All Hands On Wreck: Pirate Ship Wedding Cake A Sight For Sore "Ayes"

Today's bride had an interesting request for her wedding: she wanted a pirate ship for the cake.

The baker was totally onboard, though, [snerk] and even sent over this inspiration picture so the bride would know what to expect on her Big Day.

You're seeing it now, right? All white, roses... I'll be darned if this isn't pretty elegant!

 

Ahh, but trim the sails and lash the rigging, ye scurvy dawgs, 'cuz here comes the actual wedding cake our anonymous bride got instead:

OH SHIP

Now that's a cake for private tears.

(Privateers? Eh? EH?)

You know, I could almost forgive the general fold-out-sofa-bed-on-blue-shag-carpet vibe going on here, but I cannot - CANNOT - get past those hysterical little "sails." Seriously. The longer you look at them, the funnier it gets. Like a hippo using a moist towelette square to preserve her modesty.

And that mental image you're having right now? Still not as funny as those sails.

 

Thanks to my anonymous bride minion, who I'm pretty sure is why the rum is gone. But hey, who could blame her?

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A Letter Wrong And A Holler Short

When you get like 99% of it right, but all anyone can talk about is that ONE LITTLE MISTAKE:

Home bun!

 

Her name is Lacy:

Guess why she didn't go back to get it fixed.

Because she was LATE, that's why.
Sheesh, you people.

 

A true test of Dad's skills:

 

The best part of this next one? This was the counter display:

For someone who really doesn't like lemons.

(Is this like "Batter up?" Should we ask a couple Fluggers to weigh in?)

(And what's with the little hash marks on the right? Are the letters R and P demonstrating proper Puker technique?)

 

Alas, we must leave the great Puker Debate for now, because... IT'S TIME.

What time, you ask?

TIME TO...

Awwwww yeeeeeah.

Right, one of you start wailing on the harpsichord, someone else roast up a bushel of sheep dongs, and the rest of us are gonna go get shot by a crossbow and/or die of plague.

("Man, this themed party suuuuucks.")

 

Thanks to Kathryn D., Lacy A., Judi S., Zanna F., & Ivy B. for going medieval on us.

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