seeing you both last night in Boston (Brookline). Thanks for the laughs and best of luck and good health for the balance of your tour!

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commentercc

Fantastic!! Reminds me of the signboard at the local Chinese restaurant: "WE OPEN".

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPam S

Poor Shane. He went in for some "manscaping" and ended up a miss. At least he'll live. Hoping to avoid a lawsuit, the salon opted for the traditional apology cake.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

is this a sorry you survived your surgery/accident/murder attempt cake???
what kind of events do people celebrate these days! here's a miss--cherry sauce to look like blood....

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commenteranonymous

Zombie cakes.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

I wonder if there are any bakeries that hire people with that exceedingly rare combination of piping skills and fluency in the native tongue. My guess is no, which is awesome. More giggles for us!

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle S.

My husband's work is doing a potluck today for someone leaving the company. I can just hear this: "Shane's last day of work is on Friday. We should get a cake." "Oh! I'll order it. I know this great Chinese bakery. The cake is fabulous!" I want a cake with whipped cream frosting and chocolate shavings, now.

Love the P.S. It's a frequently referenced quote in our house.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMuria

Good timing for Halloween.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBea

Wait. What? Maybe I don't have enough coffee in me, but I have no idea what this cake is even supposed to say. It sounds like the alligators in Pearls Before Swine.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCeeCee

I'm guessing that should've said we are sorry you are leaving... but it's SO much funnier this way and in time for Halloween too. @ Fluffy Cow, I was also thinking of Zombies. Perhaps some "Shane" of the Dead?

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterswimmybean

English as a second language. Please let that be the reason for this. Please, I can't bear any other excuse.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMary Connealy

WTF was it trying to say?!?!?!?! I can't even imsgine D:

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMINDY1

I hope Shane got a laugh out of it.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

An anonymous commenter wrote:
"is this a sorry you survived your surgery/accident/murder attempt cake???"

Ooh, this gives me a great idea for a novel/short story! Someone delivers this cake (or a similar one) to an intended victim, only instead of "you will be miss", it says "we missed", or "next time, we won't miss"

Hmmmm.... the possibilities... need to work out a few more details...

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbelphebe

"You will be miss." Miss what? Congeniality??

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterVal

Perhaps Ego Leonard was the wreckorator?

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

Zombie cake for someone who has just discovered he's alive.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Comb beck, Shane!

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

Is this how they break good news in hospitals now? He pulled through the anaesthetic AND the sex change was a success!

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

oooohhhh, zoomom!! your best yet!!

this cannot be a zombie cake, btw. no body parts. just sayin'.

what has two heads & three arms? no, not Zaphod, but a happy zombie!!

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

Poor Shane... Does this mean he is now Shanita?

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKim

It's not only the baker's fault. Don't forget the receptionist who wrote it out this way. Although, yeah, it is super sad that the piper never questioned it. Do you get fired if you call the client to ask "is it really supposed to say this"?

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDeborah R.

ha ha! That is so excellent!

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterameyfm

All your base! This is why I love your blog!

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

This was so perfect for me today :) I homeschool and my 9 year old son has been giving me a hard time about practicing spelling words matter what I tell him he thinks having words just a little off wont matter later in life. Well, I LOL at this one and he came running, read the cake, realized the mistake on his own and said 'I'm glad that wasnt me that made that mistake!' We laughed about it and I think it may have clicked in. Thanks for a good laugh!

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKathy

I am guessing they were supposed to put You are MOVING. You will be missed.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commentersheila anderson

Giggling outloud in the cafe

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLarisa

Words me fail.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBerk

Meh, "leaving" is to "living" as "fatherhood" is to "faulker satherhood"

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLorrie

I bet this was supposed to be for SHAUN.
Now it all makes sense, right?

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRoben

Just in time for Hallowe'en, a refresher course in "All your _____ are belong to us". Infinite silliness possibilities. Er, Shane, you are loving, come here and
we will mist you.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterunmarried without cake

You have no chance to survive make your time.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjanet2buns

I work with international students so I can hear the accent that would go with the reading of the cake :-)

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCarolin


October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKayna

Okay, so the "All your base are belong to us" must be from something, but other than remembering this line from an old "Foxtrot" comic strip I must admit that I don't know what. Please enlighten me.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRikki

It sucks that you are alive. Oh, and also, you look like a girl.

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAna

All your base is from Portal; love this cake!

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCJ

I was going to say 'one of these strawberries is poison' until I realized that the comma in this specimen changes things ever so slightly.

"We sorry, you are living" could, despite the missing contraction, be an apology in the category 'reports of my death are greatly exaggerated.'

Alas, all of this does not explain the second line. Maybe one of the strawberries contains a potentially-fatal dose of female hormones. [ducks and runs]

October 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Lol! I have a brother in law named Shane. Hmm should I show this to him or not? Lol poor Shane. Is this person in a coma, why are we sorry he's living?? Mean wreckerators.

October 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

@ Rikki and CJ
ALL YOUR BASE is actually a lot older than that.
Wikipedia: "The text comes from the opening cutscene of the 1991 European Sega Mega Drive version of the video game Zero Wing by Toaplan, which was poorly translated from Japanese."
There are many more memorable quotes but that is the most used one. The whole game was poorly translated.
P.S. More geek cakes!!!!!

October 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

"All your base" is not from Portal. These should help:

October 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

As has been mentioned, "All your base..." came from a poorly done translation from Japanese. This likely comes from a Spanish-speaking coworker who is going to when he leaves. The cake looks delicious. The English... could use some work.

October 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDale

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