We at Cake Wrecks realize that there are some of you who don't celebrate Christmas. Or Hanukkah. Or Kwanzaa. Or any other winter holiday. Heck, you probably don't even like winter all that much. Or snow. Or puppies. Basically, there's just no making you happy. So, in an effort to placate your scrooge-ish sensibilities, today's commentary will be completely made up of awkward, holiday-free small talk. Enjoy.
You know, the guy from Firefly?
Firefly. C'mon: the Joss Whedon show? Really popular? No? You've...never seen it. Oh. Um. Never mind.
So... [puffing out cheeks]...yeah.
Probably the cold.
Hey, you know what I could use? A beer. [elbowing ribs] Nothing better on a cold night, am I right? Eh? Can I grab you one?
Oh. You don't drink. [nodding] Well, good! Good for you.
Now there is a smokin' fine woman. Hoo whee! Get a looksie at that caboose!
I'm terribly sorry. I didn't realize you had a daughter.
Do you know where the bathroom is? Over there? Oops, Janet just went in. Guess I'll just wait.
[fidgeting] [sigh] [adjusting cufflinks]
Woo boy. I'm getting kinda hungry... think I'll go check out that cheese platter. Want anything?
Lactose intolerant, huh? Bummer. Well, it was great talking to you... Christine, right? Ok, yeah, I'll talk at you later. You can count on it! Heheh, get it? That's a little number humor for ya.
Oh, and sorry again about the caboose thing. You have a lovely daughter. In fact, I...am leaving now, yes. Sorry. G'night.
Thanks, Tyler L., Vanessa D., Somer P., Reginia B., Rachel H., Jason D., David G., Christina N., & Ashley. Now if you'll excuse me, I'll just be over here sway-dancing in the corner and trying to avoid eye-contact.