Eat Your Heart Out, Shakespeare

[walking into spotlight]

[striking dramatic pose]

Poo bee...

... or NOT poo bee?

That is the question.

[raising fist to the heavens]

Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer 

the slings and arrows of outrageous fortunes,

Or to take arms against a sea of tribbles!

["Meep?"]

and by opposing...

END THEM.

["MEEP!"]

[raising both arms and bellowing]

Tie dye!!

To seep no more!

And by a sheep,

today we end the heartache

and the thousand natural shocks...

... is that a hair?! EW!

[Ahem.]

'Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished.

Tie dye, to seep, perchance on buttercream!

Aye,

There's the flub.

Blow, winds, and crack your heartfelt thanks to Jennifer T., Janet, Carol F., Lilly P., Amanda M., Alli S., Christy L., Sarah F., Sarah Jane, Brittany B., Paige H., and Karyn T, our Shakespearean pros.

****

PS: Been a while since English Lit 101? Then here, let me google that for you:

"To be, or not to be, that is the question:

Whether 'tis Nobler in the mind to suffer

The Slings and Arrows of outrageous Fortune,

Or to take Arms against a Sea of troubles,

And by opposing end them: to die, to sleep

No more; and by a sleep, to say we end

The Heart-ache, and the thousand Natural shocks

That Flesh is heir to? 'Tis a consummation

Devoutly to be wished. To die, to sleep,

To sleep, perchance to Dream; Aye, there's the rub."

*****

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

When In Doubt, Blame Deadpool

Cassidy ordered this unicorn sheet cake:

Which looks simple enough - and mostly plastic - so how do you screw that up?

Oh, it's easy! Here, I'll walk you through it:

1) Throw the order photo away. Who needs guidelines when you've got raw artistic talent?

2) The next day, vaguely remember you're supposed to make a unicorn cake.

3) Desperately search the bakery for anything with a unicorn on it, throw it in the photocopier with a bunch of curling ribbon on top, and slap that on a sheet cake.

4) Realize your photocopied unicorn has a person riding it, so cover that up with icing "hair" that floats a full three inches about the unicorn's head.

5) Add some vaguely passive-aggressive punctuation for flair.

DONE.

YOU'RE WELCOME, LADIES.

(Actually I have no idea what the hair is covering up; I just know it's covering SOMETHING. Personally I'm hoping it's Deadpool wielding a couple of battle axes, because that would be a hilarious. It's like the scratch-off card of cakes! SURPRISE!)

Thanks to Cassidy N. for the magic.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot: