My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

A Cinderella Story

With all the royal wedding coverage out there, a lot of us girls have been spending this week imagining our own Princess Diaries moment.

Now, I don't know about you guys, but mine goes a little something... like this...

[harpsichord dream sequence music plays]

First, there's a whirlwind romance with the dashing stranger who looks like a cross between Nathan Fillion and Kiefer Sutherland during his Three Musketeers days.

(Awww yeeeeah.)

Next, we sink straight into the Fire Swamp.

No, no, just kidding.

Next we play BioShock together until 2AM.

Later, after dressing up as Venkman and Staypuft for Halloween (I'm Venkman, of course), and confessing our undying love for one another, there's a painfully romantic proposal:

Performed in an inflatable kiddie pool.

"Jen," my dashing prince would say, "Will you be my own Princess Peach?"

To which I would respond, "Are you kidding? Do Vulcans need the Pon Farr?
"(But we are going to Disney for the honeymoon, right?)"

And, BAM! I'm a princess! Next thing you know, I'm living in a castle...

"And over here is your TARDIS closet. As you can see, it is much, MUCH bigger on the inside."

...and wearing pretty princess crowns...

(Modeled after crabby Space Invaders, apparently.)

...and pretty princess dresses...

("Talk about your trunk space, check this action out!")

...and riding my Princess Vespa around...

(Ok, technically this would be a Princess Harley.)

...and...and...wait. You know what? Other than the castle and crown stuff, I've already got my fairy tale ending, complete with BioShock playing, Princess Bride quoting, brownie baking prince. (Love you, Sweetie.)

So I guess I'll just end here by wishing all of you:

I like the short and fluffy ones, myself.

Thanks to today's dream team Debbie B., Anony M., Lisa V., Lisa P., Julia B., Vanessa C., & Stephanie S., who, for the record, never even knew fairies *had* tails.

« Spot The Hidden Mickey | Main | A Royal Affair »

Reader Comments (77)

Twu wuv...

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterlaughingmom

I want a TARDIS closet!

oh, and awesome post as usual

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commentertjbmurph

I don't know if it's my lack of sleep last night or what, but this post definitely had me laughing out loud for real. I'm sure my colleague in the next cube over thought I'd lost it.

It was the crown and the dress that really got me going.

Thank you!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterelissa

The British Monarchy apparently has a Flickr stream. They also have pictures of the wedding cake and McVities Groom Cake. Take a gander at what are sure to be the most Wrecked cake copies in the coming year or two:

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChasmosaur

The thought of all that frosting makes me want to puke a little... >.<

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPeaceLoveandSharpies

OOOH Jen! Your crown and dress are sooooo pretty. I'm tearing up.
Take good care of your fairytail!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Mawage is what bwings us togethaar today...

wv: susions- a blessed union between to Sues (not that there's anything wrong with that.)

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmy'sMom

I don't have much to say (having been up since 4 AM watching said wedding), but my WV is too good to pass up - "buripie"!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterViolaNut


April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDestinie

I just love that in one post you combined:
1) Firefly (or Castle)
2) Three Musketeers
3) Princess Bride
4) Ghostbusters
5) Super Mario Bros.
6) Star Trek
7) Dr. Who
8) Spaceballs
and Bioshock.

You are a female geek after my own heart. (And my fiance would be so proud!)

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHistorian

Too bad about that last close.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

are those pancakes on the Belle cake?

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFran

I'm glad at least one other person got the Spaceballs allusion.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Aladdin! and the princess bride!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

So, John's no Prince Valium, then? :)

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterzombiekim

Ditto what Historian said. I'm so impressed by all the references and digging deep for the Spaceballs one!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdrumnate

What girl doesn't dream of Pokemon headwear and artichoke dresses?

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNYCGirl

If my other half started acting like Venkman I'd have to smack him upside the head. :P

@Fran Those do look like pancakes on the Belle cake, don't they? o.O

Ah, the bonds of holy MOLY!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMorgi

I spy with my little eye some icing smears that look like bullet holes on that Princess Harley cake... I also like how, because it is a combined cake for Jeffrey and Sarah, the wreckerator split it down the not-quite-center with that red and blue piping.

Thanks for the laughs, Jen!


P.S. Here's your sound effect!

It's a harp, but some royalty might indeed prefer the harpsichord. It has a lovely sound too!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKimmery

Great post! My boyfriend once sent me a text saying he'd fight through all the levels of Mario and defeat Bowser to save me. It was the most romantic thing I'd ever heard. Geek love FTW! Maybe one day we'll have our very own fairytail wedding.

And yes, I'd like a TARDIS closet. Or possibly a TARDIS house.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMonica

My friend just sent me an email with pics of the Royal Wedding and mentioned how it was a fairytail wedding. Nice timing!

Also, that dress looks like a giant artichoke. That is NOT the flavor I want to think of when digging into a cake, eww.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

Bahahaha - LOVE the Spaceballs reference. Having been up since the wee hours watching "the" wedding, I was actually quite a bit past that part of the post when I got it. But, I got it!

