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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Nov022011

Deep Breaths

After yesterday's Baby Blue fiasco, I think we all could use a nice, relaxing post. Something safe, easy, and appetizing. Something that brings to mind happy places...

 ...and happy things.

 So clear your minds, my friends, and let's think about happy little butterflies...

 And cheeky little monkeys...

 And sleepy little kittens...

 And warm, friendly faces...

 And, of course, giant, chocolate-dipped beetles:

See? All better.

 

Thanks to Claudia D., Dawna Z., Kimberly S., Tiffany, Lisa H., Brittany J., & D.L. for the breather.

« Wrecky Replay - The Apostrophe is Silent | Main | You Remind Me of the Babe »

Reader Comments (64)

Oh yeah, I'm feeling so much better after those bugs on the top of the cake.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAddie

Too funny! I just watched an old Alfred Hitchcock Hour episode called "The Jar" and that's what the next to the last photo reminds me of!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJan

Just so you know... I DID dream about that blue baby cake last night!! I'll be sending you the therapy bills, yes?? :)

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

oh lord. Tell me the beetles aren't real. Please?

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterlizdini

I feel so much better already! My first laugh of the day. Thank you.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterwreckerator extraordinaire

Thanks Jen. I really love when the Durf's up. Beer, tequila and shame reminds me of happy memories (I think) from my teen years, and giant chocolate-dipped beetles makes me want to have a spa day.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNikki

Shrieeeeeeek!!! There is no place you could cut into that KITTEN that would be acceptable!!!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBea

HA ha ha ha ha!!!! Better indeed!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Those wouldn't, by any chance, be dung beetles, would they?

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

easy to see what happened in the first one - 'd' is right next to 's' on the keyboard.
second one summarizes those parties i think i went to in university fairly well - my recollection's a bit fuzzy though
Rest are pretty standard wreckage... till the beetles. I'm reminded of a quote - "Living is easy with eyes closed." - The Beatles

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEvalis

I think those bugs are dung beetles...

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDonkaloosa

Beer, Tequila and Shame at 18????? Aw darn, I had to wait until 21 to do it legally. :( Not fair!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermiss_paper

Has the kitten got two heads? I think it has two heads. TWO HEADS, people!!!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJoan

Next-to-last pic: ALOT OF CAKE!
(Explanation here: http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html)

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commenteremor

I'd rather eat the beetles than the body on the butterfly. . .

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterOldish Lady

Actually, those beetles (kuwagata-mushi and kabuto-mushi) are coveted pets here in Japan, and that birthday cake probably made some kid really happy. It is a gorgeous cake if you are into bugs!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbusaikko

I must be slow. I thought the first one said "Drury" and it took me almost a minute for it to hit me what it was SUPPOSED to say!!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

Much as this makes me want to rewrite "My Favorite Things", I'll give you a break today and restrain myself.
It was fantastic meeting you both last night Jen and John. I just wish I could have stayed and chatted with you all night. If you find yourself with a few spare hours today (It's not like you have a schedule or anything, right?) I'd love to see you again before you leave the country. What do you say to dinner at my house?

Also, unrelated to today's post, I just want to point out what possessed me write those terrible wrecky versions of otherwise harmless songs over the past week or so, and I'm going to do that with some assistance from The Beach Boys:

Barbara Anne, a Cake Wrecks fan,
Barbara Anne
Got me a-wreckin’ and a-rhymin’
Stretchin’ to match timin’
Barbara Anne (Bar Bar, Bar Barbara Anne)
Songs in my head blare, I knew I had to share,
When Barbara Anne issued me a double dog dare
Barbara Anne…

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

So...not...helping O_o

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMINDY1

Please tell me those chocolate bugs are made from a mold. Otherwise, judging from the size scale of the strawberries...those are GIANT bugs! And I really don't want to live in a world where insects are that big.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLynne

I see a new t-shirt... "DURF'S UP!!!"

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

Ok, durf's up looks like a beach that needs a cleanup! oil slick in the water, environmental hazard on the shore that buried those hapless surfers....unless it was the water (reminds me of a Stephen King short story I read way back....)

that butterfly is disturbing. the poo body, the wrinkled spraypainted wings....

freaky monkey scares me.

I just read Edgar Allan Poe's "The Black Cat"--so that weepy "kitten" is freaking me out!

is that next one really a face? or maybe the mutant multi-colored mother of the pacman ghosts??

aren't real beetles a specialty in the middle east? yuck. crunchy. and the one looks like it's flipping the bird....

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commenteranonymous

How exactly is that a kitten?

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFM

OK...I *like* the beetle cake and would be pleased to be the recipient of something like that.

(Why yes, I am a bit odd.)

