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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Friday Favs 1/30/15

Some of my favorite new submission this week:


[singing] Double your pleasure, double your...

Never mind.


When Jeff's co-worker retired, they decided to go with a golfing sentiment on the cake. Appropriate, because look how well the baker teed them off!

Ahh, if only ALL the gruss was grenner, am I right?


Here's another stencil malfunction, but one only you Australian readers will appreciate:

To be fair, I hear it's easy to get turned around Down Under.

(Via this article, which gets major props for calling it the "cake that flipped a nation." Hee!)


Anyone else get the feeling bakers are sick of drawing footballs?

No? Just me?


And finally,

I think this giraffe is trying to wink at us:

So why can't I stop screaming?


Thanks to Kara P., Jeff R., everyone in Australia who reads this blog, Melissa U., & Anony M. for proving that winking at strangers is always creepy, so stop it, winkers. JUST STOP.


Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

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Reader Comments (39)

Oh man Jen I hate it when you zoom in on a feature. Or face.
A face of constipation
A face of despair
A weeping, icing-running face
Ug. Can't.Unsee.

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

Oh! Poor, sad giraffe
Mired in a sugary swamp
Awaits it's demise

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

I accidentally clicked on the last picture of the giraffe and it opened on a new page.
The giraffe's face in close up, unable to kiss a thing, detail.
I expect I will have nightmares!

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTanya L

That Giraffe cake would want make scream too....IN BLOODY TERROR!!

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBigg3469

As a devoted Pittsburgher, I knew I had to investigate the giraffe cake and bring the news to all you in CW land. Apparently, there IS a giraffe named Mel at the Pittsburgh Zoo now. Two Masai giraffes, which are endangered in Africa because of poaching, were added to the zoo in recent months. However, it's the male giraffe that's named Mel and from what I can tell by the squished purple writing, the winking cake was for someone named Melanie? Melody? (You guys are better at reading CW writing than I am.) I can imagine, though, that the human Mel feels some affinity for Mel the giraffe: a wry look, a rueful smirk, an unblinking stare. I can relate, myself.
But I'd never be able to eat that cake.

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterFM

Honestly, that giraffe would have made another excellent ad against domestic abuse during the Superbowl this Sunday.
I know, dark humor, but after all these cannibalistic baby and vagina cakes… just blame Jen. :-P

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterAthena


January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterXena

That giraffe looks like it's being sucked into the LaBrea Tarpits of Gloom and Despair. Poor thing. . . . .

I would think it would be much easier to frost a pastry in brown and draw the laces than write "football" on each one. But hey, what do I know?

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

That last cake will in my nightmares

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

I hope those first two aren't for twins. They could end up fighting about who gets roses and who gets balloons. Or, BOTH could be pi$$ed about getting a CCC (ptooie!)
The second one will look just fine once the recipients indulge in some of whatever the wreckorator was on...maybe it was also *gruss*.
I can't be the only one who thinks the "Aussie" cake looks like a "map" of someone who sat in flour and then sat on the cake. It happens all the time!
My take on the dying giraffe ("MEL from Pittsburg") is that he is sinking in quicksand. Hurry and get a piece before it's too late! =^-.-^= (GOOD cakes are an endangered species; no worries on that count, here.)

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

It looks like that giraffe needs a cigarette, so he can match his cousin....smoking Easter lamb. Yikes!!

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

It must have been an Australia Day cake. But...

How the [beep] do you not know what the country you're living in looks like? If you're not sure you've got the stencil the right way around, maps are easy to find. Seriously. They make great references. Please use them.

(Warning: post made at 3 AM, may not be an indication of the author's non-sleepy opinion. It probably is though.)

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKatana Cat

I can hear Sarah McLachlan say "Won't you help this animal?" with that poor giraffe. "Thousands of animals are left neglected or abused just like this giraffe." ~I will be there for you!~

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterIsabella

"NO! Artax! You can get out! You can do it! Don't give up! Turn around! Move! You'll die if you don't move! ARTAX! You have to try! I won't give up, you're my friend! I LOVE YOU ARTAX!"

Thank you horrible cake, for bringing that memory (which the author of the book wrote was a metaphor against his own struggles with clinical depression) back again. Now if I can only find a puppy to kick...

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterChenaya

You can't really mean that you want the winkers to stop, not when they have such an awesome soundtrack!

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterAnna

I read the 2st wreck as :Hope the Gross is GRenrieR" o.O Because that totally makes sense...

That giraffe is terrifying. My 15-year-old has always had a thing for "long long necks" but I'm pretty sure that one would make her cry.

