My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Meanwhile, at the Unintentionally Erotic Bakery...

"Deb, you've outdone yourself!"

"Aww, thanks, Pat!"

"So, what do you call it?"

"Well, with all the candied cherries on there, I'm thinking...'THE CHERRY POPPIN' CANDY CASTLE!' What do you think?"

"I like it."

"AND, we can throw in a half dozen 'Tunnel of Love' cookies with each order!"

"Oooh, good idea! Especially since no one but those college guys will buy any."

"Yeah...I guess the extra icing must be turning people off - too many calories. Remember how that lady said they weren't family-friendly?"

"That was kind of wierd. Must be one of those health nuts."

"Aw, you know how it is. People are so paranoid about what they put in their mouths these days."


Thanks to Anony M. & Christina P. for the great spread.

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Reader Comments (54)

Much as I would like to feign ignorance...

Sung to "(Let's Get) Physical"

Let's get Freudian, Freudian, It's time to get Freudian, here comes Sigmund Freud again
Just look at that birthday cake, for goodness sake, just look at that birthday cake

And those cookies, ewww. Beribboned, too. For a one year old? Psychotherapy for you.
Just sit down and have a talk, have a talk. Maybe some electroshock.

Let's get Freudian, Freudian, It's time to get Freudian, here comes Sigmund Freud again...

(John, you've spelled weird wrong in the 5th line of dialogue after the cake.)

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

I guess you missed the cupcakes that were literally vaginas... and MEANT to be. I need to find the link and send you a copy. (very well done, I must say, but STILL....)


June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDi

One wonders (after the gaping and the shaking of head have died down) what the cake was supposed to be. It's for a one-year-old. Maybe it's a princess's castle? **Looks Again. More Shaking of Head.** Maybe a stroll down memory lane? "Look, sweetums, just a year ago you were passing through, and look how big you are now!"

**again with the gaping and shaking of head**

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMadeleine Robins

Are people blind to what they are doing?!?!?!?! Or are cakewreck fans just very pervy?!?!?! D:

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Candy Mountain will never be the same.
♪You fill me up with sweet sugary goodness...♪

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSuzieQ

Learn anatomy
through cake, frosting and cookies
Bella won't notice

Oh wow, I just, there are almost no words. While I can forgive the cupcakes, the door to the castle and the cookies are just so blatantly visual representations of various lady-parts that I'm floored Isabella's mom would even consider serving them at a 1 year old's birthday party unless it was some sort of repressed housewife/mom kind of joke like "hey ladies, look what I got for my daughter's birthday and SHE doesn't know what they are but WE do, isn't that a hoot?" When Isabella is in therapy in 16 years for sexual addiction, hopefully mom will know why!

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGrnEyes6

Well at least it will be several years before
Isabella realizes what was wrong with her cake

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAna

I vote for pervy....and i speak from experience.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTor2ga

Can we send these to the Minnesota legislature . . . ?

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStacy G.

I don't mean to be lippy, but this is not what I meant when I asked for a cake box.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

Initially I thought perhaps the cherries on the cupcakes were boobies and thought that was a little below your usual standard, then I noticed the door - oh. Gosh.....was there a wreckorator somewhere in a hot sweat as they stood back and looked in horrified realisation at what they did in all it's glory, hoping desperately that no-one else's mind would go there? Sorry mate, it kind of hits you in the eye...if you'll pardon the turn of phrase.
As to those that's a Valentine's gift that's open to interpretation.....

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

Thank you for the penetrating analysis of this cake. Some may be offended, and we may see their rigid objections inserted here again and again, only to be withdrawn when they come to the conclusion that this cake is a master piece. The “tunnel of love” cookies are not pictured here because they were being made of that special baker’s material, dil-dough, and it takes a little longer for that to rise and bake into its full firmness.

PS – thank goodness the parents had the sense to leave off the traditional birthday “balloons” for this one-year old….

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterlittle boy blue

I think Stacy G. means the Michigan legislature. I'll be happy to deliver it. :)
I am deeply disappointed in my elected officials.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenternewbuffalomom

I say we send cake number 1 to the Michigan state legislature.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEssJayTee

Ok, I have to say, that I didn't see anything wrong with it at first. LOL It took me a minute to see why this was a "not safe for polite company" kind of a post. Maybe I'm just so innocent? ;-) But, once I saw it, I gasped out loud. Good thing I have an office to myself, eh!!

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAshley

Stacy, I think you meant Michigan legislature and yes..they should get these cakes LOL

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKimmy

We Americans are way too prudish. In Europe ALL baked treats have representations of genitalia depicted on them. Grow up, people.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

It's too bad about that cake. Without the doorway and with a nicer airbrush job, it really would've been a cute cake. The cupcakes on top look like perfect little sundaes with their cherries on top. Poor Isabella! The wreckers have started ruining her cakes already!

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenternormajean

if anybody would like a song to go along with these yummy treats, I've rhapsodized here: Plus a picture of those famous V-decorated cupcakes.

I think those ?hearts? on the cookies and bows are perfectly... okay, nice idea, lewd execution.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBeverly Diehl

"Cherry Poppin Candy Castle" for a 1 yr. old's birthday cake? Cakewrecks: what has brought you to this lowly place?