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterbansidhe

Beer, Tequila and Shame was for my son's 18th b-day. We live in Alberta, Canada and the drinking age is 18 here :)
The morning after his 18th b-day we were all sitting around having coffee and he smelled his hockey jersey which he wore out the night before. I asked him what the heck it smelled like and he said "Beer, tequila and shame", so naturally that needed to go on his cake.
The decorator didn't even flinch when I asked for this, a pretty typical request I guess :)

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDawnaZ

Beer, Tequila & Shame AND giant beetles? My kind of party! Durf's up!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

The beetles are actually awesome! I wonder if they're solid chocolate.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAlison

I have this image from Mythbusters stuck in my head of those beetles hitting a board simulating the effect of the bug hitting a motorcyclist at 65 mph. That was the one that actually could kill a person.

After that, not so sure I'm looking for cake. Mad skills, though, on whomever created them. Do we have a translation of the cake's inscription?

As usual, you have provided a good laugh to begin the day. Thank you.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDi

Raising stag beetles is a very popular hobby for Japanese kids. In former times it might even mean some kind of growing up ritual, as the boy had to take care of the very slowly developing animal. As these were given to him when he slowly started to turn into an adult, they helped him to develop a sense of responsibility for the animals.

He shouldn't eat them on his cake! XD

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHisietari

Um, that butterfly is the most poolicious thing I have ever seen!!!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnita

The "kitten" cake looks more like DEMON KITTENS FROM HELL WILL SLOWLY DESTROY YOU FROM WITHIN.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJules

#1 Looks like the Great Pacific Garbage Patch. (Did I mean the cake generally, or the upper left corner of same? You decide.)

#3 At first, I didn't see the decimal point in the price. I would have moved it one place to the left.

#4 I'm sure the banana placement is purely coincidental. Yeah, that's it.

#5 Awww. A sleepy KITTEN with glow-in-the-dark eyes. Tons of black frosting, Mmmm! What's seeping into the cakeboard?

#7 If those are Goliath beetles, the scale probably is accurate. Congratulations to the person who sculpted those entirely from chocolate with no added 'ingredients'. Right? (Mmmm. Crunchy, with a gooey center.)

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Well at least the beetle cake decorator had some icing skills. Happy birthday is written soooo tiny in Japanese.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermrsblocko

Oh, yeah. I took a nice, deep breath. And then I screamed.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

O.O
*shudders*
*hides under bed*

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSay g'night, Gracie

You have ruined baby blue forever.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDana the Biped

Giant chocolate-dipped beetles... YUM!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMafdet

Are those beetles made from chocolate, or beetles covered in chocolate?

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

BEER, TEQUILA, AND SHAME FOR THE WIN!!

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChristi

At first, I thought the Warm Friendly Faces cake had cinnamon raisin Melba toast stuck on it. I hope not, and that they're at least chocolate chip cookies. That might help in a way. Somehow.

I can't help wondering what future cake wreck will be the first to elicit the comment, "Ugh....this is the Blue Baby Fiasco allllll over."

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterania

I missed the "sleepy little kittens" text, skipped to "And warm, friendly faces..." but read it as warm, friendly FECES, which, considering the wreck, was pretty apropos.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commentervonneybeth

@Donkaloosa - No honey, they're 'Durf Beetles' ; )

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCakeyKerry

#7 is made with beetle juice.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I like those cakes. I'd like to see some more Doctor Who cakes, though. Have you ever watched Sgt. Frog? I think you'd like it. And yes, I know I spelled the Post Author Name wrong.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnomonous

You realize that those beetles have either a cherry or lime gushy center?

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBoyJim

All the animal cakes were scary, but those beetles are HORRIFYING. I screamed a little. In my office - embarassingly enough.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermelissa

Cake #1 should come after Cake #2 because if I ate cake after a night of beer, tequila and shame it would come out looking like that...

And my first thought on the beetles was: "yum, those beetles are solid chocolate! Yay!"
And my second thought only moments later was: 'oh my god, what if they are only chocolate dipped?" and then I was worried that my desk was going to look like cake #1

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLaury

The bug cake makes perfect sense if you've ever lived in Japan. As someone else said, it probably made some little boy's day.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKaitlyne

That is NOT a butterfly. It's a colon, surrounded by baboon asses.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterstarbuck

@ Lynne

I'm afraid that I must let you know that those kinds of bugs do get that big in real life.

Anyway onto the subject of the cakes....


#1: What is a Duys? And why is it up?

#2: Hmmm...so the person just joined a Sorority/Fraternity?

#3: A poo butterfly...[holy grail]yah![/holy grail]

#4: It's staring into my soul...it knows my name!.........AAAH!!!!!

#5: For a Demon Kitten it's not that bad.

#6: Notify Garfield. John has been cooking again! Stop making Creatures that Lived in the Refrigerator, behind the Mayonnaise, next to the Ketchup, and to the Left of the Cole Slaw! There is enough pain in the universe already.

#7: hmmm....Chocolate bugs the same size as the real bugs they are trying to be. Fingers crossed they are just chocolate.

November 2, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

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