@SuBee - Happy Birthday weekend!

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

The Giraffe made me think of this:

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTina

Why can't you stop screaming?

Because that isn't a giraffe, that's why. It is the lovechild of a giraffe and Beetlejuice.

Scream on.

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterZelda

I petted and fed giraffes in South Africa. They don't look like that.

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterShauna

Is that a giraffe or Marilyn Manson in a leopard skin coat?

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterRuthAnn

That giraffe made me laugh out loud... And wonder who he got into a fight with...

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHAL

The second I saw the giraffe, I was transported to the future (in the past). 02:14 am Eastern Time on August 4, 1997. Judgement Day. I was just waiting on a Terminator to climb over that poor, melting giraffe. Then I realized, the giraffe IS the Terminator. And I keep looking for a glowing red eye in the closeups.

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterGTGirlKS

The NeverEnding Story references are spot on, and terrible. Stupid horse. I mean, stupid giraffe. And the worst part about that giraffe cake is that it was going to be a magnificent cake, great shape, cute positioning, too realistic to eat if you have a soul... But then the face, it all went downhill once the wrecorator got to the face.

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterCBushLite

Wait a minute, that looks suspiciously like the Giraffe and 5 Steps of Grief from Robot Chicken!

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterDiana

Look up "Robot Chicken Quicksand" and the Mel cake will make sense.

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie


January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterPogue Mahone 71

As a Tasmanian Aussie, I was ambivelent to see that the cake with the flipped map of Australia included my Island State. I have seen over on the Mainland, on more than one occasion, cards intended for the tourist trade with maps of Australia missing Tasmania. This is one instance where it might have been quite nice not to be included....LOL. Back to the cake, I'll bet it's not a mistake the decorator will repeat with the big chaps in Coles Supermarket management after him / her. It's a tough way to learn Geography, but it will be very effective!

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHazel Rice

I picture all the wreckporters out here arguing with ourselves about pointing out the grammar error in the first line.

"But we LOVE Jen!" we're all yelling to ourselves. And we do. We really, really do.

"But we're grammar police," we whine back. And we are. We really, really are.

About very few things have I ever been so ambivalent. Pardon me while my head explodes. With love!

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterAngelaS

You know, the giraffe cake isn't too bad. Just think how much fun it would be to lop off the head and neck?

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterDNA

The giraffe appears to be sinking in quick sand.

January 30, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTraci

Well now that I saw the giraffe I can't unsee it lol. Wonderous dreams await me I am sure. Thank you wreckerators. I am sure the customer shrieked in terror taking that home.

January 31, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

The giraffe reminds me of Jerome the Giraffe from The Friendly Giant. Anyone else from Canada remember that? No? Just me then? Ok.

January 31, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBea

I) PC alert: not sure I get the Aussie cake "outrage":
1) Whether you see this as the correct or wrong position depends on whether you have a Eurocentric world view or not. Nothing says all of our maps could not be "upside down" with Europe at the bottom. It's just what we are used to from the historical colonizers' perspective. (Also: Africa is usually depicted as much too small in relation to Europe. It's a contemporary mapping issue; you can look it up.)
2) That cake seems to be easy enough to position so that Australia is pointing the "right" side up, whatever you determine that to be. Unless I am missing something, there are no indicators on the cake which way it should face. Sooooooo...............?????????

II) More importantly: cake 2: even worse than the messed up spelling is the curling ribbon on the cake. Yuck, gag and spit. That is truly "gruss."

January 31, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterGG

I used to work in he printing trade. That "map" cake is to the image what we would call (if it were done from a film negative) a "flopped negative". It just means inverted. Not upside-down; just backwards. Wrong side up. A "do-over".A screw-up. There were other words for it, but y'all can use your snoitanigami.
=^-.-^= =v-'-v=

January 31, 2015 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns


January 31, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterscreaming goat

GG, I'm not sure what on earth you mean. The cake is not upside down. The stencil was put on backwards, flipping the image of Australia. Jen has even put a picture of Australia right next to the cake so you can easily see what's wrong. Please look a little closer next time.

'Eurocentric world view' indeed.

February 1, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBri

Er... GG the Australia cake is not upside down. It is back to front. As in a mirror image. Tasmania (the island at the bottom) should be on the right not the left.

February 1, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKarma

Bri and Karma: thanks for pointing that out. I get it now. Epic map reading fail, I guess. :-/

February 1, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterGG

Thanks for the giraffe nightmares! Love your blog!

February 3, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHeather Hinkle

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