Wednesday
Feb102010
From the Bottom of My...Bottom
February 10, 2010 Why give your heart to that special someone this Valentine's Day, when you can give him/her something even more special:
your colon. You know, this is so moving, I think I feel a song coming on. That, or a bad case of stomach flu. [head tilt] No, no...I'm pretty sure it's a song. (Whew!) Ok, then - c'mon, everyone, sing it with me!
Laast V-day, I gave you my heart,
But the very next day, you gave it away.
Thiiiis year, to save me from tears,
I'm gonna give you my co-lon (colon!)
Psst. Soon everyone will want the coffee cake colon, Charissa B. - pass it on!
- Related Wreckage: Valentine's "Winners"
Reader Comments (128)
Jen, can you find out the real story behind this?
Was it for a doctor or someome wo beat cancer/
Im SURE these's a good explanation
Just had to sing the song out loud. LOVE it!
Thanks for the laugh, Jen!
"I love you so much, I ripped out my colon and served it up on a platter for you, honey. Top that."
Yuck.
TJB
I've never been so "moved"! How could anyone pass this up? It's the perfect cake for when you need to drop the kids off at the pool party.
That took guts.
Wrecker knew a bit about anatomy, but got it wrong. Not even just upside down or backwards, just... wrong.
Ohhhh, the red goop pouring over the edges (or is it trying to escape) really does it for me. That's the most offensive thing I've ever seen come out of a place that sells food.
Oh, Jen- I love your song! That tune tortures me each Christmas & I'm glad to see it being put to better use. That's too "special!"
At first glance I thought it was a lobster cake.
With the creepy "I love you" scrawled over to one side, I'd say this is a pretty big contender for a stalker cake.
That has to be the grossest cake I have ever seen! What was the baker thinking?
W: pridness
The baker obviously has no pridness in his work.
Okay, ew.
Not to mention - I curse you. I have had that stupid song in my head since reading this post over an hour ago. AARGHHHHHH!
Diana
The cake's nasty, yes. But it was worth seeing just for the song. I totally cracked up! (And now I'll be singing it for the rest of the day.)
Wow, this cake is much pretty disturbing.
I...I really should have known better than to eat while coming here. xD That is absolutely repulsive. It makes me question the sanity of humanity sometimes. Good god. D:
Somewhere in the world, George Michael is so sorry he didn't think of that one first, I'm sure. :D
nice wham! reference. that cake is almost shocking. eww.
-helen
The best explanation I can come up with is cartoon-style, overly lipsticked lips... maybe?
I go with the lobster mutant colon valentine's day innard cake/roll. I wonder if the filling is similar to red velvet cake?
¨Mama, it´s meat with mushies!?¨ Gideon, 2yrs
*runs screaming*
The label says:
Large Coffee Cake with Icing
10.00
How could they go and ruin something so good?
Womstr- Must be the monster the wrecktator had in mind when making this cake.
Yeah, I didn't see that as a colon. I saw hoo-ha of the female variety. Although I gotta say, it would be pretty cool to have a hoo-ha that says "I love you" in a very threatening manner.
HeeHeeHee!!! A 'Wham!' Reference! Love it!! The cakes...not so much.
Yeah. Totally what I dig for V-Day. "Here, honey. I, um, bought you an oversized, uh, body organ..." Wife: *screech!* "...to *eat*." Wife: *thudunk* (hits the floor). Too Row-a-mantic for words. Thanks CW! :)
y'know...I think this "cake" really IS meat!
Perhaps smoked salmon, even.
And the scary looking I LOVE YOU?
I think it's written in mayonnaise.
WV: jarly -- this thing is way jarly.
I see two red sea horses rubbing noses, but I'm just happy it's not the usual demons screaming at me to do bad things.
Emerson
Another good reason to make your own cakes.
At least I don't want any carbs now!
I think I've worked out what this "cake" is for! It's for the really shy Valentine....
"Ummm...Mary-Sue? Err...I've been trying to get up the guts to tell you I love you. Isn't it great? I grew it myself!"
Omg, that looks really hideous.
But ROTFLMAO over the song. ;-)
Ugh. Just .... ugh.
Ewww....icky, seriously awful.
You realize that the combination of the title of your post and the "Why give your heart to that special someone this Valentine's Day, when you can give him/her something even more special" sounds like an "innapropriate" joke, right...?
If I worked at a bakery and saw something like that in the display cooler....I would DEMAND that the person responsible be FIRED! That's just disgusting.
I thought it looked like a uterus or afterbirth. The gift that keeps on giving!
Disgusting, yes, but it made me laugh. All I could think of was Mark Lowry's bit about the Old Testament seat of the emotions being the bowels, not the heart. "Oh, baby. OOOOh, baby. You MOVE me."
HOLY CRAP!!!! (So to speak...).
That is so freakin disturbing it makes my colon spasm, which in turn causes me to have the runs...oooohhhhh yuck.
It's as if Hannibal Lecter sent you a Special Valentine's gift and forgot the chianti, ugh!!!!
Wow....love the Wham reference...lol
Yeah....I work at one of the chain stores that make these king cakes, and yes there is a awful heart shaped king cake that is just gross looking after you put on the icing and red and pink sprinkles.... should have seen the football one's that were made! YIKES!
So, this is why I wait to read your blog after lunch!
Ewwwwwwww!
Scully
What in hades was that supposed to be? A heart? Lips? Something I won't even say with children present?
Today is my twenty fifth birthday, and since I didn't get a cake, I decided that whatever you'd posted today would be my unofficial birthday cake.
Oh, what a lucky girl I am. : P
WV: "proli" - That's proli the worst birthday cake I've ever had.
"Excuse me while I go gouge out my mind's eye."
So, when Whitney Houston sings "where do broken hearts go", we can respond "at the bakery." d
Not only is it ugly, it appears to be solid frosting.....
Just another reason to say "no thanks"!
Hey, I have an idea!
Any wrecktator that finds a wreck should camp out and wait to take a picture of the person that buys it.
They could even interview the person..."I'm here with George who just picked up this valentines cake, and George, tell us....what made you choose THIS one?"
Hehe...
That may just be the most disgusting cake thingy EVER!!
But... it has sprinkles! Or red sugar, anyway. (check it out at larger size). Who doesn't want a colon with SPRINKLES!!!
WV: martab - My... urp... martab's gettin' awful high i think i'll go wreckerate a cake now...
And I thought YESTERDAY was confusing.
It looked like sludge coated croissants to me, you know, besides scary meat or a va jay jay.
Sarah
WV- Endha: You don't want to see this come out the other endha.
LOVE THE SONG! =D