My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

The Amercian Way

It's Veterans Day here in the U.S.: a day we set aside to honor those who have and are serving in our country's military. There are many fabulous ways to do this.

This is not one of them.

Now, I happen to know that a fair number of military personnel read this blog - a fact I find both humbling and just a teensy bit alarming, since I'm not sure those who share my twisted sense of humor should have access to heavy artillery. (Holy Hand Grenade, anyone?) On the other hand, I do so enjoy all the e-mails with the giant "DECLASSIFIED" stamps on them - and I'm pretty sure my coolness quotient went up about 1000% when a guy in uniform asked to have his photo taken with me at our last signing in Atlanta. (Hi, Paul!)

So in your honor, my dear veterans, here are some patriotic cake designs that will surely bring a tear to your eyes.

Because nothing says "America" quite like a dead, blank-eyed dog with a flag stuck in his head. [patting heart] Ah, it gets you right here, doesn't it?

The underline is what really sells it.

Of course today is about you, the troops:

And as "Owl Troops" you deserve "Supott."

Because you are all "Hero's."

And so we "honer" you, our "vetr ans."

Kind of like how we honor the flag, the symbol of this great nation:


No wait, I take that back: this Wreck leaves me shaken, not stirred. [ba dum bump!]

So remember, everyone: thanks to our veterans we have the freedom to live in this great country: the United States...

...of Amercia.

Michael H., Holly F., Tara L. Sara Beth, Nikki G., Adria P., & Tory L., I'm sure the CIA had nothing to do with that.

- Related Wreckage: Taking Liberties

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Reader Comments (115)

Congrats on the coolness points!
Be sure to post that picture sometime!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterlaura

The "dog" looks like it has blood coming out of it's mouth. Or maybe a blood clot....

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEmma

And maybe now we should all stand and sing "The White Dot Spangled Banner."

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJoanne L.

Many thanks to all our veterans!

Other than that . . . well, words fail me!

I'm speechless.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWriteCards

The "Supott Owl Toroops" one HAD to have been written by someone who had English as a second language. Or third. That is just so sad on so many levels. Great post today, but it is really sad how many ignorant people there are here. At the same time, that is the great thing about our country, we all have the right to be as ignorant as we want. Seriously though, thank you to all the veterans who have and are serving our country.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMike Owens

Amercia, that must be where people say "Lord Amercy".

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDinah Tate

That makes me so proud to serve... in Amercia.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAdrienne

Nothing says "God Bless America" like a cake that looks like a flag threw up.

I love this country. Thank you Vets!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHorribleLicensePlates

Too bad they messed up the spelling in the last one. It wasn't too bad looking!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAuntie Ashley

You always make me crack up.. now I'm doing it in a more Patreehotic way for Veterans day..BTW I "took the liberty" of linking this over at my MUCH less funny but very heart felt tribute to those who serve and those I served with. Thanks for the giggles.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDiPaola Momma

Aw, that last one almost had it. ALMOST. But I'm glad they missed it.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHalf Assed Kitchen

That's a dog? I thought it was a rare breed of blue Wookie.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMercredi

"...and they feasted on baboons, and breakfast cereals...."

I paraphrase of course. :)


WV: misph - Those are misphelled wrecks if ever there were misphellings.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

Seriously, I thought the dog was a moon-landing tribute that needed a color adjustment. (And I was not getting how that tied in with Veteran's Day!)

Happy Veteran's Day Amercia!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Thank you veterans and all who serve our country in the military!!!!

(Jen, Three shall be the number of the counting and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two except if thou then proceed to three. Five is right out.)

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJHill

Hey, Owl Toroops need all the supott they can get! I mean, those field mice aren't going to eat themselves (oh dear, I just had a vision of a owl pellet cake--make it go away!)

Ahem. Yes, thanks to all the brave men and women who have protected their country over the years. All of us, whether celebrating Veterans Day, Remembrance Day or Armistice Day (or any other name given to commemorate the end of WWI) owe a great debt of gratitude.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRedd

I laughed til I cried reading your comment about the dog! @Emma it really does look like blood coming out of its mouth! Too, too funny.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSunshine Mom

That dog is going to haunt my dreams forever.


November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKarmaPearl

Armistice Day here but anyone who knows us Brits knows we have a huge sense of humour!So great wrecks ! and keep smiling!
Family WWI story, my Grandad was reported as MIA on the list outside the Post Office leaving my Grandmother fearing the worst. Later that day she answered a knock at the door to see him standing on the doorstep! Knocked out by a shell blast he had been put on a hospital ship were he came around to find himself only a few miles from his seaside town home .Luckily for me he lived until 1981 !

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdiddleymaz

That last cake was soooo close!

Happy Remembrance Day!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

I like how the "Vetr ans" also has "honer" on it too :)

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterViolet

The second one is obviously symbolism!

The blank eyes represent all men being created equal, so the dog is color-blind.

The blue "fur" respresents the blue collar workers that built this country.

The fact that the dog is dead represents the death of... uh... I don't know... disco?

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTaylor@myolderbrothers

I think the flag killed that dog.


