My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Up All Night To Get "Lucky"

Ok, guys, I think it's time to go over the "guidelines" again for wishing someone good luck. Sooo...

Well? Are ya, punk?



Rule The First: Pick ONE sentiment and go with it.

It's either "Good Luck" or possibly "Get Lucky." Or, in this case, maybe "Get Lumpy." Heh.

(Anyone else want to stab that giant bump before it scurries away?)


Rule The Second: Watch your handwriting.

Believe it or not, a cursive capital L is the single most difficult letter in the entire known universe to write:

Which is probably why this baker tried for a cursive capital Q instead; sure, it looks bad, but at least it doesn't spell anything embarrassing:

Gentlemen, start your engines.


Of course, even if you nail the L, there's still that pesky U to contend with:


Yowza, "best of suck" and "good lick?" How much dirtier can an innocuous "good luck" cake get?!

I had to ask, didn't I.


Which brings us to:

Rule The Third: Mixing botched cursive letters with printed ones is a sure-fire recipe for disaster.

Hilarious, awkward disaster:

Yeah, Christina. Try not to screw that up.


Thanks to Bethany P., Gail K., Jodee R., Kristine W., Amy S., Tracy M., & Christina W., who would not believe how often I see dirty good luck cakes. Or, ok, maybe you would.

« The Top 12 Cakes To Bring To Your Family Reunion | Main | Sunday Sweets: Wonderland Treats »

Reader Comments (43)

You know... getting a cake like the last one could be a good thing. Pretty sure I wouldn't mind!

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

I have a cold,
I'm feeling off.
Each time I laugh
I start to cough.
Scrolling down
From "luck" to "suck"
I'm hacking up
Some awful guck.
Poor Jennifer! *cough*
I can't draw breath,
This laugh/cough fit
Might be my death.
If I pass out
Reading this post
Here is what
I thought the most:
"Send me flowers
To ease my aches,
Please don't give me
"Good Luck" cakes!"

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

This is the next logical step for generation Y.
When they were children, they bacame accustomed to receiving a trophy simply for showing up at the field. Some, while in preschool, received awards for washing their hands after using the rest room. Others earned an A+ in penmanship even though no one taught them penmanship and they never learned how to write more than three cursive letters. Now they want a cake for the most rudimentary sex acts. Really! When I was young you had to really perform to get a cake. You had to be spectacular!! Not to brag, but I received a few cakes in my day and I had to work for them. I'm exhausted just thinking about it..
I think I'll go get myself a piece of cake.

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

I'm sad. I've never gotten a cake for my efforts like Christina! :'(

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

Wow, were some of these cake recipients doing a stint at the annual porn awards in Las Vegas? If so, then they are quite appropriate.

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodi


July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJoan

1. "Uh, well....I WAS."
2. "Kids? I think I found Gerry Gerbil...."
3. likekkk.. Hoo caresh? Itch the Shuperbowl. Evvrbudeezh iszh prashturd..
4. Cute, and just right for the coming-out party.
5. A baked "day-after-date-night" note?
6. You KNOW that says "LUCK"...(What Jenny-babe knows is none of our beeswax..."credit where credit's due," you know...)
7. I wonder how much prettier/fancier/fresher the cake would've been if Christina'd actually been, oh, I don't know..."awesome"?

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Maybe that last one is in celebration of acquiring a Porn Name...

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

You know, you just *might* want to put a "possibly NSFW" warning on this indeed!

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

I laughed and coughed for quite a space
as I thought of SuBee's x-rated trophy case

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

(Does it seem odd that
when I'm ill
I speak in rhyme
against my will?)

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

Feel better Zoomom!
SuBee ~ o.O

"Way to go" might have worked better on some of these but I've been here long enough to know that they can screw that up too.

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

Cake 1: An activity based upon the book “50 Shades of Naughtiness,” involving the tactile stimulation of one person designated to be “Lucky.”

Cake 2: For Sandy, who was an exemplary “Lucky” in the above mentioned game.

Cake 3: The two balls are a definite give away that this cake refers to a fast, but satisfying entwining, or quck, as defined by the Urban Dictionary….

Cake 4: A pre-event cake for Derek and Andrew who are about to enter the National Tag-team Vacuuming Olympics.

Cake 4: A congratulatory cake for the winner of the little known “Ice Cream Cone Lick-Off” contest (“I Want Sprinkles” Division), who is then crowned “The Emperor of Ice Cream,” in a rather vague homage to Wallace Stevens.

Cake 5: With its sperm balloons…crudely celebrates just what it says….

Cake 6: Same celebration as Cake 5, yet more refined and genteel….with a butterfly symbolizing the metamorphosis to womanhood, accented by the single rose apart from the rest…representing being, in the vernacular of today’s motif, deflowered….

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSkewed View

@zoomom...oh, so funny! well done, well done!!!
@SuBee...I applaud your cake-worthiness! Alas, in my neighborhood we didn't have cake, but rather candy bars....I only got a couple of "Snickers"....'nuff said....

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermel

Cake 2 - I wondered where my hamster had got to...

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

Interestingly enough, my son was learning how to write his name in cursive, and had the pesky u/i problem happen after an L. He and his brother were laughing over the result.

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMuria

SuBee's trophy case -
Best of Breed, Endurance Run,
Miss Congenial.

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

There's a big assumption here that these spellings were unintentional.

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDanny

Ahhh the gutter minds on a monday morning :D thanks for the laughs. These cakes might have been at the porn oscars, if there is such a thing O_o

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Uh.... Jen? Maybe you should put up a " Dirty Language" warning? That last one ...
Well, Maybe I read it wrong. I hope so. 0.o

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSarhath

@ SuBee & Haiku Joy ... *slow golf clap*.

