My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

It's In There

Sometimes you readers ask, "Yes, but don't they TASTE good?"

Honestly? No idea. And with this blog being about purely visual gags, I'm sure most of you - like me - don't really care what the wrecks taste like.

However, a few of our readers have discovered that, sometimes, the true Wreck can be found on the inside:

There's more than one way to level a cake.
(Pass the icing, Beth D.)

Still - and here's a little foreshadowing for you - at least everything there is edible.

Heheh. Aheh. Heh.

Oh, yes.


Not to be cutting, but finding scissors in your birthday cake is shear madness!

Poor Amy L.; the store accused her of planting these in the cake herself. And really, you can see why; just look at all the fame and fortune she's acquired since!

(That was sarcasm, y'all; she didn't get anything.)

Here's a tip from Bella, the good sport:

Even a cake this yummalicious...


...can be wrecked when you forget to remove the parchment paper.

Well, we all need more fiber in our diets, right, Bella?

And really, it could have been worse. It could have been someone's wedding cake...

..and the paper could have been so thick that the caterers couldn't cut through it, resulting in messy globs of red velvet cake which they had to scoop onto plates to serve. And it could have cost $500.

Yep, that would definitely have been worse. Right, Stacey F.?

(Sorry I don't have a pic of the inside - but then, the outside's not so great either, is it?)

So, my dear Wreckies, the next time you're in the market for a cake, remember: looks aren't everything. Oh, and if you're in need of some craft supplies, you might just get lucky. (Fingers crossed!)

- Related Wreckage: Wrecks on Display

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Reader Comments (94)

These are more depressing to me than the ugly-on-the-outside ones. At least those probably taste good and don't have anything wrong with them on the inside.
Messing with the taste and whatnot is wrong.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

It's Mardi Gras for everyone!!!

*Thinking plastic babies aren't so bad anymore*

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

One question: in what step of the cake making process are scissors required to be so close in proximity that they could so easily get swept up in all the cake-baking madness???

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStacie

I *GASPED* when I saw the scissors cake. That's horrible! I wouldn't be able to eat that cake wondering what other things might have fallen in there undetected. Ew.

Maybe the baker thought that the birthday cake was for someone in the slammer. Then it might have been a happier surprise.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJHill

Is the scissor cake like the Mardi Gras King Cake? Does the person who gets the scissors have to bring the next cake?

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTaylor

Are you serious, there are people selling cakes that look like that. I totally find that offensive. $500.00 for that cake... my goodness.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjennifer_prinz

Scissors in a child's birthday cake? And then the store has the sheer gall to blame it on the woman who bought it? Crazy. They wouldn't be getting my business anymore.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPatty

I don't EVEN want to know how scissors end up inside a cake.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda in Austin

If you spend $500 on a cake it shouldn't be lopsided. Just sayin'.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

something to ponder:
is the last cake a really bad regular cake...or a really bad topsy turvy cake? bottom line...really bad.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteriknow_iknow_iknow

Poor Stacey re: that wedding cake. Personal experience makes me suspect I know the bakery that catered to her special day, but what are the odds of THAT? Pretty good odds, probably, since the attitude I got for my own troubles was, "This cake is expensive! Therefore it is FABULOUS!" Nevermind the only aspect they even came close on was using the right filling. One day, I'll get a protest group together and go stand outside that guy's shop, I swear.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Oh, and if you're in need of some craft supplies, you might just get lucky. (Fingers crossed!)"

Absolutely brilliant, Jen! I do need a pair of scissors....


February 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterara marie

Is the scissors like the king cake? When you find the baby jesus, you're supposed to have good luck that year? when you find the scissors, you're going to cut someone?

About the paper.. something like that happened do my dad once when he did catering. The brides aunt made the cake... in Hawaii... and brought it with her. BEAUTIFUL cake. But because it was traveling from Hawaii... to New Jersey... she used ROYAL. ICING. They used the turkey carver to cut the cake..

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRecoveringActor

Wow, when you get good service, they say you may tell a couple of people. With bad service, it's nine or ten.

Scissors in a cake, which then the store tries to blame on the customer? Tens of thousands! (I would too!) And the BBB, and my attorney...

A little apology goes a long way, America! What are these people thinking??

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

We once had a cake that tasted like palmolive. As in the person washing the bowl for the icing did not rinse so well. I did get my money back when I handed them the cake and told them to try it.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I once found part of a rubber glove in my daughter's birthday cake. Or, rather, she did. When it wound up in her mouth.

