My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Once in a Lifetime Wrecks

Sometimes, something so noteworthy, so unique, so rare, so sparse, so infrequent, so atypical, so uncommon, so "totally rad" happens that there are really no words to explain it.

Thankfully, we're here to help... and we're professional* writers.


[*And by "professional" we mean "have access to - and no fear of using - a thesaurus."]

Halley's Comet whizzes through our skies once every 76 years. Something tells me this fiery gem will still be on the shelf in time for the next sighting in 2061.



Suggestively Hairy Graduation Cheese hasn't been spotted since he handed little Tommy Silverstein his 3rd grade diploma at Jameson County Elementary back in 1873.


It seems obvious that the Loch Ness Monster would receive a beautifully constructed cakey fanfare after her famous reported sighting back in 1933:

However, photographers rarely catch old Nessie in what would later be described as her "Can-of-Beans Pose," in which Nessie approaches the surface with an open mouth and an old-timey telephone cord protruding from her head. Very rare, this shot. Very rare.



[We have a feeling that these cakes are actually a guitar, a pencil, and a wide-mouthed bass, but our reality is more fun.]


Lesli W., Anony M., & Brandi M., you guys are great, significant, exceptional, extraordinary, humongous, ample, notable, redoubtable, dominant, imposing, majestic, splendid, killer, hunky-dory, and swell.

- Related Wreckage: World's Worst Pictionary Players


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Reader Comments (103)

It kind of looks like what I imagine the devil's guitar to look like. Not that I've imagine that, but I just thought about it.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

Oh! A pencil! Never would have guessed that....

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBethany

didn't catch the bass. funny

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCheryl Willis

I would have never figured out that was supposed to be a bass if you didn't fill me in! I prefer the Nessie interpretation LOL

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSuzanne :-)

That first one brings to mind the pictograms used for the "100 Worst Guitar Solos Of All Time" list compiled by Guitar Player mag in Dec. 2008. This cake seems to fit right in there.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterflying gargoyle

Thanks for the explanation -- I'd have never guessed the pencil or the bass!! -- Julie

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Okay, I understood the guitar, but loved the Haley's Comet explanation more. I thought the pencil was an acorn...but what's it holding? A thermometer, a hypodermic needle, half a sharpie? I just don't get it. I thought the bass was a shackle on some kind of telephone-cordish leash...
Makes me want pie.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMoosie McGra

I am laughing so hard. Funny!

(ps thanks for the identification on the bass)

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCookieMonster

I think that first one may be Epcot on fire being hurled through space! (wink, wink - evil grin)

WV: urgliss - Those are some of the urgliss cakes I've ever seen!

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenniffer

And I thought the pencil was just a face with a Simpsonian skin tone and a goatee, probably to represent the cake's recipient. Of course, with the little arms added, the goatee looked more pubic....

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

I'm glad you put the explanation at the bottom because you KNOW that some smarty-pants know-it-all is going to come on here and say "Tsk! Duh! Don't you KNOW that's supposed to be a guitar and a pencil and a wide-mouth bass? Might want to fix your post. I'm smarter than you."

As for the pencil, I thought it was a poorly done Spongebob!

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermimi

Okay, I see the guitar and the pencil...but I totally would not have known that was a bass! Yikes!

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAlbatross

Okay, the guitar and the pencil were identifiable despite the wreckiness. I assume that is a Graduation Pencil with a mortarboard and diploma? But the bass...NO idea. Was thinking some sort of monster from the lagoon!

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAlison

I like how the pencil appears to be holding a pen. Wha???

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It looks like the "Wide mouth bass" has an umbilical cord coming out of it's head.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMigrating Cocionut
April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDeb

I think you mean large-mouthed bass.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarcie

I had to click on the pencil to see it larger. At first I thought the diploma it is holding was a knife jammed into the cake, and since the cover was still on that would make it part of the design...

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPhaedra

Did anyone else think the first cake may have been celebrating the burning pain of an STD?

Thanks for id'ing the bass. I thought it was some sort of cookie monster-gone-bad cake.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterErin

I'm glad the commenters pointed out that the pencil (which I also first thought was a badly done Spongebob) is holding a diploma…. My first thought was, “Why is the pencil holding a writing utensil?”

The bass….. um… ya, never would have guess. Srsly! Why does it have teeth on the OUTSIDE of it’s mouth?? Or is it wearing one of those awesome dog-collar chokers?

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTiffany

I (sorta) see the guitar and the pencil... but has that 3rd decorator ever actually SEEN a largmouth bass?!

