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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Shamrocks? How About ShamPOOS?



Those almost make me long for the days of anthropomorphized, lumpy-armed clover characters.


Ok, I think it's time we addressed the elephant in the room, guys.

Otherwise he'll just keep trampling on all the shamrocks.

Besides, maybe he'll remember what one looks like.


Not quite...

Egads! A pox upon thine cake!

Hey, you know what it is? I think I figured it out: the bakers just need a base of reference! A small photo, perhaps, or some shamrock-shaped things, perhaps made out of plastic...


Never mind.

Feelin' "lucky," punk?

'Cuz with fronds like those, you've definitely got anemones.

Thanks to Trina D., Michele T., Cara H., Alena C., Sara, Coreena N., Nell B., Robin, and also the elephant in the room, who, when confronted with today's wrecks, offered this insightful commentary:

We hear ya, dude.

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Reader Comments (81)

That first one is so disgusting. Ugh! I'm glad I haven't eaten breakfast yet.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

Here's shampoo for our real friends, and real poo for our sham friends

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKandaBer

I was giggling at the cakes and commentary, but that elephant made me lose it. Could we please ask him to go trample the CCCs (ptooie!)?

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDeirdre

Rule one of piping (which, oddly enough, they do NOT cover in Wilton classes): NEVER pipe greenish-brown icing.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMonica

I do believe I'd take a CCC (ptooie) over that nasty mess in the first one.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Okay, I always read the other commenters saying they spewed coffee across their keyboards, but I never actually did this myself until I read the "fronds" and "anemones" line today!! Kudos, CW, you have outdone yourself.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That poor green peacock, with those ugly brown pock mocks on it's tail feathers!

And the first one definitely is the same stuff I scoop out of the cat box. No question.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

wv: sedican

Baker: What's your problem? I never sedIcan draw a shamrock.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

Wouldn't all of these malformed shamrocks make a person UNlucky?

Just sayin.'

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMs. Blasé

I, too, lost it at "fronds" and "anemones." And the elephant was just too adorably funny. My morning has been made!

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKaren %)

Is it just me, or do some of those shamrocks look like elephants? Especially the first big one...

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterellie

The first one reminds me of what I just found in my son's diaper. Same color and everything.

WV: perts. Hey, Jen and John, comparisons to green baby poo is just one of the perts of your job.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterelissa

BAHAHAHA! oh poopy St. Patrick's Day cake, why are you so poopy? Who cares, as long as I get my morning laugh fix <3 :)

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAna V.



WV - Banin "After seeing these wrecks we should be banin shamrocks on cakes."

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

When I saw the title to this post, I thought "NOOoooo!"

But I clicked anyway. :)

(And I think that poxed one is actually the very rare bio-botanical hybrid known as the Shamurkey.)

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFlartus

Tiny baby elephant: Adorable.

Sham-Poo cupcakes: Not so much...

Oh, and I think you switched two pictures, there in the middle... (I'm pretty sure the Sham-peacock was supposed to go with the commentary on the picture below it).

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma!

Blech to the first one. To the rest-WTF! O_o

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!
"with fronds like those you've definately got anemones" BRAVO!! BRAVO!!
(Couldn't you find any deep fried shamrock cakes? What a shame)

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

Is Cake #6 made from a turkey template?

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That first one looks a lot like the gifts my dog left in the living room the other night, when he wasn't feeling so well & nobody was awake to let him go outside....

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

Long time viewer, first time poster...

I have to say this is the first time a cake on here has made my stomach roll. The first one with the mossy/moldy sham-poos is pretty gnarly.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTheCommune

Gumby! I used to love that show when I was a kid.
Rainbows! with garnish.
The Blob! or a misshapen cactus.
um...I think I just failed the Rorshach test.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjohn

hahaha "A pox upon thine cake"! I had to try really hard not to laugh loudly & wake my sleeping child! Great post!

LOL ShamPOO!! that green is way off...and the consistency is someone who ate too much green icing....

#5 looks like an elephant
#6 looks like a shamcock? (shamrock/peacock hybrid)
#7 is a wonky umbrella.

wv: ensmint. when you taste said green icing and realize the flavor--"ensmint!"