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergabsmom

Why vajazzle when you can have cookies and cake that are sparkley and decorated? No waxing required...

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie

Stacy G., I love you.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterelissa

Can we send these to the Minnesota legislature . . . ?
June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStacy G.


June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterThatDeborahGirl

I loved the post today. I NEEDED the laugh as I am having a hard time with the fact that I am turning 30 today. I love CAKE WRECKS and always hope never to see one of my cakes on here....LOL

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCrystal

Since when is growing up equated with becoming trashy and providing too much information about private anatomy to those who have the right NOT to see/hear it? If I were a member of the Michigan Legislature, I would also refuse to continue listening to a woman who said I was "interested in her vagina." It saddens me that so many women don't know the difference between "liberated" and "trashy." It also saddens me that we spent two days on Father's Day and barely one for our troops. Yep, I'm pretty much done here. Farewell, Cakewrecks.

[Editor's note- Wait. What did we do? I'm honestly confused... -john]

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJM

SuBee, really? ALL the baked treats in Europe? Guess I missed 'em!!!! Poo.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterjoylovefun

Uh...well...I can see it now: Dearest little one, for your first birthday, we wanted to remind you of where you were last year at this time. Remember what it looked like from your point of view? We created a cake that would remind you in case you forgot.

Yeah, that's going to end well.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBeesMom

I think this might be your best song parody yet, Sharyn! :)

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

What really fractures me is that someone was so PROUD of this cake that they hauled out a giant piece of silk, hung it up as a backdrop, and took a formal picture of it.

The thought of even having to cut this thing makes me shudder. Eeewwwww. . . . ..

As for the Michigan legislature: We'd better make sure it's the yummiest chocolate cake on earth under that -- um, decor. Otherwise, we, too will be banned for not meeting the standards of taste. Or decorum.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

We are pervy, indeed, Sharyn! Ain't it fun?! ;-)

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh524

I agree with "gabsmom". Fortunately, no young child looking at these bakery goods will see portions of the female anatomy depicted. Unfortunately, adults' imaginations no longer let us see the innocence in things, because we've been exposed to sexuality and porn. Too bad we can't revert our minds to before that point, so we can see only a candy castle and hearts on cookies! Oh, and Caroline B., did you mean to say, "Oh, Gash"?

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCathy

Those cookies put me in mind of decorated condoms. I'm not wired to see lady parts unless they're as big as castles.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMarkM

It's easy to see these were done by a master baker.

I don't think anyone is to blame, here. I mean, the bakery had background music that can best be described as 'brown chicken, brown cow', but that doesn't suggest anything was amiss. Some people like bad jazz. They've been meaning to change the phone number -- they were assigned that 900 number by accident. Yeah, that's the ticket.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Cathy - No I didn't mean to say that but I really wish I had - well done you!

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

That clump of cherries on the right corner seems to have an "odd" shape.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAaron

Happy Birthday Crystal! Ah, 30. It seems so long ago to me now...
Don't worry, it doesn't mean you have to grow up. Nothing ever means that!
Enjoy your day!

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

One year ago, Isabella emerged from this castle. It just hasn't been the same since she left.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

Craig, you just make me laugh.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermichelej

@SuBee, so THAT'S what they mean by the EuroZone!

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLaxmom

I'm confused as to why children seeing accidental representation of anatomy is traumatizing. The sooner we remove the stigma from sexuality the better.

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBassBone

blink. blink. blink. OoO

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteranony mouse

Not much mention of the awful airbrush job. Yuck!

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBelleT

@zoomom I giggle/snorted!!

(waves cheerfully) Bye to all those who were offended!!

@SuBee I went "huh" and THEN I laughed :)

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

Duh, John, you were obviously supposed to find and post more Memorial Day cakes. Which I imagine were supposed to be wrecky, but not disrespectful. Also, you REALLY shouldn't have said the V-word on the floor of the Michigan legislature. That was just really over the line.

[Editor's note- And I suppose you're leaving too! :) I tell you, for a site about funny cakes, we sure tick a lot of people off. Go figure... -john]

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterReggie

The problem I have with "real" porn is that after a while, the stuff gets boring....but not THESE wrecks!!! Finding anatomical parts accidentally rendered in frosting (shocking pink or flesh-colored) just never gets old, which is why I love this site so much! (Doesn't this cake complement the "fireman" cake?)

June 20, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDaisy

Lol!! I cannot stop laughing. Oh boy. That is one interesting cake.. yes sir and the cookies underneath don't look like breasts at all nope. No pervs here honest lol..

June 21, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Now, if I leave, how will I know what you subversives are up to? Nope, I'd better stay here for the good of the republic, lo, though it pains me to do so!

June 21, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterReggie

Fast forward a few years to Isabella, flipping through a family photo album. All quiet until...

"(Gasp) MOMMMMM!!!"

Mom (to herself): "Yes, the payoff was worth the wait."

By the way, I'm 98% sure those 'cookies' are bagels. Who decorates bagels? Besides Bevis, there, I mean. 'Unintentional' my navel.

June 21, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I think this is one of those "what has been seen cannot be unseen" moments... o_O

June 21, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

JM, get the cactus out of your butt.

Now THERE'S an idea for a Cake Wreck...


June 21, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoan

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