Tanks For The Memories

Over the weekend John tried to "fix" my latest bout of insomnia by dragging me out to a Flea Market after I'd had about 2 hours' sleep. I assume there was a reasoning behind this, something to do with sunshine, or walking around, or the fact that - ah, yes - there was a World War 2 re-enactment happening in the field next door.

It looked kind of like this, only somehow less sweaty.

 

So there I was, staggering through aisles of dusty antiques, car stereos, and questionable bulk candy (c'mon, how old ARE those dried papaya slices, really?), when all of a sudden the ground is shaking with mortar fire and explosions.

I never knew tanks had old-timey Cadillac fenders on them.

Come to think of it, I still don't.

 

John and I went outside to watch the giant clouds of smoke and running soldiers and whatnot for a bit, and naturally I snapped a few pics and video for the 'gram.

Which... inspired a few questions.

Later, as I attempted to explain to a few bewildered Europeans why we - and by "we" I mean Americans - sometimes drive around in tanks and shoot blanks out of machine guns for 30 minutes on a Saturday, it occurred to me there are probably lots of things we - still mean Americans - do that must seem odd to internationals.

Like our obsession with cupcake cakes (ptooie!):

(This could be the sleep deprivation talking, but is that another tank?)

 

Or our bizarre tradition of writing "We hope you fail, you're dead to us now" on farewell cakes:

::helpless shrug::

 

Or - my personal favorite - there's the way we can expertly critique everyone's Töedinlochslingers on The Great British Bake-Off, even though the most complex thing we've ever baked are canned crescent rolls.

Really feeling this one.

Just me?

 

That's the beauty of cakes wrecks, though, minions; they bring our nations together.

Unlike tanks.

Unless the tanks are cakes, maybe. Oh! Or better yet, wedding cakes. But c'mon, where am I EVER going to find a tank wedding ca... yeah who am I kidding here.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

 

Tanks to Anony M., Shelley P., Christina H., Felicia R., Heather T., Rebecca K., & Lisa W. for helping me make Google searches for "Töedinlochslingers" go up about 1,000% today.

*****

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Sunday Sweets Would Like This Dance

It's National Dance Day, cake lovers!

(By Crazy Sweets, Germany)

 

And hey, I don't think I've ever featured dance Sweets before.

So let's boogie.

(By Op en Top Taart, The Netherlands)

Electric Avenue never looked brighter. I love these colors!

 

Or maybe a Sock Hop is more your style:

(By Cake Diane, Texas)

I'm a sucker for pink and teal with checkerboard tiles.

 

How about a wedding waltz?

(By Simone Louise, UK)

 

...with a sweet bouquet of flower girls?

(I can't find the baker! Help?)

I really thought their skirts were flower petals at first. So pretty!

 

Or maybe you're in the mood for something a little... dirty.

(Just Desserts By Jess, New York )

Heyooo.

Nobody puts this cake in a corner.

 

There are so many gorgeous ballet cakes out there, it was impossible to pick just one:

(By Rachel1984 using Alexandria Pellegrino's online class)

Love the drama of all this black and gold.

 

Then there's this one!

(By Kek Couture, Istanbul)

Those paintings on the bottom are giving me all the heart eyes. They almost made me miss the flying fairies on the sides!

 

I bet you never knew a hip-hop cake could be this Sweet:

(By 927 Cake Co., New Jersey)

'Cuz I didn't! This is the cutest.

 

If a rainbow ever came to life as a dance troupe, I bet it would look just like this:

(By Art 2 Eat Cakes, Colorado)

According to the baker this was inspired by the Rainbow's daughter, Polychrome, and all her cloud sisters - which are characters in Frank Baum's book "Road to Oz." So THAT's something amazing I learned today.

 

Now, I was going to end there, but then John convinced me you guys needed an extra little something today - something you'd totally love and not be offended by AT ALL.

So without further ado, please enjoy this cake of a Purple Minion Pole Dancer.

(By Vintage Cake Fairy, UK)

Bahahahaa!

Yep, that's exactly what we needed today.

 

Happy Sunday, my friends! Go dance like nobody's watching... or like everyone is. ;)

*****

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 Visiting Amazon through those links will help support the site, and costs you nothing. Thanks, guys!

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