November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDedi

Know what's funny? Technically the "Hero's" one is correct. The apostrophe denotes a left-out letter.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

so the amerCIA cake was probably the best cake out of all of them as far as overall layout and design, straight flag, mediocre border, ehh- halfway decent writing.. what more do you want amercia? hahah you gotta love the dead dog staring into space being decapitated by a flag!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

LOL, it has a nice ring to it!

~JD Greenwood
WV: psednedl...I give up *shrug*

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Great post today, Jen! (Oh, every other day, too!)

@Joanne L.--Haha!!

@diddleymaz-- Thanks for the war story, which I enjoyed a lot. :)

I'd share one from my great uncle, but the ones that stand out aren't repeatable here (not due to violent content, but because they all had to do with shore leave!) Wish I'd been spared the thoughts, myself!

And thank you to our "toroops" everywhere-- you're in our hearts and prayers!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

They do say that many natural born citizens would fail the citizenship test if they had to apply like immigrants. I think we can safely say that these wreckarators would be shipped out on the first boat home.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRhonda

hahahah: "this is not one of them"

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNatballs

My husband and I are both veterans, and I have to say we are both honored and humbled by your post today. God Bless Amercia!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie Stuart

come on, smurfdog roadkill always makes for a great celebratory pastry motif!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTXpi

"Support our Hero's...": I hope that continues on the next cake.

That poor dog looks like it wandered onto one of those awful sticky traps for mice and died. Someone should take the whole thing out in the yard and bury it. Maybe plant a tree to mark the spot, too.

(Did I just say Spot? Ohhh...)

WV: wastoner-- You wouldn't have to call the copy repair guy so often if you didn't wastoner.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I have shared your blog with so many members of my unit - you make me and many other smile (and sometimes laugh out loud like a crazy person...)

Thank you!

SrA Adams
459th AES, Andrews AFB, MD

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJ Adams

Oh my goodness, I can't stop laughing! You are hilarious!!!


November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRy and Kris Jones

that dog was beaten to the curb!

And the others (shaking my head -but LOVING your blog!)

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterS3XinthePantry

"Because nothing says "America" quite like a dead, blank-eyed dog with a flag stuck in his head. [patting heart] Ah, it gets you right here, doesn't it?"

LMAO *wipes tears from eyes* That killed me! And what does a dead blue mophead of a dog with blank eyes, a prune nose and its tongue sticking out have to do with TODAY? Did the flagpole stuck in its head kill it? How is blue poochicide patriotic?

The other flags are just. so. sad. They even forgot to finish the stripes on the ribbon thing.

But at least most of these got sprinkles, right?

Go Owl Troops! hoo-HOOT!

(What do you supposed owl troops do anyway? Are they like the night vision alarm watch or something?)

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJoanne

Thanks to all our veterans! And thanks, Cake Wrecks, for always making me laugh

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCarol

tooooo funny!!! love 'em all.

i apologize for getting serious, but my community has been in the grips of shock and grief these last several days.

i am proud to call killeen/fort hood my home ... and i'm proud of each and every one of our precious soldiers who serve and protect us all.

thanks for making us laugh again, jen and john. it truly is the best medicine!

terry lee

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTerry Lee

I have never been so proud to be a vetr an of Amercia.

Happy Veterans Day to my fellow veterans.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

oh, and thank you troops and Vets! (Veterans, not veterinarians, even though blue pooch could probably have used one. No offense, animal docs!)

We truly thank you for your service! No matter what these wreckerators did....

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJoanne

I thought the "ribbon" cake could've been good, without the, erm, "owl" tribute. I envision massive flocks of owls in flight, bombing the enemy with poo. Sorry. It was in my head and now it's out. =P

WV - fullyina - I am fullyina state of gratitude for our vets!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMarcy W.

I am glad to serve and protect dumb people. Love your site, brings me many smiles.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterZee

Not only is the blue dog puking blood, it's got black poos. It must be ill indeed...

Captcha: dissen - We is dissen dese "cakes".

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBetsey

I'm glad you posted those two wrecks I sent in (the 1st and 7th photos). The best part, they were next to each other at the grocery store. Too bad you didn't post the other two I sent in. Of course, if I find 5 wrecks on the same table at the store, do I get a wreck-yahtzee?

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommentermooP

Oh, and those cakes were purchase in a store less than a mile from the White House! You think that they'd get it right in DC of all places!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommentermooP

Looking at those cakes, I have never been more proud to be a Canadian.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTrish

That says "Support Owl Troops"??? I thought it said Boycott Owl Troops.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSuetois

Wow. Yes, your coolness quotient totally went up. Love the flag wrecks, Happy Veterans Day!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSabrina

One cake
under frosting
with buttercream
and crusties for all.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJon and Becky

I like to scroll down slowly to see if I can figure out what's going on with the cakes before I read your comments. That second one really had me stumped--putting the flag atop Iwo Jima? A salute to the Navy with a large ocean wave? Um, a flag waving in the sky? I gave up. Then I read your comment and couldn't stop laughing. What????? (And then Emma's comment about the blood clot had me going again!) I'm sure that vets all over the world are saluting the Dead Blue Dog of Proud Service. Or something.
Thanks as always for the daily laugh.
Proud daughter of two WWII vets!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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