10 Easy Ways To Completely Wreck Your Icing Balloons

It's almost TOO simple: a round blob with a string.

So how can you wreck the humble icing balloon?

Oh, my sweet, naive little baker friends.



1) Embrace The Airbrush:

I'm talking full-on bear hug territory here, folks. Love it. Use it. Defend it with your life. Don't ever let it go.


2) Choose Your Colors.... WISELY:

Crap brown with black "highlights?" Oooh, now you're cooking with gas!


Plus, anything that brings to mind bleeding orifices...



3) Remember Size Is Relative:

And you could totally fit a few more in there.


4) ...But Bigger Is Always Better:

Just throw a few tiny balloons on top to keep it confusing.


5) Of COURSE That Piping Tip Works

I mean, why wouldn't it?


6) Try Turning Them Into Insidious Ground-Dwelling Creatures:

::slither slither slither::


7) Or Colorful Hair Buns!

Floating grandma heads have never looked so festive.

(I'm not the only one seeing this, right?)


8) Gravity Schmavity:

Just be sure to never look at how real balloons work in real life, 'cuz that shiz will blow your freaking mind.


9) Look For Inspiration In Unlikely Places:

Like the wads of chewing gum under the counter!


And finally, the tried-and-true favorite of bakers everywhere:

10) Just Make Them Look Like Sperm:



Aww, three of them made it!


Thanks to Allison W., Erin, Becky G., Anne B., Hilary E., Mandy B., Rachel W., Brenda, Susan C., & Jason for finding some of the most hilarious balloon wrecks ever conceived.


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