My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

And I Have No Privacy!

"Hey, Frank, man, you ever get the feeling someone's - I dunno - watching you?"

"No, man, can't say that I do. Why do you ask?"

"Eh, maybe I've just been working too hard, but this bakery is starting to give me the willies."


"Well, we have been pulling some long hours. Don't worry; I'm sure it's just your imagination."


"Yeah, you're probably right."



Thanks to Michelle S. for making googly eyes at us.

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Reader Comments (33)

OMG! Did someone put real light bulbs on the first cake?? And what is with those plastic face pieces?? Either someone went a little nuts, or someone over-ordered and decided to use them up every way possible. These are horrible!! Thanks Jen :-) Nery Crismaz!

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSandy in soFla

I totally read that in my head like Buddy from "Cake Boss" and then had to go back and re-read "when gangsters go PC!"

Those eyes are creepy like lemurs. Santa's part lemur? I'm glad I haven't seen that flotsam in person.

Update: only 364 shopping days 'til Christmas- if you celebrate that type of thing. ;)

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

Ugh, what is that even supposed to be??? Peepeing tom frost?? D:

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Are those eyes candy or plastic? I can't tell from here.

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBea

thanks for continuing to post over the holidays - although is today a public holiday in the US? it's Boxing Day in the UK, and I have a Christmas Pudding to have a nibble on later...but seeing these MAD STARING EYES I may wait a little til the unease wears off... It does make you wonder how they're meant to be used, y'know, in the hands of a competent baker...

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjenni
December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJoel Polowin

Cake Wrecks has totally corrupted me. When I read the line "this bakery is starting to give me the willies," I wasn't thinking of eyes -- I was thinking of that other anatomical feature that often, well, "pops up" on wrecks. Thanks for making me look at cakes in a whole new light. My mom would be so proud...

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

"Eyecontact is HUGELY important to me". Looks like Christopher Walken has moved from plants to cakes...

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNeedleNerd

Good I HATE those Fingeroos (that's the name for those googly eye balls). My work makes us make some of the cakes that go with those things for various holidays...especially the Easter bunny...I always feel like I'm decorating a bunny cake that's snorted too much crack. Seriously...the fingeroo cakes look like meth or crack addicts that are on benders and haven't sleep for days. I attached the link if anyone wants to see what they're supposed to look like....and imo they don't look good.

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered Commentergrnbutterfly

You know, what I always wondered about is... are cakes in the US really that expensive? Especially wrecks like this?? (O.o) How do wreckaries survive?

The answer is somewhere out there.
And I guess it doesn't hurt if it stays where it is.

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHisietari

grnbutterfly you could try pushing a little icing just over the tops of the eyes to make them look like they are more relaxed. But not too much, or they'll look like they just haven't slept for days PERIOD!

The things I've been learning in my cake decorating class! ;-)

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnne

Does anyone else ha an Eddy Grant song going through their head now? " I always feel like....somebody's waaaaaatching me."

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMary

I'VE SEEN THOSE THINGS!!! You're supposed to wear them on your knuckles to turn your hand into a creepy sort of puppet ala "Oobi" (did anybody ever see that show?)

I'm not sure when bakers decided we needed toys with our cake; dessert is usually enough for me. Then again, maybe THESE cakes need all the help they can get...

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

"There seems to be a theme to these cakes, Bevis."
"You may address me as the Great..."
"Oh, no -- not again. No wonder there's no coffee."

On the other hand, this flotsam could be a good mascot for DOC.

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I dont care what Decopac says about their -FINGEROOS- they are NOT cute little finger puppets ... EYEBALLS on your knuckle is just creepy ...

and what people DO with those eyeballs is even creepier ...

I"m going to put the bag over my head NOW and pretend I didnt see that...and definately didnt just order them for my bakery....

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJuliet

Who's read 1984 by George Orwell? Anyway, for those of you who have, here's my take on this. " Big Brother is always watching- What do you mean he's in a different dimension. Damn. What else do we have to always watch people?" "What about these cakes?" "Yeah, they'll do."

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterG

I like them. They look like fun, new Muppet characters.

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRich "Mr. Wonderful" Greene

DOC needs a spotlight with a piping bag in its center. Whenever someone sees a cake in need of correction, they can shout:

"Send up the Bag Signal!!!"

DOC: To Correct and To Serve (Thanks again, Barbara Anne.)

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

"Say, Frank, it's already the 24th and we've only used a quarter of these googly-eye Santa sets. Should I put the rest in storage?"
"Dude, those are plastic! You gotta use that stuff before it expires!"
"Aw, jeez, I didn't know! Now I have to make like a billion Santa-shaped cakes!"
"Wait! I have a better idea!"

That extra smear of red on the bottom-most set of eyes is a nice touch.

December 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

Oh boy these wrecks seem to be full of mustaches and googly eyes. Makes me wonder if they are all the same bakery lol or these wreckerators just happened to all get obsessed with watching customer cakes all of a sudden. Eeek. Though I would eat the candy canes and run away as I do from that first cake lol.

December 27, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

That second picture looks like Santa and the Cheshire Cat's love baby. Sorry Mrs. Claus...

December 27, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterspahrkle

@Mary - that was Rockwell not Eddy Grant

December 27, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCybrczch

Well, the second wreck had me thinking about one of the santas we have in our folklore (yes, they are 13 and used to be perverts and thiefs) which is named something that would translate into english as "peeping tom". Very logical cake for that santa... creepy

December 27, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnna

HAHA! It's way too early for me to be up, so I found this particularly hilarious! Why would they put eyes on the window?? I love it! It's sooo creepy and funny! Thanks for making 2am bearable.

Keep up the awesome!!

December 27, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly

Where's the Kwanza cake??????

December 27, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonononon

If I feed the cakes Decaf will they open safes while sleeping?

On a serious note, what in the world are those things? The very existence of these cakes proves that demons walk the earth and at least one works at DecoPac!

December 27, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

Did you drink too much Christmas spirit today? Hello?

December 27, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

Those look like peeper puppets! You wear them around your finger and turn your hand into a puppet.

December 27, 2011 | Unregistered Commentertiny p elephant

[Friendly voice] @Marie, they posted on Saturday and Christmas Sunday, while moderating us (probably a full-time job in itself), running another blog, revising their decorations, inventing at least three new words AND designing and building a working Infinite Improbability drive from items found at Home Depot. Surely, that merits one day off per year. As a concession, any more than that could be put to a vote. I could run it up the flagpole at DOC and see who salutes. ;-)

December 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

When really young children just gawp and stare up at me when I say hello to them and wait for them to reply, I am often very strongly tempted to call them "googly-eyes."

They look a lot like these cakes.

December 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKT

Those are Peeper puppets. The are the creation of a friend; so, I say the more the better. keep those royaties comming in.

December 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJon

So, my laptop was kinda lagging and I turned away while it loaded picture... I screamed so loud my husband paused his video game to check on me. His scream woke our children.. Really you should put warnings on those things..

Happy New Year!

December 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

Oh, you better watch out
You better not ask for sprinkles
You better bake good I'm telling you why
Santa Cake is coming to town

He's baking a list
And checking it twice
Gonna find out whose wrecky or sweet
Santa Cake is coming to twon

He sees you when your sleeping,
He knows when your awake
He knows if you've been wrecky or sweet
So be good 'cuz he's a cake......with eyes that stare at you from trees and sleighs

December 31, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterClaire

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