My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

The Farce is Strong With This One

We interrupt your Friday wreckage to bring you this special report:


Yes, a Belgian burger joint has recently debuted the questionably spelled "Dark Vador Burger," simultaneously offending grammar nazis, fanboys, and taste buds everywhere.

Since it appears this Fan Tum Menace uses a large charcoal briquette for a bun, we decided to hit the local Jabba Jamba Hut for a few "Han-on-the-street" reactions:


"That's no moon. Luke, use the forks!" - Ben Kenobi, Krayt Caller

"I have a very bad feeling about this." - Luke Skywalker, Incessant Whiner

"These are NOT the buns you're looking for." - Princess Leia, Princess

"Look's kind of Chewie to me. One thing's for sure, we're all gonna be a lot thinner!" - Han Solo, Shot First


The Jedi Council could not be reached for comment, but we did receive this automated voicemail:

"It's a TRAP!" - Admiral Ackbar, One Hit Wonder


The Imperial Empire also weighed in with this e-mail from Darth Vader, Sith Lord:

"Come to the dark side. We have charcoal. HAHAH!! But seriously, I find your lack of taste....disturbing. And did you see they misspelled my name? I mean, SERIOUSLY."




Update: I'm relieved to see so many people have grasped my true objective in this post, which was to start a debate over whether the burger chain in question is actually Belgian or French. Bravo! You've passed the test, and may now commence commenting on Youtube videos.

At any rate, the Yahoo article I referenced claims it's Belgian, so my sincere apologies if it is, in fact, French.

Also, according to the latest Epcot Threat Level Report the French translation of Darth Vader is actually "Dark Vader," although you have to say it with a French accent. There are also a lot of footnotes about "Vader" meaning "father" and copyright stuff and whether or not black bread tastes good, but by that point I was distracted by something shiny and lost interest. You can read it all for yourselves in the comments here and on Facebook, though, on the off chance you've misplaced your cattle prods and need to punish yourself for something.

Well, I think that's everything! Have a fantabulous weekend, everyone, and may the Farce be with you...ALWAYS.

- Jen

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Reader Comments (69)

WTB-what the beef????

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Dark = Puissance Obscure? Puissance Obscure translates to Dark Power. So they're saying this is the Dark Power Vader burger. I don't this this helps in any way. :) Star Wars fans are dying a little.
I've actually had black bread a few times and it can be really good. I'm not sure the burger looks that bad, but they need some serious help with the marketing.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPam

Apparently "Dark Vador" is the proper name for "Darth Vader" in French. *shrug*

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAli

Love this! Just when I start to think you're really funny you go and remind me that your freakin' hilarious!

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTricia

AAHHHH!!! Make it stop!

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAmy's Cooking Adventures

I'd have thought that using the spelling "Dark Vador" was their way of avoiding trademark issues with Lucas, but then they go and stick Darth Vader on their ad, because there's nothing better than copyright infringement. Somebody please report this to the copyright holder.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSkeptic

How much black food coloring did they have to add to that bread dough? Other than the briquette bun, it does look sort of tasty!

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKelley

Well, just for the record, in the french translation of Star Wars, a.k.a "La guerre des étoiles", they actually translated some names.
And yes, the translation was "Dark Vador" just google for it if you do not believe me.
Because everybody knows what dark is, and somehow, dark=black=...
Marvellous what those creative marketing types can come up with, mmhh ?
Don't worry, this happens to movie all over the world regularly. Move along, nothing to taste here.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterFrenchyHere

You left out the Jedi Burger (yes, there is one).

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterjosin

If I remember my French lessons properly, there is no real "th" sound in French. Therefore, having a "Darth Vador" burger would be extraordinarily difficult for a French speaker to pronounce. I'm guessing that's why "Darth" was changed to "Dark."

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRebecca

Hi! I'm French, and I must confirm that "Dark Vador" is Darth Vader's name in french translations of Star Wars films & books. Darth Maul is also Dark Maul, and so on...

Quick is McDonald's competitor in France and Belgium; this firm has launched three *official* Star Wars burgers : one for Darth vader (your picture), one for Darth Maul and one for Yoda. They will be featured / advertized a few weeks. Only the Dark Vador' one is black. ;-)

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEdhral

Did you see the Jedi Burger? It has like... MARSHMALLOWS on it. /shudder. I'd turn to the dark side and rather not have marshmallows on my buns.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRNT

Oh, thank goodness you saw this! When I first checked out an article about this burger my thoughts were "Oh man, WHY!?!?!??????????????????!!!!!"

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCristi

can i just say that Quick is French and not Belgian! thank you very much ;) we will probably get them too since Quick does have a lot of restaurants here but they are still French ;)

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBadia

It's not copyright infringement.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnnette

oh and those are not marshmallows on the jedi burger! ... that's cheese

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBadia

Gotta be cheese on the Jedi burger. Small chunks instead of a slice? And can you imagine what your teeth will look like after eating all the food coloring in the buns of the Dark Vador burger? Blech.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSteampunk Octopus

Here is a full article:

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie Rector

bwahahahaha... now I have to try to find "La guerre des étoiles" on youtube or something. We watched "The Little Mermaid" in French back in high school, but Star Wars would've been way cooler!

