My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Taste The Rainbow

[gazing dramatically into distance]  

Sooome... WHERE.... oooover the rainbow!

My, oh my.


There's a cake that I heard of

Once that I'd like to buy.


Some... ONE... spelled out the colors!


Chris is "blue."


Why... did... the wreck-er-a-tor

Pipe the instructions, too?


Someday I'll get into my car
And drive until the wrecks are far behind me!

("Scarlett around the Edge")


Where "banquet"'s spelled right in the shops

And no one tries to sell cake flops

That's where yooouuu'll FIIINNND me!


Some... WHERE... ooover the rainbow

Bakers try.


They... don't... write out instructions

Those are the cakes I'll buy.


If happy customers can buy

Cakes with a "rainbow"
why ooohh whyyyy
caaaaan't I?


Thanks to Tristan S., Vern M., Tim L., Debi G., Sarah B., David H., Brenda T., Karen B., Stephanie D., and Sahara H. for really bringing the house down.


Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot:

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Reader Comments (11)

Great work Jen! Did you know "Write Happy Birthday in Purple" fits perfectly in the song? I missed the wreck-er-a-tor line, and just kept singing. But you did that on purpose, didn't you? ;-)

February 22, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterAngelaS

I realize Banquet is spelled wrong, but the Blue and Gold part was actually meant to be on that cake, it's the name of the annual Cub Scout celebration.

February 22, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

Concerning these bakers - "If they only had a brain!"

February 22, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterMike

How on earth do I beat that? I feel like my job has been done. Okay, let's go literary.
I shall call this sonnet pair: Petrarch and Shakespeare fight over cake wrecks.


Alas! My duck instructions have been piped
Upon the shiny buttercream of woe.
In pink, poor Holly has her name below
Some swirly things that I would like to wipe.
Those colours surely are not red and white
Or even blue! One side is black, you know.
I think there's something wrong with that rainbow.
The rose cake sure looks poised to pick a fight.
But there between the letters I can't read
And 2013's plea for blue and gold,
There might just be some humour for a tonic.
For surely bakers choose the words they heed
And we all know the best jokes don't grow old.
So surely all these cakes must be ironic!


What Petrarch missed among his chosen cakes
Was simply that the commentary is true.
They're all professionals, for goodness sake!
There is no way that they're playing tricks on you.
They made Chris blue and check out those green "roses".
(Not that the yellow one would win a prize)
Those wrecks are all delib'rate, he supposes.
I think he needs to blink and rub his eyes.
Check out what bakers did to poor old Tristan
And then take in "congratulations red".
If it was for "That 70s Show", they missed 'im,
And now it's landed on Jen's blog instead.
But now I bid you all "adieu! Good luck!"
Am I the only one scared of that duck?

February 22, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterSomeone New

I call that last mangling of the rainbow "artistic spectrum disorder".

February 22, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterChristopher

I can totally see using plaques for 'congratulations' and 'graduate'. We all know what happens whenever those words appear on the same cake. But THOSE plaques?

February 22, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterMorag

Dark Wing Duck? Duck Dread? Dreadnought? Who knew baking could be so perplexing?

February 22, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea Morris

@Mike, I think they do have a brain, and they kept it in a jar on their work table 🙃

February 22, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterNick Meta

Bon voyage, red, white, and blue... now only yellow and black remain.

February 22, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterLacey

Lmao!! These are great..just feel bad for the ones that bought em lol.

February 23, 2019 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

Both the original post and Someone New's Shakespeare are brilliant!

February 23, 2019 | Unregistered Commenterwendelenn

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