My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

A Fertile Imagination

Finally, a birthday cake that celebrates the real meaning of birthdays:

(Don't even try to tell me you don't see it.)

And that, boys and girls, is HOW A STAR IS BORN.




Thanks to Lindsay C. for the egg-cellent pregnant pause.

(Hey Lindsay, you think this cake would be hard to reproduce?)

« Two Steps Forward And Three Wrecks Back | Main | Pixie Bust »

Reader Comments (82)

The little sperms look more like mouse butts to me. A very ugly mixture of colors, as well.

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterVal

Maybe it was a baby shower cake? Perhaps intentional? All of those little, flailing unsuccessful sperm at the bottom, surrounding the huge ova? No matter - tasteless and oh so gross. Who wants biology 101 at a baby shower or birthday party??

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLStevens

I didnt see it at took me all of 10 I cant un-see it...

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterlori

@Aliza: Just a friendly mini-EPCOT warning. If Jen says it's a wreck, it's a wreck. The blog has ears. There are people lurking out there, waiting to pounce on innocent questioners of wreckworthiness.

There's a room -- Room 101 -- where they break you down, bit by bit. They even use... [whispered] song. No, I don't know where it is. I just know.

Perhaps I've said too much. They wouldn't fault me for warning someone, right? I'm just trying to help keep someone else from making the mistake I made.

I'll be in the Chestnut Tree Cafe, working on a chess problem.

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Well, I counted 21 of those guys and I counted several times. What do you call a person that is about to be impregnated with 21 babies?

Mom and Dad discussion. Honey he is a boy. It is your turn to talk about the birds and the bees. Well how am I suppose to do that? asks the husband, you have always had "The Talk." I suggest you just be nice, honest and forth comming with your son. Be sensative to his needs. Maybe talk over some cake and Dr. Pepper or something. Oh and you don't have to go into a lot of detail, remember he is only a child and hasn't started puberty just yet. Husband roles eyes, but then "ding" he has a light bulb moment. I know how to do this and not have to say a word. We have a cake, and we have our prop!!!!!

Next day, Wife looks in fridge and sees husband prop "Gasp" maybe I should have done the talk after all. lol

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTerrie

It's like a photo finish but we don't know the winner- my money's on the mauve sperm on the inside rail ;)

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPenny

I too think this is rather cute. Spermatozoids and egg for a bday cake seem to be the perfect choice and timing (when else, really XD)
Not a wreck to me, stupidly funny instead :p

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCyllan

If anyone cares, you CAN buy a plush sperm, if you wanted to ;),4299.html

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLiss

took me a moment. i was checking for an error in spelling.

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered Commentertiny p elephant

@Craig -- Don't make me break out the Barry Manilow...

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTheardare

This one took me a while. Honestly. And then I giggled. Thanks for brightening my day Wreckies!

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJuli

Theardare is back!!

Craig would have made a "killing" today, selling his "un-see machine" as there are quite a few comments about wanting to unsee this post.

I sure hope that some one is compiling a book for Sharyn...all of her songs should be in one!

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEla

(grumbling) wish I was from Wisconsin all of a sudden

@Craig you've said too much and the ninja corps are coming for you RUUUUUNNNNNNN.
P.S. you're lucky Theardare's in a good mood and it's only Manilow...don't ask him about Level II.

Off topic: I was looking at the wonky Hs and the funky stars on top and thought "huh." Squint/head turn. Nuthin'. Started to scroll down to see if there was another hint and "ohohohoh! that's funny!" :D

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

"I don't see....OOHHHH...." :)

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNanci

Ok, what's with the 21 babies people keep talking about? There's ONE big ovum, so there can only be ONE baby. There's always TONS of sperm & may the best ONE sperm win! :-) (No, you can't have multiple winners - the fertilized ovum "locks" the rest of them out.) And yes, these sperm do look a little stunted in body & tail & could just be the back-ends of 21 mice in a purple cheese round.

