Search

My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Feb092010

Conditions Froggy

I know a lot of people like frogs. Heck, even I think the bright green fella who hangs out on my front door is adorable. (Until he starts jumping in my direction, of course. Then he turns into a slimy hell beast who leaves me no choice but to climb shrieking onto John's shoulders to escape the "hop zone.")

Still, I don't really get the whole frog cake thing. Other than my front door buddy, the only other close encounter I've had with a frog was in 7th grade biology, and that one smelled anything but appetizing.

You could argue, and rightly so, that cakes in the shapes of animals are nothing new, so why am I picking on frog cakes?

Well, geez, man, just look at this thing:

He's mean, green, shaped like a tureen, and lookin' mighty PO'd about his toe issues.

(In his defense, those are some serious toe issues. Ouch.)

How's this for a scrumptious specimen?

Wow. PETA could use this guy in an anti-frog legs campaign. How could you possibly cut into that poor, terrified visage? Leave him and his splatted fly tongue alone, you heartless cake murderer!

At least this guy looks happy:

I'm guessing he's proud as punch of that funny little limb beard. Or has his chin sprung a leak?

Here's a sultry little number in honor of Valentine's Day:

This amorous amphibian is ready for romance!
And maybe some Visine, since her eyeballs appear to be on fire.

Also for Valentine's, here's a princely gem:

Or should I say princely jewels? (HEYO!!)

Bakers, seriously, I'm all for maximizing your cookie cutter designs, but using that cutter for frogs is, frankly, quite a leap.

Alden M., Casie G., Sharon P., Lauren M., Vanessa H., & Lynelle R., you think it's cold in that display case? Just wondering.

- Related Wreckage: So What Happens If You EAT the Frog?

« From the Bottom of My...Bottom | Main | European! »

Reader Comments (124)

#3 - "Not the Mama!"

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTaylor@MyOlderBrothers

Holy moley. That second one looks like something from Monsters, Inc.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFlea

I have to say, those "perky" frog cookies are actually pretty adorable :)

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

OMG. someone used the dong cutter for frogs.

A wrinkly dong cutter, at that. Why does a wrinkly dong cutter exist???

vw: mewbetra. My cakes are mewbetra than these.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMiranda

If you hadn't told me so, I wouldn't have known any of those cakes were supposed to be frogs, except maybe the Amorous Amphibian. And the Anti-Frog-Legs ad doesn't have any discernible legs. Have already been cut off?

Note to Wreckorators: Just painting anything green does NOT make it a frog.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

That one with the "chin legs" cracked me up! Why? WHY?! LOL!

And those cookies! Oh no. no. no. no.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBarb

Hahahahaha! This post had me rolling! LOVE the "limb beard" one!

Personally, I find the idea of cutting into any cake that is made to look like a living creature completely disgusting. Even something as adorable as that Eeyore on Sunday Sweets. Maybe especially with something as adorable as that. At least with these frogs, I would feel like I was putting them out of their misery.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBakingdom

I amphibian when I call those tempting!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdextrouslefty

Okay, I'm at the beginning of day 5 of being snow bound, with no end in sight. Your comments on the last froggy photo are the first thing I've found to laugh about in days. THANK YOU!!!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAliceBlue

Exactly what shape was the last cookie cutter supposed to be??? Even trying to imagine it upside down, I couldn't quite picture anything (besides the obvious) which that shape could represent...

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

Hahahaha! "Cold"!! Yep!!
Omg. LOL.
they are all scary. Except the cute jewels, which are just a really bad idea that was well executed.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAlex

I think you should have a Sunday Sweets for frog cakes! Because frogs definitely have more cutsie potential than they're showing here!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTiffany

THOSE ARE NOT FROGS! Those are just creepy green things.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRoo

My reactions: "Yikes, yikes, yikes, yikes, oh, that's not so... oh."

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

Oh wow those last frogs are just wrong LOL

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLauren Borquez

Frog #3 looks like Jake Black, dont you thinK? LOL

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNadia

I am one of the frog lovers that you speak of. I love all frogs, real or otherwise, so I would think that frog cakes would just be one of the best things that could ever happen to me. Um, yeah....not so much.

