My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Body of Art

The flower represents the innocence of youth.

The stump, life's transience.

And the flaming tentacle hands cradling the noodle-limbed fetus broken in half?


Well, those are there just to freak you the f*** out.


Mission accomplished, Erika K.


(Btw, pretty sure those baby legs are going to be tap-dancing their way into my nightmares tonight.)

*Tappity tap tap tap*

*Tappity tap tap tap*




[Note from john: The "f" word up there was "fern." Wait... you didn't think... what is WRONG with you people?!]

« Easy As 1,2,C! | Main | Sunday Sweets: Robot Rock »

References (1)

References allow you to track sources for this article, as well as articles that were written in response to this article.
  • Response
    Thank you for the good writeup. It in reality was once a entertainment account it. Glance advanced to far introduced agreeable from you! By the way, how could we communicate?

Reader Comments (161)

Holy. .. Fern.

Part of me is freaking out, and the other part wishes the fetus was doing jazz hands, to go with those tappity legs.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

It's being assimilated, right?

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

. . . That is really, really disturbing. Who on earth could ever have thought that was a good idea?

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKte

There should be a category in the DSM for someone who would think this was a good idea for a cake. OMG.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnne

Seriously - WTF, people?

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJustMe

People work so hard to make their cakes beautiful. I can't imagine someone slaving over this cake. I can't even tell what it is! Is that an arm? Is that "flower" covering her hoo-ha? I'm so conflicted right now!

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTomara

My sister told me about cakewrecks a couple years ago, I caught up on the archives when I was laid off shortly after, and I've been a faithful, daily reader since. I can honestly say this is the very first time I've ever looked at a cake and physically thrown up in my mouth a little bit. Yay for cakewrecks firsts! Well played.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKSLSRocks

Maybe it's actually two babies?? And it's the second baby's legs which are visible, and it's head and torso and under the stump/arm/death trap? Not sure if that's any less freaky... <shudder> Or am I the only one who sees this?

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterkhiemstra

Looks like someone took a little trip to the Mutter Museum in Phillie.
I guess they sell cakes in the gift shop now.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Uh huh.. I'm 34 weeks pregnant. According to this, the thumps I'm feeling under by ribs are coming from baby's... bum?

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJudi

*blinks* *flushes eyes with saline solution, stares and blinks again* I honestly don't know if I should be confused or terrified. So far, the terror is winning by a narrow margin. O.o

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCindy

I would really like to know if the baker was told that they specifically wanted to freak everyone the hell out. Seriously, what's with the bronze tentacly things? And khiemstra, I can totally see that and it freaked me out a little bit more!

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSuzieQ

What a horrifying... thing.. that is. I'm going to have nightmares.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie


April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoan

I think this is the most disgusting cake I've seen so far, and I have been coming to this site for a long time. I am not going to say what it reminds me of because I am a NICE person. Ugh!

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDorothy

I don't think any other post has elicited a "WTF...ern!" more than that cake.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnna N

My first reaction was "what in the Sam Hill is that?" After taking a closer look, it seems to me that the flower is on the neck stump. It sort of looks like there are breasts on the right side, mostly covered under the arm. The second arm is cradling the bottom of the stomach, and the bronze tentacle stuff looks to me like it's supposed to be some sort of henna or tattoo art or something to cover up where the hands should be. My guess is the baker couldn't do large hands very well and it's supposed to be more abstract than realistic.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTea

Mother-love, a fire.
It may eat our heads, limbs, but
never modesty.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy


April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEvan

I'm keep looking at this, hoping to make sense of it, and I just can't. Is it sort of like an open version of the preggo belly cake? With a very small and noodley babe? At least it's not an anatomically correct c-section... right? I've seen that cake, and it's not pretty. Are those arms with bronze tentacles placed for modesty or is it an "artistic" representation of the "growth and transformation" of mother hood? Or is the headless torso being assimilated? (Resistance is futile, after all.) And why is the headless torso wearing a brooch on her bare neck? I'm too confused to be terrified.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKdot

Well, i had some of the similar thoughts as Tea, but i'm thinking the bronze fire fingers on the left ( not sure if it is the top or bottom ) but if it is the bottom, i'm putting out there the idea that maybe they are ----- stretch marks? Really serious major stretch marks but ... Maybe Marie Antoinette was pregnant when they sliced off her head and this is a dedication to her? Its ashame her unborn child was going to be physically disabled and needing a wheel chair.

I figured the F*** was for freaky...

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDiana

Why do I keep looking at Cake Wrecks so close to breakfast? Why?

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJanice

I had already decided years ago that I didn't want to have children. After seeing this, I'm going to go ahead and just have all my reproductive organs surgically removed.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRamey Marx

I'm having serious Lovecraftian WAKING NIGHTMARES!!1111!1!!! *shudder*

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPing


April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteranon

Yum. Silly-Putty coloured abomination cake.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterspel chek

This is just...... so...... wrong.
On so many levels
How could someone take pride in making something like that???

