Jen Takes a Chill Pill

Heeeeeey guuuuuys. Jen here. Now, I might have had to take an itty bitty tiny dose of Xanax earlier today, and I might be feeling a liiiiittle bit relaxed right now.

Me [looking at the "to-post" wrecks]: "Meh. These cakes aren't so bad. I'mma go pet the cat."

John: "Oh, you want bad cakes? I'LL FIND YOU BAD CAKES."

[fifteen minute pause while I smile dreamily at the wall]

 John: "Ok, here we go. How about ... THIS."

 Me: "It's the head-shrinky guy from Beetlejuice. Nice. I'mma go pet the cat."

John: "HANG ON. I've got better ones. Here, look at this:"

[long, considering silence]

Me: "Ew." 

John: "... and?" 

Me: "And what?"

John: "All you've got is 'ew'? How about a 'til death makes us parts' joke, or, or, something about eye balling the problem? C'mon! Work with me, here!"

Me: [snoring]

John: "Jen. Jen. Jen."

[enlarging another photo and angling screen in my direction] "JEN!"



John: "... and?"

Me: "And I think I need another Xanax."


Thanks to Suzanne G., Sarah S., Anony M., Jude S., and artist Katie Cook, who has just the surprise I need for John later, OH YES.