P.S. I'm too tired to think up something pithy like Chaucher would, by my wv is "gasinar." Maybe someone else can be pithy for me? There's gotta be something in there!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie H

I just can't see a crown in that yellow one. It looks like a dead sheep with its oddly-arranged legs in the air.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJM

Belle's dress looks to me like it's made of tree fungus - right color and everything. Now, as much as I love mushrooms, not sure I want a cake made of them! Then again, that might be one "special" cake!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTheOneOnTheRight

Tardis're my hero

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commenter-Sea Nymph-

I'm sorry - I must protest against crossing Nathan Fillion with ANYONE. He is so yummy all by himself.

That being said, excellent post.

Jeffrey and Sarah's cake appears to be backwards unless Jeffrey's the one into princesses and Sarah's into motorcycles (not that that would be wrong!)

Fairytails, indeed.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEsty

I have nothing clever to say, other than a nod to the word verification.

havic - I don't need to add anything. This is Cake Wrecks, after all.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

This morning, while Twitstalking FedCon XX

for Richard Dean Anderson stuff, I saw someone actually HAS a Tardis closet!

It belongs to this guy, who designed this T-Shirt Wil Wheaton was wearing

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbanlu

I'll never understand why twins should have to share a birthday cake. (Tough enough to have to share your birthday when you're a kid!) I have twin daughters and as far as I'm concerned, the more cake the better!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Is the castle cake a wedding cake? It looks like a wedding cake (going by the cutlery on the table). And the Bride and Groom topper is a pair of dragons. The idea is cute, the execution, not so much.

All I could think of when I saw the first two was "Dear God, what is that thing?!"

Hee! Kiddie pool! Hee!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I was thinking pasta on that dress cake... but after reading the comments I am switching to artichoke. The color and all...

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

WV - skienyab: After eating Belle all by myself, I'll never achieve that skienyab.

Blech! So... Much... Babypoop... Yellow... Icing!!!!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous


I should make the crown one for the lady who always comes in and wants a crown on a cake, which since we don't have any crowns I always have to say no. Maybe that cake would put an end to her asking for crown cakes...

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterColleen

Would it be too creepy if, in my first official comment on Cake Wrecks, I told you that I'm so impressed you managed to fit all of those amazing references into one super hilarious post that I'm convinced we need to be BFF's and buy matching Princess Vespas and hang out all day, every day? Yes? Too creepy? Okay then. Good to know.

wv: polike. Minding your manners with someone you're especially fond of.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterlori

My daughter (6 yrs) saw the first cake and asked "Did they use cauliflower? or is that frosting?"

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterM. Mcgough

Bell so looks like a tree trunk covered in fungus!

~Mikey @ Shabby French Cottage

I almost missed the misspelling of the last cake! I want the space-invader crown and maybe I can marry Darth Vader and we will live happily ever after, in a galaxy far, far away!

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCar Title Loans

I am very glad to see that Wills and Kate's wedding cake is not a wreck! Pics are up on their flickr page! :)

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commenteranonymousrn

#1 Serving this must have resulted in a mess of epic proportions. It seems that the whole concept of the CCC (retentively equal servings, no cutting required, etc) is being gradually buried under amounts of frosting that must soon exceed the weight of the universe.

#2 Ditto #1. "Psst! It's 'Jake', not JaK!" "No problem, I can fix it!"

Do I detect an Emeril reference in the segue to #3?

#4 If the wreckerator had spent just a little more time on it (or some, anyway)...

#5 The artichoke theory isn't bad, but these are lily pads. With pink...blobs. Or split pea soup. With pink blobs.

#6 How cool that Jeffrey and Sarah shared a birthday and were able to be married that day!

#7 Aaand cue Jimmy Durante. I was wondering what today's soundtrack was going to be. (I propose the construction of an Earworm Shelter next to the Bunker(TM). Is there a second?)

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

When I first scrolled down, I only caught the upper half of the Princess Belle cake and was like this isn't that bad....then I scrolled down. It's like someone made her dress out of balogna meat petals. 0_0

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAdorably Dead

I love fairy tails...

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRuth

Oh, dear godmother! The last cake is actually quite pretty and sweet. And sullied by poor spelling. What a crying shame.

That crabby crown cracks me up.


April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I have a six-hoop hoop-skirt, and terrifyingly enough, that Belle skirt is about proportionally correct.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCat

Princess Bride AND Doctor Who references in the same post? My day has officially been made. Thanks, Jen. :)

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterlivingandthriving

Aladdin quote with Belle picture?! What are you trying to do?!? *brain asplode*

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSam Gamgee

Hellooooooooooooooo the Princess "dress" has to be that full to cover the fairytail...geez...

Love Love Love me some Princess Bride...may have to go home and watch that instead of the DVR'd wedding....

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

That link for Wills and Kate's official cake led to Page Not Found.

All those millions of people must have eaten every last crumb right down to the digital photos.

I didn't know fairies had tails, but maybe they do in fairy tails.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

LOL, awsome post. I'm loving all your nerdiness here. Princess Bride, Star Trek... <3

That crown though... haha, you know what it actually reminds me of? A headcrab from Half Life.

-Meggie O

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm living my fairytale too (no fluffy tails here). Hubby and I have "as you wish" inscribed in our wedding bands, we went to WDW for our honeymoon, and we loved playing Bioshock together (I'm the only one who screamed from time to time). We started playing games with things like Myst and Riven.

April 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

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