I think to make up for what you have done to me, you need to get busy for a sunday sweet of the most amazing frog cakes. I know they are out there!
Thanks anyway,
Becky

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Yikes. I don't think those last frogs are going to be leaping into carts anytime soon. Besides, tehy wouldn't have the bal--oh, wait...there they are.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterViewtiful_Justin

Oh yuck. I wouldn't eat those cakes if I was paid to. Would totally turn my stomach.

But I have to say the cookie frogs are cute.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMercy

My favorite is the second to last frog! He's so cute...in that LOL sort of way!

Jenn, you bring cake bliss to us all. :)

--Alicia
thewordshifter.blogspot.com

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAlicia

I think the frog cookie is actually a frog cutter. They just decorated it wrongly. Green penises are anything but appetizing.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercakelady72

Appropriately, number two gives new meaning to the phrase "potty mouth", seeing as to how it is completely constructed of icing "poo". Maybe it caught a bee instead of a fly and discovered it's allergic, or perhaps it is simply hopped up on grass...

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNancie

Are those last cookies wearing pearl necklaces?? Hardy-har-har.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCasey

The last ones are at least tidy.
The others are reminiscent of camp toilets.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDecadent Housewife

The unattatched limbs make me think that the first frog might really be a high school science experiment. Aren't they supposed to make sure the frog is dead before they start cutting things off?

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAlena

I think it'd be kind of fun to have a cake that you could dissect like a real frog... Is that just me?

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

Oh, my...I was right with you on escaping the hop zone. As in, my feet actually went up on the chair the moment I saw those. Yowza.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

Frog #2 looks like he ate somebody's finger and it's sticking out of his mouth. And the first and last frogs just look evil.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

I think the Amorous Amphibian, given it's spiky visage, might be one o' them thar Horny Toads.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarc

When would you ever use that cookie cutter design. Bacheleorette (probably misspelled that)Party is the only one I can think off.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLindalou

Yep, Jack Black's chin has grown some froggy legs!-Julie U.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Use your imagination...maybe they're HUGE breasted princesses!! The heart is in the right place!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDenise ~ Paper Ponderings

I know that the red coil on the first one is supposed to be the tongue and the black line the mouth. I *know* that. For some reason, though, I look at it and see the mouth as the nose and the red as something really gross coming out of it.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCharity

THE COOKIES HAVE A HEART ON AND ARE HAPPY TO SEE YOU! WHO COULD EAT A GREEN SMECKLE COOKIE WITH PIMPLES ON IT;S BALLS? OPEN WIDE!!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLAURA3232

The first one looks like it started off trying to be Oscar the Grouch and then veered off into the land of misfit playdough toys.

wv: moadve, as in We're gonma need moadve-tizin with these froggies!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

As the great Kermit said, "It's not easy being green."

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMJS

what SHOULD that cookie cutter be used for?!?!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterheather

were the cookie frogs perhaps an upside down mickey mouse cookie cutter?

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

Why, oh why is the second one eating a finger???

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

why does it not seem like Jen's voice anymore? I miss Jen's voice.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlois

I also thought the last frogs had giant froggie breasts, which leads me to wonder, do these cookies taste like chicken?

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

#3 looks like jabba the hut!!!!!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's sort of an eco-friendly blog. Very GREEN.

smirk.

http://mconnealy.blogspot.com/

I'm doing a book signing near McAllen Texas February 13. Details on my blog.

I write Romantic Comedy with Cowboys.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary Connealy

Hey Lois,

I don't know. Jen actually wrote this entry to be included in the book a little over a year ago but the book ran long and it had to be cut. So today, of all days, should sound just like Jen.

Hm.

john

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

When I see those frog cookies and any cookies made with that oh so special cookie cutter shape, all I can ever think of is the scene in Death to Smoochy!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertuddswife

#3 - Looks perverted...I mean seriously, it probably just molested some cupcakes and a box of ladyfingers but is ready with his reply "but THEY seduced ME."

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Seriously, that second one looks like my daughter's potty chair. Nice big hole and everything. This could be a really fun birthday party of hers coming up...

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterkeelhaulrose

Hilarious post, as are the comments so far.

Let me add my "Why?" to Miranda's "Why?"

And, no, Boob Nazi, it's not just you. However, the fact that it's also me probably isn't much comfort.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterburton

those cockie frogs have stds of some kind, and not of the sprinkle variety

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLittle Lovables

I agree with the first comment...#3 definately looks like the baby from Dinosaurs.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSteph

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Post:
 
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>