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjo

Poor little Leprechaun must have one heckuva bad flu to produce those awe-inspiring poo-piles. But i must thank you...Nothing better than a poo-cake to help me stick with the diet ... appetite officially G-O-N-E!

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSandra

Note to self: no more reading CW before breakfast. Really.

(and kudos for the R&J reference...)


March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

So... nobody's up in arms to angrily defend THIS beautiful manifestation of a beloved culture?




Happy non-Epcot day to you all.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMC

Ugh, I just about lost my breakfast looking at the first one & I haven't even eaten yet!

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLCT

The third cake from the bottom looks like it started out as a turkey cake and then just got covered with green frosting to make it look like a clover.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterThe Black Dog

"'Cuz with fronds like those, you've definitely got anemones."

I just have to say this is the finest pun I have seen in a long time. You got a mastery of botany, zoology, and a popular saying all into just nine words. Wow!

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Now, while St. Patrick's Day has a reputation as a drinking holiday, I would like to point out the following:

1) Bakers should not drink before decorating the cakes as wonky shamrocks result.

2) Customers should drink before picking up the cakes so they won't notice the wonky shamrocks.

3) There is not enough alcohol on the planet to make anyone want to eat that

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLeftWingLock

What's up with the green turkey?
My Mom has shamrocks growing in her garden. They look nothing like these cakes- or the green plastic things either for that matter.

WV: rentede: these cake wreckerators just rentede some cake decorating videos so they will do better next time.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

nice owl city reference. love it!

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered Commentercaitlin

We hereby offer you ShamPoo, because we don't have any real poo....

WV: splartiv. Seems like an appropriate new word (adj.) to describe that first wreck.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAuntie J

I'll take anthropomorphized anything over cakes like the first one. It's like when, as children, we made mud pies out by the barn, and... well, you know how that turned out.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Why use shampoo when you obviously have so much of the real thing?

wv: flizzyma-- I don't know what to do with that, but just thought I'd share.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

ShamPOO indeed. *shudders* o_O

Oh, and bonus points for the Finding Nemo reference. :D

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

You know what, say what you will, but I think the sham-poos are actually the closest ones to shamrock shapes. How sad is that??

WV: chedojo. Where left-wing revolutionaries go to work out.

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermin

Finding Nemo! That was a Finding Nemo reference, right? Cuz if it wasn't... then this is really embarrassing. *looks around innocently* *runs away*

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Yeah, it's logically hypothetical to assume one could pipe 3 simple loop shapes when they've got a plastic template right in front of them, but I guess we can just cut them some slack and say, nice try, guys! "Close enough!" (in quotation marks! Because "quotes" make things more "funner"!!!! Ever!!! Always!!! Ok, I'm getting ahead of myself here).

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm sorry, but the "anthropomorphized, lumpy-armed clover character" looks like male parts holding a dog bone!

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Haha, the second picture down is from of the corporate-designated CCC's for St. Patty's Day. This is NOT what it's supposed to look like!

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBen

My fave is the second to last, with the tiny plastic references all around the edge as well as right on the "clover"...AWESOME!

And, Jen, you gotta design a CW keyboard protector...I think a lot of your readers need one!


March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterValenta

Lovely post today!

I say any piping with the round tip should be off-limits. No one seems to be able to use it right, no matter what color the frosting is. Ugh!

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

The first one makes me want to go to the top of Mount Wanna-hock-a-loogie. Blecht!

The rest made me think of Gumby, peacocks, and that people just don't have a clue.

Awwwwwwww cute widdle baby elephant! :-)

wv: bodeba: Barry Manilow singing with a cold...At the bodeba, bodeba banana, the hoddest spot nord of Habana

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLoo-E Loo-I

This was a funny post, as usual, but Flartus' comment about the Shamurkey made me LOL for real!

wv: gesti - I gesti baker has never seen a real shamrock before!

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@MC: I was wondering the same thing. ;)

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

LOL gotta love when they include "unnecessary quotation marks". The one looked more like a peacock...

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStacy and Ellie

Some of these sham rocks look better than those cakes:

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

Those cupcakes...
The color...disgusting! The texture...blech. The idea of eating them...eeeeeeewwwwww!

March 16, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatiMomKat

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