It's National "Write A Letter Of Appreciation" Week, so let's take a moment to address those who make all of this possible: the bakers.
[cues sappy violin music]
[turns to face camera]
[looks very, very sincere]
Thank you, Bakery Wreckerator, for making every chocolate swirl look like poo:
For making cupcake cakes (patooie!) look more like ding-dongs:
For your consistent, unrealistic, and yet kind of awesome boob-to-belly ratios:
Dream on, Mama.
Thank you for never, EVER, calling to double check an order:
...especially when you can just slap a question mark on the end and call it good.
Thank you for standing firm in your belief that this is how to spell "birthday:"
Whatever. It's not like you'll need to use that word much, anyway.
But most of all, Bakery Wreckerator, we want to thank you for that big smiling face:
It's literally the best.
And thanks also to Griffin, Robert W., Samantha G., Dave, Heather S., Ivy W., Lisa B., Stefanie F., & Anony M., who, out of alllll our wreckporters, are literally the most recent.