PS @ Craig - I think it's very polite & neighborly of you to warn the newbies! :-) But don't tell them about 'The PiƱa Colada' song, then the Wreckerators have to ki...oops. Gotta go now... [grabs bo & nun-chuks and melts into the shadows...]

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

@Naomi -- that rightmost purple one is in charge of the de-tails.....

May 23, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermel

Hmm wonders if that cake would be safe to eat lol. I am sure the birthday girl is glad her name is not on the cake..unless this wasn't for a girl then they should really be glad..and relieved. Liked the stars though.

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

What sperm? All I see are tiny little baby mice hiding under the top of the cake. Lots of little baby mice.

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergabsmom

Sorry, I'm not seeing it. The cake is being nibbled to death by cute pink & purple mice, but I can't see what that has to do with the stars. <shrug>

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAA

Beware cats with guns. Thanks, all -- I needed a good laugh.

@Ela, a book is a great idea. John & Jen could go on tour to promote it. Or not... Just kidding, guys!

They know I'm kidding, right?

Oy. Later! [Dives into secret Bunker basement entrance as the thankfully-rare Manilow cover of the Pina Colada Song begins to play.]

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig


Uh oh! I just woke the baby with a snorting laugh. I am SO making this cake for his birthday and see which one of my family members notices first!!!

LOVE IT JEN!!! Keep up the good work....Gotta go, bottle time. :)

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTink

"You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means."

@sharyn, this is a gorgeous instafilk. I've posted a link to this page on the LiveJournal filk community.

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterthnidu

@Craig You know what Room 101 is called, don't you? Yes, of course you do...

Why did I just hear a voice out of nowhere whispering "We will meet in the place where there is no darkness"?

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterthnidu

This cake just made me realize that I learned about fertilization from watching the classic film "Look who's Talking". You know - the opening scene where the sperm race to the egg?! That seriously was my introduction to sex ed.

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKerri

@ Craig... Is it safe to come out of the bunker, yet? Phew, no EPCOTs (KarateLady: I'm actually not a newbie, just more of a lurker than a commenter of late). I think what saved it was that I specified that it's not a wreck to *me*... there's no question that it is actually a wreck! And absolute perfection for this site :)

But you're right, I shouldn't phrase it that way.

I'm debating posting a picture of the cake in my office next to the stress-ball sperm... who says public health can't be fun?

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

Me upon seeing the photo:

"What's so wrong with this cake? I think it's kinda cute, actually. No, it's not the most professional-looking cake I've ever seen, but it's not THAT bad. I mean, the color scheme is kind of nice and I like that the wreckerator didn't try to go beyond his/her abilities. The lettering is legible, and I like the cut-out stars and all the little pink and blue... squiggly... oh. EWW!!!"

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKhymera

@Khymera, now you know why Jen calls the wrecks: Some of them have a delayed effect. You think you've spotted a rare mistake, then...WHAM-O!

The next thing you know, a cadre of henchpersons is encircling you with Hula Hoops and you're having Frisbees thrown at you. Then it's over to the Slip 'n' Slide, where they really get down to business. That's when you realize that up to this point, they've just been toying with you.

May 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I will shamefully admit - when i first saw this on my phone I thought " Hey wait thats not a bad cake why is ahe making fun if it!?" But it didnt take long after clircking on ir to see it... That cake should read Happy Birthday minus 9 months!

May 25, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterhansueter

@KarateLady now, there's a song parody I want to hear! :D

May 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

Well, my *first* thought was that it looked like the cake was dropped on a bunch of pastel colored mice...the 'better mouse trap', perhaps?

(Wonder what that says about my mental health?)

June 8, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarol

lol i thought they were half of a mouse at first i read comments then look at it again after the third time i went ok i see it now. lol.

June 19, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKatrina

I just noticed it's a birthday cake post on my birthday...I actually like this one, it's so...honest :)

October 12, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSheeni

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