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterErin

I did not get any of those right! Wow. The first one looks like a... (To risk an Epocot, although no one said it yet unless unmoderated) a... rather fiery stylistic man part or a substitute thereof.
Name Withheld to protect the gutterbrained

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

the graduation cheese makes me think of the "I'm only a bill" song from School House Rocks

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That's a pencil??! I totally thought that was spongebob all grown up with a goatee! Really!

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLacey

enlightening post Number1! I perceive you have a proclivity for the grand eloquent...

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterVeggieT

haha. I didn't catch the pencil or the bass. Thank you Jen. We'd be lost without you.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterErin

Gosh, it's good that I come to Cake Wrecks every day, because I learn valuable information about the world around us. Thanks to that first picture, I now know that Haley's Comet is really a flaming poo ball! Now I'll be ready in 2061.

Thanks Jen! :)

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShannon

I want your thesaurus. It will make my life seem better, improved, ameliorated, more gooder...(see? I need it!)

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFlartus

No mortar board? No problem! Just stick a square of black plastic on top of a plastic TOP HAT.... there you go.
Nah, no one will notice. Just wondering, though--what is it, exactly, that a "pencil" (with brown lead & eraser--really?) graduates FROM?
The guitar accomplishes one very odd thing for me: reminding me of the fiery, searing, red-hot pain in the gut of advanced labor. Only because it looks strangely like a human pelvis. To me.
Just leave me alone.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

So instead of a telephone cord as Nessie's hair accessory, it's a string of fish poo trailing behind???

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChadwick ッ

A pencil? Wow, I was way off. I thought it was a constipated "Spongebob".

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSpanky

I'm not so sure about the bass, I still question the validity of that one.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDarcie

Tree Stump of the Apocolypse!!

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think the guitar looks alot like a pin I got from the Phoenix Hard Rock Cafe a number of years ago.

Also, is it a CCC? I am so glad I am no longer a "professional" cake decorator for a grocery store... I just could not abide by those cupcake thingies...

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdisneydiva


Can you guys do anything about the scrolling adds for cookbooks on the left hand side of the screen. It's so distracting and annoying that it makes it hard to read your hilarious posts.

Love this blog!!! :)

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

Ah, a PENCIL! I thought it was a really bad attempt at Spongebob!

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

I wish I could see the cake that's beside the blue thing (on the right side of the photo). I see part of a ruler, and something that resembles a giant, pointy pencil lead...

Ohhh... I get it.
It's almost time for school to be out!
So, OF COURSE every business establishment has to start the Back To School merchandising campaign. (!!!)



April 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Hey Becky,

Yup. That one was bugging me too.

Bah Bye.

john (the idiot who put it up in the first place)

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

But isn't the pencil holding a pen?!? Sooooo confusing!!!

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJohn and Sarah Sperry

The guitar and the pencil I got. The bass, though, not so much. I have faith in your research though, so I'm trusting your judgment.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSparky

I immediately thought of Schoolhouse Rocks for the pencil, too.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterarbed

**Suggestively Hairy Graduation Cheese**

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Thank you so very much for that! Made my whole day!

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarcy W.

The pencil looks more like a Beatnik banana. "Cool, man. You graduated." *snaps fingers*

The Wreckiness at its...finest(?) Especially the bass! Neat concept with points for effort but gets an "Huh??" for execution.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

My first thought upon seeing the bass cake was, "Release the Kraken!"

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterladycrim

As a teacher, I knew the "pencil" (and the quotes are warranted here) right away, having seen some of the worst pencil-themed gee-gaws at teacher supply stores. I knew the guitar right away . . . well, because I'm rad, OK?
But the bass? No way. I thought perhaps Kermit the Frog's head had exploded.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I don't understand why the "guitar" has random cupcakes in the corners. The pencil looks like it is holding a straight razor and is about to shave off its goatee.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMiradwyn

I saw a match on fire in the first "cake".

And Marcie, I can imagine you are not well liked at your job....

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRebecca F.

I agree with Rebecca F. The first cake appears to be a striking match.

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPatrick

Would NEVER have figured out the bass cake. Thanks for putting me out of my misery. Great cakes from true "PERFEZIUNALS".

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterYogaGal in the NW

Hmmm...that last cake looks quite a bit like a certain outdated internet meme...Y'know, the kind that 4Chan thought was hilarious when it first came out but has since been so overused that it can't even be used in an ironic way?

April 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Gravekeeper

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