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

Oh, those are arms!?
I thought they were giant ovaries run amok. Now I see they're supposed to be arms.Really strange arms.I sincerely hope, that if I'm ever decapitated, someone will be thoughtful enough to place a flower over my "neck stump."
No joke-I suddenly feel like crying. This is one powerful pastry.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

It is not often that we get a cake filled with such depth of significance, yet sums up its obvious meaning with a simple metaphor – the small, dried grape on the doily on the right of the cake… it’s about raisin’ kids….

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermel

What...were they going for??? O_o It looks like the baby is being swallowed up by the Great Earth Spirit. Pagan birthing ritual?? Pro abortion cake cake?? Either way AUUUGGHH D:

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

I think you're right Tea. There are handish lumps under the those tentecalites. Maybe the shape of the hands helps explain those legs, and the fact that the baby is where here heart should be...Does anyone have the number for MIB?

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterkymdydyt

I characteristically try to avoid recycling comments. HOWEVER, in this case, it is entirely appropriate, really, so...

DEAR GOD, WHAT IS THAT THING!?!???!??!!???!!!

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

Brain bleach. Please pass it. Now. Please.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMelonie

My five year old says it's a sea anenome with an octopus on it

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBrown Goose

Hairy, flesh-colored
scary mama/baby thing
Can't unsee, must cry

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGrnEyes6

I call the fetus!

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEpcotLover

I've watched far too much Dr. Who and read far too much Stephen King.....this is downright SCARY!
What happened to it's legs? And why is it's host turning into a centipede? Another candidate for a very sharp knife being plunged repeatedly into the centre of it to make sure it doesn't follow me home....

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCarolineB

Worst, cake, ever.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMrs E

Is this cake telling us all to disinfect something, or that we're way behind on our Science Fiction reading? Or is it an out-take from the film "You're Alien, Not Us" in which the dinner/emergence scene is replaced by a horrifying cinematic view of human birth ( rated NSH: Not Suitable for Hatchlings)?

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergobbler

Probably just one of those New Age, First Nations tribal things. C'mon people.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBea

Folks, it's on a turkey platter - appropriately a turkey. Does this mean "homemade"? In any event It's WTP - What's the point . Ugh.

Brown Goose - I'm seriously worried about your 5-year-old. Agree with the kid's analysis, but if said child grows up to be a serial killer, we'll know why and how. ;-)

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoanie

I'm trying to figure out what exactly the customer ordered here. Did someone really go into a cake shop and ask for an exposed freakishly tiny but well developed fetus in a scooped out belly with brass colored tendrils and neck stump or did they see this in a sample book and say "That's it! that's the one I want!"? If the latter, what kind of baker would put this in the photo book and does that mean there are two of them out there? If the former - WTF!?!?!?!

I must have the back story for this or the image will never leave my mind. I will never be able to go to a baby shower wondering if this was the cake that the baker really wanted to make.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

Okay, it's a pregnant woman's body, and a flower where her head should be, and a sun on her left shoulder and suns for hands.

Maybe the bakery has molds for this style sun but never had to make an icing baby before. Maybe they thought the baby didn't look right with the legs covered up.

I will admit, it took me a few tries to get it.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAisha

That "flower" looks like some kind of skin disorder.

I thought that "arm" across the breasts was a flaming match stick.

I'm gonna say it's a representation of the scenes in The Matrix where Neo takes the red pill and then Morpheus tells him about the babies being batteries.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

BUT GUYS GUYS it's all on a silver platter! It's the way we love having all of life's oddities handed to us, no?

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

the sad thing (other than the whole what the fern vibe) is that the wreckerator has obviously worked very hard on this, and has some actual talent (despite an utter lack of anatomical acumen).

Whomever came up with this design, though, is certifiably, and possibly criminally, insane.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJustMe

If that is a rubber baby (and it certainly appears to be), then the rest must be a buggy bumper. From Neptune.

The really disturbing thought is that there might be a back story that on the surface makes some kind of sense which explains all of this. You know, like the drawing of a candlestick that becomes two faces in silhouette when the viewer's perspective shifts. There's that brief moment, like a flipped coin balanced on edge, when you can see it both ways at the same time.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I'm pretty sure it is a diabolical attempt to thaw a Thanksgiving turkey using a prototype of solar adhesive tentacle thingies and an albino hairless chihuahua.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRachaol

ACK! So glad I saw this post today... three days before I am supposed to be having my first child. Those little legs ARE going to haunt me in my sleep. *shiver*

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJen

This cake was made for the launch of a new pharmaceutical.
Wrexital, the new drug for use during pregnancy, may be used to relieve pain here, here and here. (See placement of copper-coloured pain indicators.) Whether your pain is caused by trying to pick up your toddler, reaching to tie up your shoes or resisting the urge to slap your mother-in-law, Wrexital can help. Try Wrexital today.
(Side effects may include dismemberment and/or displacement of limbs, loss of head. Some transparency of abdominal skin may occur.)

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>