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnony

Dark Vador is Darth Vader, it's okay. Fun fact: Vader is Father in Dutch. Didja know that? ;)

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAllie B.C.

A side note:

"Vader" in Dutch means "Father". So the big surprise "I am you FATHER!!!" reveal in Empire Strikes Back was no surprise at all to the Dutch. Go fig.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAshley P

I just threw up a little in my mouth. Nope, threw up a lot.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermabeno

Also, to add to the comments above, it's probably of note that French does not have the digraph "th" as we pronounce it in English. Often if there is a word with the "th" sound it would be pronounced "t" (as in Roland Barthes). So if they kept the name it would be pronounced "Dart Vador" They probably found "Dark" a little more menacing-sounding.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLunElectronique

Definitely going for one when i'm in Belgium (have a sister over there, it's a great and weird country!)

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPien

Not that growing up in Belgium has somehow biased my opinion or anything, but I think it's HILARIOUS, and I would go to Quick and buy one of those inky mofos post-haste and eat it with alacrity. But hey, I also like paté and escargots, so I guess that doesn't say much.

They probably also deliberately misspelled 'vader' because a direct translation of vader in dutch/Flemish is FATHER. So it would be dark father burger.... Just speculating.

-- HC

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterThe Hungarican Chick

I loved "Luke Skywalker, Incessant Whiner" and "Han Solo, Shot First."

Also, that burger looks really unappetizing.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMelindaB

Can you imagine what color this will turn your...uh...trip to the can the next day? I shudder to think. Grape Gatorade and Pepto Bismol have nothing on this bun!

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAA

And here I thought Darth Vader was gonna say, "That's not affiliated with me!" a la Mr. Incredible.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

is it just me or does the bun look chalky?

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAddy

The teeth are strong on this one.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJanice

Sometimes these posts are so ridiculously ethnocentric.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

So, is the Dark Maul Burger going to have a red bun? And will Yoda have a olive green bun on his burger? Can you imagine what teeth would look like after eating a bright red bun?XP

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKelticat

The bun is probably similar to a pumpernickel or Russian black bread. No food coloring, but maybe natural cocoa powder and dark rye flour. It's probably pretty good. Beats the feral pig cake anyday.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMarcie

Haven't you ever seen rye bread before? This is just a color-enhanced variant called "rye savor." Not as clumsy or random as Wonderbread; an elegant pastry for a more civilized age.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

Basketball is a peaceful planet!

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGeorge P

the bun color is probably more from the flour used than just a food color. I'd try that but I also like escargot and fried chicken gizzards (not together!! eww). :D

I also had a full size poster of Darth Vader on my closet door in junior high and high school.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

Actually took a good look at the pictures and dug up the articles. The 'marshmallow' things on the Jedi burger are actually cheese curds like what goes on poutine, so nothing bad there. And from a baking background, I'd say the bread has bamboo charcoal baked into it to give it the truly 'black bread' look since black bread is usually just very dark brown. Still....very weird.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTK

I would actually try one of these...just to say I had done it.

January 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

French, Belgian, who cares? That burger is scary looking and nothing in that picture is endearing me to try it. It looks yicky.

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPeachkins

Even more disturbing (to the Force), is that these specialty burgers are a promotional tie in for the upcoming re-release of The Phantom Menace in 3D. And yes, Jar Jar Binks is still in it. (sigh)

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKC

No one EPCOTted on what this has to do with cake? Well, it is 2012, after all. Looks like the Mayans will have been right (I misplaced my copy of 'Restaurant at the End of the Universe', so I can't update the syntax).

It is amusing, in a Gallic sort of way, how anything connected even tangentially to France (Mardi Gras, for instance) produces the most vehement comments imaginable.

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Where's the cake?? lol

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterhannonle

It may have been pulled from a Belgian ad, because they speak French, German, and Dutch there.
I think TK is right. The "marshmallows" on the Jedi burger are cheese curds. It would be hard to say what they are if you're from a country where they don't have them (but they're oh so good! The salty, squeeky... ok, I'm done)
And I can definitely attest to the fact that the French don't have a "Th" sound. Living in New Brunswick, it's funny to hear my French friends say things like "ta" when they mean "the".

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMel

*prairie dog up* Is is safe to come out of the bunker yet?

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermin

Wait- cattle prods?

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Thanks for the AWESOME post! I'm a Star Wars fanatic, so I found the "comments on the street" hilarious! I also saw this horrible ad, and knowing George Lucas, this burger won't survive for long!

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterWendy

Because I'm OCD like that ... um, "look's" ? Any reason for the random apostrophe?
Oh, and the burger looks nasty.

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGin

that looks gross. why is the bun so dark? what does it taste like?

anyway, French is one of the three official languages of Belgium so it could still be Belgian.

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterjojo

I now desperately want to try the Vader-burger. Looks like it's time for a road trip to France!
What? I can ford the oceans, right? Or caulk the station wagon and float across?

Although I'm kind of hoping one of the restaurant chains in the US jumps on the bandwagon and tries something similar. That would be a bit more convenient ^_~.

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStevie Lou

the Quick is a French restaurant chain (basically a copy of McDonalds)

I learned that when I live there for a year

January 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterYvette

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