She hasn't eaten cake since.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Well, they're all busted now!

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMiranda

I like the icing best - can I please have a slice of the top one?

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Next time I can't find my scissors, I guess I'll look in the cake.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

I can deal with everything but the scissors Yikes!

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLauren Borquez

Just one more comment:

Red Velvet wedding cake? Bleah.

WV: nolath. At least there was no lath in the cake.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

since i'm a total icing addict, that first cake is the best! i've always thought the icing should be thicker than the actual cake.

shaking my head at the scissors in the cake wreck. not sure why, but the "pants on the ground" song/rap comes to mind:

scissors in the cake
scissors in the cake
lookin' like a fool
with yo scissors in the cake.

sorry. my mind is a terrible thing. :-)

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTerry Lee

@ Gary - our wedding cake top was red velvet and it was FABULOUS! Don't poo poo what you haven't tried!

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStacey

I made my niece's 1st birthday cake and very nearly made the smash cake with a Wilton flower nail stuck inside (I had unknowingly set the cake on top of the nail on the cutting board). I did find it before I iced the cake, but I could just imagine if the baby had reached into her cake and pulled out a metal spike!

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBethL

The first cake looks like a dream come true to me! I've always loved a little cake under my icing!

And regarding the second cake, well, haven't surgeons been known to make the same mistake?

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJeanette

Oh man! The scissors cake - bad, bad, bad! I'd have been LIVID to be accused by the bakery of planting them in the cake myself! Oh my goodness.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

My parents' wedding cake had not parchment paper but a layer of think cardboard between the top of the cake and the icing. Apparently it was quite comical watching them try to cut through the cardboard. Unfortunately I've never seen pictures, only heard the story.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRue

Too bad I don't have pictures. My wedding cake had cardboard *under* the fondant to provide structural support for the upper layers rather than countersunk dowels. Of course the cake fell over. And of course the baker maintained that it wasn't his fault.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJoanD

Cripes! Those scissors could be evidence from a crime! Let's hope they weren't used to stab someone...

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I need scissors!!!! 61

Sorry I just had to do that!

The ones with the parchment paper remind me of something in the Good Eats episode about the coconut cake. Alton brown is putting together the coconut layer cake and as he pulls off the parchment he make a yuck face then says, "never forget to take that off...ever."

On the subject of a King Cake, they are suppose to have something hidden inside them so that isn't really that bad. If you are expecting the plastic baby inside it means you won't usually end up eating it my mistake. A pair of scissors inside a cake is much more worrisome. Not only is it not likely to be clean it is also sharp.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDan Bradbury

Wow. Scissors and other hardward I would expect to find in those autopsy cakes. *DO NOT* want to find paper in colon/intestinal cakes.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermsyendor

The top cake was my birthday cake from a year ago. And while it might seem like all that icing was great, it wasn't. The cake underneath it wasn't cooked properly. No amount of icing can make up for that...

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterB. F. D.


I wouldn't want to be to the one who finds a rock in my cake!

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commenter5thsister

@Joan D.... I am seething with anger on your behalf.

A shop I worked at for a short time tried to pull the same tactic as cake #1. It was some young chick that didn't care, until I called in three other people to look at what she was doing and then she finally had the grace to admit it was awful.

As far as the scissors cake, I would have kept the scissors in the cake for the photo, and then photographed the scissor-shaped impression that they left in the cake. I can't believe the store tried to say she was lying. She should blow up that photo and stand next to their bakery counter.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTheUnlikelyTriathlete

Now I wish you'd tell us which bakery the scissor cake was so we can all avoid it.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdeckardcanine

I wish I had taken a picture of the grocery-store cake we had last week. Its wreckage would have fit in perfectly here. This abomination was iced in BOTH whipped topping (the bain of my cake-loving existence) THEN butter cream! You're not fooling me, RITE-SHOP (some names have been changed to product the guilty). Just to verify this wreckage, I checked the packaging. There is a distinctive 'Buttercream' sticker on the top, clearly an afterthought. BUT on the side, the actual bakery tag said "Marble Whipped" which had been conveniently partially covered by the PAID sticker.
I could tell by just looking at the slice I had that the icing was a WRECK! RUINED buttercream!! gah-ross.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRobin Buttercream-lover

I made a totally unprofessional-looking cake for my daughter's birthday a couple of weeks ago, but that's okay, since I don't claim to be a professional. But I DID almost leave the parchment pan liner on the bottom of the cake layer--fortunately my husband was helping me assemble the layers and noticed before we plopped it onto the frosted/filled bottom piece. So I can totally see how that might happen. I must say, though, the cake tasted very yummy and the 9-year old girls loved that it was totally encased in sprinkles!