It's amazing that I don't go through more pairs of contacts than I do with the amount of tears I cry in laughter over the cakes, but even more so over the comments you clever, clever, deliciously wicked, wonderful Wrecky Minions share with us lucky enough to visit this site daily!

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMovieMom

@SuBee: can't be all THAT exhausted if you're going after more "cake"...!
@mel: ("I only got a couple of "Snickers" ") That's a sad story! I'm curious, though. Did they at least "unwrap" them for you first?

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

@SuBee - You vixen! ;)

@mel - I'd rather get a Snickers than a Three Musketeers. All for one and one for all...if you know what I mean.

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSaraV

#2 Bump? Meh. Possible large hair in lower right corner? Hurk.

SuBee, I know what you mean. About kids and awards, that is. Oy. What I consider to be the definitive statement on 'award inflation' is found in "The Incredibles", where Bob & Helen are having a rather heated er, 'discussion' about Dash's 'graduation' from 4th grade to 5th. Plus the anti-egalitarian point made throughout the movie that over-hyping achievement is actually a subtle way of denigrating it.

As for the rest of the cakes, two things: 1. If the message you want on your cake can possibly be morphed into some sort of innuendo, stay well away from the Bevis Bakery. Heh. Heh heh. B. What, no Fireman Cake reference?

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I think the receivers of these cakes were (Daft) Punk'd!

@zoomom - Feel better soon! (Maybe the drugs are contributing to the rhyming abilities?)
@SuBee & @HaikuJoy - LOL!! Well done!
@mel - no worries, we still love ya!

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

@SuBee:("Now they want a cake for the most rudimentary sex acts. I'm exhausted just thinking about it..
I think I'll go get myself a piece of cake.")
Well, how about sex for the most rudimentary cake? How about sex ON a cake? Which is worse/better? Do we even care? Can we really have our cake and eat it, too? And if so, would it be before or after the sex? So many questions~~so little time! I don't know how you can just gallivant off after cake with all of these weighty problems to ponder and/or solve. How flighty!

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Maybe, just maybe, they're putting the flotsam *in* the icing now, instead of just on top. If only Sandy could be so lucky!

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPennyMae

@Craig:"Possible large hair in lower right corner? " Hair, my ASS! I'm telling you that lump is a mouse--so it stands to reason (or my version of it) that your so-called "hair" is, in actuality, the TAIL of said mouse. The poor little critter got caught in the mixer at the bakery and ended up in that cake.The tail ended up on one side and the body on the other.That's my story and it would stand up in court if it wasn't dead (and still had a leg to stand on)!
=^e.e^= ¡Ay, caramba!" (You wanna take it outside? We can TAKE it outside! Go on! If I'm not out in five, start without me.)

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

You never fail to make me laugh. Holy crap, these are hilarious. Best of suck to you. :)

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterWonkafonka

@SaraV: Seriously? You'd rather have one than three at once? I've never tried it, but it does, like you'd get awfully full, awfully fast. So, yeah~I guess one's quite enough.
=^e.e^= Don't you look at me that way! You know darn well that I'm talking about Snickers!! [The CANDY BAR, you fool, not the CLOWN!]

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

@zoomom: made me laugh...a lot...
@SuBee: thank you for helping me understand the phrase "takes the cake"...

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSir Laffsalot

This thread is USELESS without Christina's phone number.



July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterkhereva

@zoomom-I had that cough a couple of weeks ago and I couldn't rhyme anything. I'm very, very jealous.
@mel-I'm sure you deserved cake!!
@sendingintheclowns- I refuse to feel guilty about my cake eating past. I do feel bad, however, about NOT being flighty. I think it was all that cake.
@Haiku Joy-Thank you. I am honored to have my own haiku. I'm going to hang a copy in my trophy case!

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

I read this whole thing with fingers crossed:

please don't let there be a Falkor cake, please don't let there be a Falkor cake...

yup, much relief to reach the end!

zoomom wins the interwebs

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

Laughing out loud for the first time in a long time - your captions - this post - oh dear goodness handwriting teachers look away now and spare your precious eyes.

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

@sendingtheclowns -- no...we always kept our Snickers wrapped...
@SaraV -- didn't think of're right!
@lisadh --'s nice to be accepted...even with my shortcomings....
@SuBee -- if I did, it probably would have been a Ho-Ho.....and only one, at that....

July 29, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermel

That Christina cake was so pretty too lol. Heck I would still eat it and pretend it said luck on it but I would be quietly snickering as I did. Wow just plain wow. If they couldn't see what those L's looked like the wreckerators are either blind or messing with people. Probably both.

July 30, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

The next time I make a cake, no matter who it's for or what it's about, I swear to Bowie, it's gonna say "Best of Suck and Good Lick!" No one will get it but me, laughing my ass off in the corner, but I'm used to it. Besides, the weird, befuddled look on people's faces when they read an in-joke they don't get is often even funnier than the in-joke itself.

I make my own fun. Sprinkle me with water, and I make my own gravy.

Your Pal,


July 30, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStorm

Great, now I can't get that damn Daft Punk song out of my head!

July 30, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

Did anyone else read #3 as "Strumpets: stop arguing!" No? Ok nevermind.

Gee -- the comments went quickly into the gutter this morning, didn't they? I'm not complaining; just observing.

July 30, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

I live in Germany. Cake #6 says "Good Fick Jennifer". Fick is German for f**k. I laughed out loud even more than usual. After a hard day's work I visit this site and laugh myself silly. Keep up the good work!

Brigham from Germany

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBrigham

Maureen -- Yes.

Also I really love that "Good Lick" has that perfect star sprinkle to dot the "i." Hehe.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKiwi

Cake wrecks plus Daft Punk= Best. Post. Ever.

September 28, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJane

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