So, you're opening a bakery. You've watched too much Cake Boss, opened a few dozen credit card accounts, and "sampled" enough cupcakes to confidently differentiate between "ganache" and "monkey poo."
The window display, of course!
This is your place to shine, aspiring baker! Show the people what you can really do!
I see you're of the "writing on Styrofoam rounds with a Sharpie" skill set.
We can work with that.
After all, the most important thing is getting customers through the door - even if it is only to ask, "Dear God, what IS that THING?!"
Just think of all the gas-mask party favors you could make. Ooh, and festive radioactive warning streamers! Glowing fruit punch? Mushroom cloud side-cakes? Really, the possibilities are endless.
And you can tell by the way that plastic half-lady is smelling her armpit that her plastic whole lady counterparts are gonna be hella sexy.
Hey, how do you think Barbie paid for all those different careers, kids?
And also a strong grasp on the spelling of "ho bag":
Because, really, nothing is worse than a misspelled "ho bag" on your cookie cake.