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle in Orygun

Yah know if they had to throw something in a cake, i would be glad it is a huge scissors and not say small screws or hairs or needles or tooth picks.

Cripes someones kids could get really hurt.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermoo bunny

No way in HELL is that wedding cake worth $500.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMe Two

Maybe the scissors cake was really meant for a convict in prison? I mean who would suspect the child's birthday cake?

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNewsCat

"B. F. D. said...
The top cake was my birthday cake from a year ago. And while it might seem like all that icing was great, it wasn't. The cake underneath it wasn't cooked properly. No amount of icing can make up for that..."

I really feel for you there. Man that 'cake' doesn't look like it would have made a good pancake. In fact I've seen pancakes thicker then it! That is terrible that they tried to sell you a cake that fell in the oven! That is just inexcusable.

Last Friday I actually took part in preventing a cake wreck. I was at the supermarket getting something else at the bakery when a woman asked to have something written on the cake. The person at the bakery(it was after 7) was not the cake decorator and didn't actually do the writing on the cake but handed the woman the piping bag to write what she wanted on the cake herself. She was struggling to even hold the bag right to get the frasting to even come out let alone write on the cake. I came over and offered to help and when I picked up the bag and gave it a quick twist and started writning the looked at me and asked. "how can you do that so easily?" I replied, "Lots of practice." I wrote what she wanted on the cake very neatly and with a smile she was on her way and I went back to my business(getting cake boards to put the cakes I make myself on)

So here is a really good tip cake lovers, don't go to get the cake late in the day as no one actually competent is going to be there.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDan Bradbury

Wow, the frosting on that first cake approaches CCC proportions!

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Black Dog

My mom and I once made a cake that was intentionally inedible. The birthday was for the only man in her office and he was a National Guard Reservist on some weekends. We took a 3 inch thick piece of couch cushion foam the size of a sheet cake and frosted it. It was all in camo with a river through the middle and little plastic army guys fighting their way across the cake (we cut one in half to make him look like he was swimming across the river). It was lovely! Took it to work, lit the candles, samg happy birthday (with bagpipe accompaniment), then handed him the knife to cut the cake. He put the knife in and tried to cut down, and it just went ::sproing:: and popped right back up. He looks around at all of us smiling, says "heh heh.." like he meant to do that, and tries again. He took several stabs at it before scraping back some of the icing and realizing that he had been HAD. We all laughed and brought out a real cake. He refused to even try cutting it. Sometimes a horrible cake can be really funny!

WV: rembo = rembo to check your cake carefully!

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterVanessa

I hope these people get their money back.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterangie and tyler

RE the scissors cake: name and shame, seriously.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHelen Hunter-Boyle

This is why I don't eat cake for breakfast anymore... even if it looks like a deflated pancake with icing on top. (My bum thanks you, though.)

But with the whe whole scissors in the cake thing, and then blaming it on the woman? WRONG, WRONG WRONG!

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTatersmama

Ah, this reminds me of a birthday where I was visiting family in Florida and they always got their cakes and things from this fantastic bakery. Every time I had tried the really good fudge cake before, it was fantastic and so since we were visiting for my birthday that's what they got me.

It was all fine and good until we discovered a layer of parchment paper just underneath the chocolate icing. Talk about a messy ordeal.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterManda

On my Mother's 50'th birthday I couldn't find the time to bake her a cake so I went to the bakery and ordered one. When we cut it open, there was a HUGE bubble in the cake, making a chasm the size of two fists. I took a picture and bought it with me to the bakery and requested they give me 30% of the money back for the missing cake I didn't receive though I paid for. They didn't give me any money back, but I did get a free CCC of my choice. Bastards.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKate in Italy

I'm curious how the heck a pair of scissors got into a cake without anyone noticing (or DID they?). It's definitely a health code violation.

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@Kate in Italy @ 3:59...

Funniest post today, you made me laugh out loud :) Bastards!

wv vifib: I'd have gone into vifib if I ever found scissors in my cake! Be still my heart!

February 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCaren

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