[howling wind and dog together]
[plus a sprinkling of light rattling chains]
Darkness falls across the land...
The fowl-est stench is in the air...
The FUNK of forty thousand years!
Give or take an eon.
And Grizzly ghouls from EVERY tomb...
Are closing in...to seal your DOOM.
And though you fight to stay alive...
"Ha. Ha. Ha. Ha. I'm missin'myarm, and whereismyface?"
Your body starts to SHIVER.
(Or maybe that's Orlando Bloom. Hm? LADIES?)
For no MERE MORTAL can resist...
... David Caruso riding a unicorn under a double rainbow!
(Oh. Or that)
Is that supposed to be steak?
Thanks to Melinda M., Sarah C., Natasha, Nell H., John M., Rebecca J., Carrie, Robin L., Wolfie, and P. Humperdink for saving us from having to find a cake for "y'alls neighborhood."