NOOOOOOO!!!

Poor Darth Vader. He used to be the baddest of the bad guys, the deadliest dad, and the grumpiest force-choker around. Over the years, however, he's been reduced to a cuddly bear, a Hello Kitty parody, and a really excellent dancer.

Adding to the indignity, in 2011 George Lucas added some "tweaks" to the original Return of the Jedi which included a rather entertaining Vader yell, which has been described as "ridiculous," "undignified," and "Dude, it's a yell. What's the big deal?

Well, never fear, fellow fans! I'm here to help.

In fact, I promise you'll never think that yell is undignified again.

Compared to these.

NOOOOOOO....

OOOOOO.....

OOOOOOO....

Oh. Actually, this one's not so bad - since it's plastic and all. I just find it funny to imagine Vader using contractions. Go on, say it in your head. "LUKE I'M YOUR FATHER." No? Just me?

Right, moving on.

[Inhale]

....OOOOOOOOOO!!!!

 A grateful force-choke to Timbrely, Clare, Julie Anne D., Annie L., Arielle C., and Brenda J. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to watch the Vader TomTom commercial again. That thing cracks. me. up.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

Vehicular Cakeslaughter

Every now and then - and I'm not saying this happens often - professional bakers have a little trouble making cakes that look like...well, anything.

Perhaps hardest of all is the vehicle cake. There's just something about all those shapes and circles and squares that drives even the most hardened Shop-a-Lot Davinci to edible clip art with the watermarks still on:

Now, if only we had a picture of chocolate drizzle and sprinkles...

So let's say you want KITT from Knight Rider on your cake:

Binka binka binka binka dinka binka dinka binka...

[That was me singing the theme song. Obviously.]

Rather than attempt the entire car, your baker might try to home in on KITT's most distinguishing feature:

The ketchup-and-mustard smear under his seat.

Or how about this tractor?

At first glance, you might think this could be broken down into a simple drawing of two boxes on two wheels.

BUT YOU WOULD BE WRONG.

It's an extremely complicated design, and rendering it in icing is so unbelievably difficult that the finished product would be far beyond the bounds of mere mortal comprehension.

Yeah. Like that.

And finally, let's say your child wants a school bus cake:

(Oh, you know this is going to be good.)

You might end up with this:

It's not small. It's "fun sized!"
Wait. Can a bus be flaccid?

Thanks to Andie K., Brooke & Mike K., Lea B., & Pete H. for keeping us on track today.

*****

P.S. Did you know you can buy the entire series of Knight Rider on Blu-Ray for only $34? That's less than the DVD set!

Knight Rider, The Complete Series

I haven't see this show since I was about 10, so I'm curious if it holds up. If not, then I hope it's hilariously bad; anything in the middle is just boring. :p

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot: